Friday, February 26, 2010

美华人留学生蚁族调查:纽约版唐家岭

http://news.creaders.net/immigration/newsViewer.php?nid=422058&id=963622

纽约也有“唐家岭”

  华人“蚁族”不愿当“海待”

  “蚁族”,大学毕业生低收入聚居群体的典型概括,意为犹如蚂蚁般的“弱小强者”。有趣的是,“蚁族”现象,不光发生在中国,也发生在美国。美国不光有土生土长的“蚁族”,还有留学生“蚁族”。近日,记者探访了纽约80后华人“蚁族”聚集区,揭秘“年轻而无奈,努力却无助”的美国“蚁族”生活。

  本报记者/严姗隽 特约记者/罗慰年 见习记者/周佳 发自纽约

  纽约版唐家岭:

  月租仅250美元

  唐家岭,北京最著名的“蚁族”聚集村之一,距天安门广场20公里。来自全国各地约5万名毕业生租住于农民修建的五六层的民房中,每层12间,每个房间10平方米,两三个人挤一间,最多有七八十人共用一个厕所和厨房的。

  也许,每座繁华的超级大都市背后,都有这样一个唐家岭。曼哈顿的“唐家岭”集中在东百老汇地区,而法拉盛的则散落在华埠的民居里。它们有着共同的特点,离商业区不远,不需要汽车代步。比起动则1500美元/月的公寓房租来说,租金低廉且生活设施完备。于是,这里成了80后华人“蚁族”的最好选择。

  把破旧的老房子分隔成若干房间,一个房间七八个平方米,铺3张床,每个床位250-300美元/月,几十个人合用一个厕所、浴室。在法拉盛,一位来自广州的妇女告诉记者,她把自己租的房子分出一个铺位来,每月租金260美元。若是嫌贵,还有更“省俭”的方法,一张床2人白天黑夜轮流住,甚至3个人轮流,每人每天睡8小时,这样一来,最低每月只需要付出80多美元。

  毕业即失业,

  大学生成小时工

  风风光光出国,从全美名校毕业,身上的光环尚未褪去,却只能提着行李搬进7平方米的小屋,跟外卖小弟、洗碗工混居一处抢厕所。每个人背后,都有一个艰难转型、放下身段接受现实的辛酸故事。

  十多年前从上海赴美的曾姨替华人当保姆。她的儿子十六七岁时跟随母亲来纽约读高中。2005年高中毕业后顺利考入一家纽约州立大学。4年后,拿到本科文凭,英文倍儿溜。

  这样的条件,要是在金融危机发生前,找个年薪5万美元的工作绝对没有问题。可人算不如天算。谁知道,小曾的毕业时间恰恰就在2009年。于是,毕业之日便成了失业之时。

  求职简历发出去了几百封,却都“随风飘去”。近一年来,小曾始终找不到一份全职拿年薪的工作。只好到曼哈顿的一家小公司当小时工,每小时十几美元。

  这点收入,当然租不起一间像样的公寓,于是,只能到东百老汇当“蚁族”。小曾告诉记者,像他这样“毕业即失业”的80后留学生,身边特别多,“一个圈子里能数出好几个来。”那天,他跟妈妈一道去租房子,与同是华人的房产经纪人聊了起来。听说小曾的经历和遭遇后,五十多岁的房产经纪人脱口而出:“我的儿子毕业到现在,也没有找到工作呢,哎……”

  宁当“蚁族”不做“海待”

  经济不好,即便美国青年毕业之后,都难免当“蚁族”,何况华裔留学生?

  正在杜克大学读研究生的26岁美国人Ken算是一名本土“蚁族”。为了不欠债,他发明了独一无二的宿舍:一辆1994年的福特厢型车。

  2009年春天,Ken花1500美元买了这辆厢型车。车子就停在学校宿舍附近。晚上,他用睡袋睡在车后座;白天,他用露营设备煮饭;洗澡,他到大学的健身房里解决。厢型车离厕所大约半公里,夜晚便忍着。

  Ken这办法,被中国留学生赵兰学了起来。赵兰毕业于纽约罗切斯特市排名美国前100名的一所大学。当年出国留学,父母为其省吃俭用。而赵兰一年要花掉4万美元的学费和生活费,到2007年毕业后,却没有如愿以偿找到一份高薪的工作。

  无奈之下,赵兰过了一段“啃老”的日子。后来,远在国内的父亲恨铁不成钢,狠了狠心,停了他的生活费。赵兰干着急也没用,只得把该卖的行李卖掉,每天白天到大学图书馆看书,准备考研。晚上,就学起Ken,在车里过夜。

  幸好那时是夏天,虽然不至于冻死,但晚上车子停在停车场,关上车门不透气,半夜蚊子成群结队出动,他倒是成了蚊子们的饕餮。

  父亲实在看不下去,想让儿子回国当“海龟”,怎么都比在美国睡在汽车里当“蚁族”强啊。可赵兰却铁了心留在美国,“宁在美国当‘蚁族’,也不回国做‘海待’。”

  坚守希望,“挺下去就好了”

  就像有很多人问唐家岭的外地大学生,为什么不回家乡找个工作,小赵们常常被人劝着回国。但或许是出国时承载了太多的东西,不能“衣锦还乡”,如何面对含辛茹苦的父母呢?于是,他们只能坚守在笼子般的小屋里,从低做起,等待着幸运女神的惊鸿一瞥。

  2008年大学毕业的王家兄弟来自台湾。两兄弟长得人高马大,老二比较文静,老大则“口水多过茶”,学的都是金融学。毕业后,两人马上在华尔街找到了高薪的工作。谁知道,2008年9月,金融风暴袭来,才工作几个月就失业了。

  又不缺胳膊少腿,总不能老是在家“蜗居”吧?在“啃老”一年后,在母亲的全力支持下,2009年夏天,两兄弟办了一家夏令营,专收华裔新移民子弟。

  从华尔街的明日之星,转到法拉盛华埠民居开“小作坊”,其中经历难以一一尽数。大王告诉记者,这样的夏令营在华人集中的法拉盛,一个夏天能冒出好些家,竞争十分激烈。“我们夏令营的学费是全法拉盛最便宜的,每个学生2个月才收300美元。”

  问题是,学费少并不能保证客源广进。他们没有丝毫办学经验,有的课程,报名的人才小猫两只三只,但一样要付老师教课费,挣的钱还不够付工资,“纯粹亏本赚吆喝。”

  但无论如何算是有事做了,大王看上去挺有信心:“我们第一年先打知名度,挺下去就好了。”

  是的,挺下去,总会有希望。因为他们的高智商、高学历背景,更因为他们愿意不懈努力,也已经学会了在艰难中守住希望。

  2009年底,小赵找到了自己的第一份工作,在纽约某经济研究所,参与中国经济数据的统计研究。

  就像曾鼓励了这一代80后留学生出国求学的那句广告语说的:“从绝望中寻找希望,人生终将辉煌”。

Thursday, February 25, 2010

“有点笨有点傻”

“有点笨有点傻”

http://news.creaders.net/photo/newsViewer.php?nid=422163&id=963842&aid=14
  虽然兽兽至今仍没有现身,不过记者从一些从事汽车报道的同行处了解到,老家是济南的兽兽平时一个人住在北京,妈妈有时候要到北京来照顾女儿。“她妈妈的身材就很好,所以造就了兽兽的好身材。”谈到恋情,兽兽明确表示现在没有男朋友,也没有时间去考虑。还有网友翻出了兽兽刚出道时的写真,认为其下巴、鼻子、眼睛和胸应该都是后天整过的。

  之前,兽兽曾在网志上写道,自己最大的优点是认真、细致和听话,最大的缺点则是太容易相信别人,“有点笨还有点傻”。这让人联想起了艳照门女主角阿娇的名言:“好傻好天真。”

金融海啸后一份滴血的自白书

他为什么要死?金融海啸后一份滴血的自白书

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

http://news.creaders.net/headline/newsViewer.php?nid=422184&id=963884&dcid=6

星岛环球网 2010-02-25 03:01:54

  二零一零年二月十八日,被友人称为性情温和,爱好音乐的五十三岁电脑软件工程斯安德鲁·约瑟·斯塔克,在烧掉自家的房子后,驾驶私人小型飞机撞向德州奥斯汀的联邦税局大楼。犹如九一一重演的大楼着火场面,令人望而心悸,当地警方和联邦官员事后急忙郑重说明事件并非恐怖袭击,只是一名男子对税局不满的暴力报复行为。因为不是恐袭,死伤人数也不多,公众和媒体似乎都放心了,新闻热了不过三天便悄然淡出。不论外界如何诠释,事实真相可以从斯塔克在其网页留下的五千字自白书找到答案。自白书注明了作者的生卒年份,说是遗书会更贴切。

  斯塔克选择了以暴力方式结束生命,还累及无辜,是社会不能接受的偏激行为,但他绝对不是一名疯子,他曾经也勇敢和理性地面对生活上的各种不顺遂。五岁失去父亲,七岁时母亲也自杀,令斯塔克四兄弟姐妹顿成孤儿。才小学二年级便遭逢巨变,他有千万个理由可以埋怨社会或自暴自弃。但他没有。反而深切体会掌握自己命运非常重要。于是他成功地念完大学,并晋身科技精英行列。在刻苦的大学阶段,他说曾经好几个月三餐都只吃面包和花生酱,吃饼干已算是奢侈。

  大学毕业后,斯塔克为自己的人生定下目标,就是经济上要独立自主,不仰赖刻薄寡恩的大企业照顾。就在这追求独立自理的过程中,因经济大环境、政府的决策和个人疏忽,斯塔克经受一波又一波的挫折。原本过着中产生活的他,最终落得连退休帐户的存款都得挪用,还欠下税局的税。

  没错,斯塔克结束了自己的生命,但与一般自觉生无可恋的自杀者不同。主流媒体和博客对于这封遗书的理解,几乎一致地只聚焦在“反税收”的层面上,把事件与过去反国税局的暴力与非暴力运动相提并论──看来这解读不太准确。从年青时代便开始与税局交手的斯塔克,在半百的人生中经历过凶险的高低起伏,会单纯因为税局而走上同归于尽的绝路吗?细读其遗书,便知斯塔克过去不论对政府有多不满,都寻求在体制内解决问题,他并不是天生就叛逆的无政府主义者。
  
  他决心以死相搏,针对的并非税局,而是整个他认为不公义的美式资本主义社会和政治制度。自白书末尾,他用了两句短语概括评论共产主义社会和资本主义社会的分别,可见他是对社会制度失望。税局,只是一个具体象征。

  他不忿于联邦政府和政客只管拯救无良的大企业家、他怨中产阶级永远是被剥削的弱势群体、他恨在政治制度中没有发言权、他叹每周工作一百小时仍一无所有、他哀百姓甘于做“沉默的羔羊”。从自白书的理性论述可见,斯塔克绝非因沮丧而找人陪葬,而是自信这是对现制度的一次绝地反击。自言不相信暴力的他,自以为制造出一则重大的流血事故能唤起人们对社会不义的关注。斯塔克错了,一是他不应选择暴力,二是就算使用了暴力,他的名字也不消几天便淹没在其他新闻里;而他最鄙视的的政客,倒急不及待地拿他来助选,消费他仅存的剩余价值。

 不满官商勾结
 政府在金融海啸只救助大企业
 
  如果你正在阅读这些文字,你必定在问:“为什么这事非要发生呢?”简单的答案是,原因很复杂,而且已经酝酿了很长一段时间。多个月前我就开始写这段文字,本意是作为一种疗伤,但我认识到这个世界上根本没有足够的治疗可以修补早已破碎的东西。当然,只要我愿意,这段独白大可以举出一个又一个例子。我发现这段写作过程让人沮丧、乏味而且很可能毫无意义,尤其是因为我毫无能力在思潮汹涌之际细腻地陈述我的看法。我不知道到底这样做有多少治疗的效果,但在此绝望时刻我别无选择。

  我们从小接受的教育是,如果没有法律,就没有社会,只有混乱。悲哀的是,我们从小就被洗脑,相信我们以奉献和服务换来的是政府对所有人一视同仁,更进一步相信这个国家有自由,我们要以生命捍卫我们开国元老们所代表的崇高信念。记得吗?其中之一是“没缴税没代表权。”我花了成年人的所有时间来推翻小时候几年内学到的这些废话,现在任何人如果质疑这一原则的话马上就会被贴上“怪人”、叛国者或更差的标签。

  很少几个在职者会说自己没有缴过足够的税款(我也是其中之一),但在我一生中,我可以相当肯定地说没有一个政客在投票时将我或我的利益考虑在内。同理,他们对我或我要说的任何话没有一点兴趣。

  为什么,当一小批流氓和恶棍犯下不可思议的暴行(比如通用汽车GM的高层多年来的所为),当他们的金钱列车因为超负荷着他们自己的贪婪和天大愚蠢而要撞毁时,联邦政府的整个机制就会全力开动,毫无困难地在不是数个小时就是数天内为他们施援呢?但与此同时,成为笑话的美国医疗体制,包括药厂和保险公司,正在每年谋杀数以万计的民众,从被他们压榨的尸体和受害人处偷钱,这个国家的领导人却认为此事的重要性,远不如救助几个他们的卑鄙和富裕的密友。然而,我们的政治“代表”(窃贼、骗子和只顾自己的小人是更为准确的说法)却有无穷无尽的时间,每年坐在那里辩论“糟糕的医疗健保问题”的现状。很显然,只要死人不挡在公司利益滚滚而来的路上,他们就认为这不是危机。

  批评税法不公,偏利于有钱人

  还谈公义?别开玩笑了!

  哪个有理性的人可以解释我们的税制以及实际上整个税法体制中存在的那些累赘?我们的制度如此复杂,就连最聪明的学者大师也无法理解。然而,它却不留情面地向它的受害人“问责”,要求他们肩负遵守法律的责任,即使这些法律连专家也不懂。法律“要求”在税单末尾有一个签名,但没有人可以真确地说他们明白他们签名的东西是什么,如果这不算“胁迫”的话,不知道什么才是。如果这不是极权统治的体现,那没有什么是了。

  我是怎么走到这一步的?

  我在1980年代早期首次接触到真实的美国噩梦。在接受16年教育后,我很不幸地有了一个荒诞自负的想法,那就是我能读和明白英文。一些朋友介绍我加入一个阅读和讨论“税法”的小组,尤其集中于税法中有关“免税”的部分,正是这些免税导致庸俗腐败的机构比如天主教会出奇的富裕。我们认真地学习这些法律(在一些“最好”、高薪和资深的税务律师帮助下),然后开始和这些“大佬们”做一样的事(除了没有以上帝之名向我们的信众骗财或者向政府隐瞒我们的巨额盈利)。我们尽最大努力光明正大地做事,遵守所有的规则,完全就像法律允许的那样做。

  这项实验和尝试的本意是,对法律进行一番十分必要的重新审议,因为目前的制度允许宗教组织的妖兽们对诚实谋生的民众大大嘲弄一番。然而,正是在这里我才学到每一项法律都有两个“阐述”,一个是为富人,一个是为其他人。哦,这些妖兽正是制定和执行法律的人,异端审判至今仍在这个国家执行。

  这个关于爱国主义的教训让我花了超过四万元、10年的时间,也让我的退休账户重归于零。这令我首次认识到我生活的国家建立于以完全和完整的谎言为基础的意识形态上。这也令我认识到,不仅我自己多么天真无知,美国大众更是极端愚蠢,他们完全相信和接受有关他们所享受的“自由”的废话,他们还在继续这么做,对眼前的大量证据和持续发生的事视而不见。

  吃猫粮度日的老太
  让他明白资本主义的不公义

  在第一次学到正义在这个国家到底是什么的教训并试图从中复原前(那是在1984年左右,我完成工程学院的深造,但还需要至少五年时间才能“偿还欠帐”),我感到终于应该把握机会实践当一名独立工程师的梦想。

  谈到当一名工程师和独立自主的梦想,我要稍微离题一下,我肯定是从父亲那里遗传了有创意地解决问题的痴迷。我很小就认识到这一点。

  但关于独立自主的重要性,是很久之后,当我读大学时才认识到。当时我还只有十八九岁,以学生身份在宾夕法尼亚州哈里斯堡独立生活。我的邻居是一名老年退休妇女(对当年的我来说80岁以上看起来十分古老),她的退休钢铁工人丈夫已经去世。她的丈夫一辈子都在宾州中部的钢铁厂工作,大公司和工会向他承诺,30年工作的报酬是退休后可以享受退休金和医疗保险。结果他是数千个一无所有的人其中之一,因为领导无方的工厂和腐败的工会(更别提政府了)掠夺了他们的退休金和窃走了他们的退休福利。她只有依靠社会安全金为生。

  回想起来,那种情况颇为可笑,因为那时的我有几个月只能吃花生酱沾面包(或者可以奢侈一下时吃利斯牌Ritz饼干)。当我对她更了解和听说她的故事后,我对她的遭遇比我自己的更加难过(我,毕竟,我以为我未来会有一切)。有一次,当我们分享故事和同情彼此遭遇时,她以她祖母般的态度劝我吃猫粮,而不是依赖花生酱和面包,可以“更健康”(像她一样吃猫粮),我实实在在地感到震惊。我还不能那么做,但此事令我印象深刻。我下决心不能信任大公司来照顾我,我要为自己的未来和自身负责。

  新修订税法让他失去独立合约商身分,
  因被剥夺自由而四出游说,
  最终只发现政客不关心他的利益

  重回八零年代初,我以一个初出茅庐的合约软件工程师起步,情况很糟,两年后,多亏了骯脏的安达信会计公司高层(同样一批人日后带给我们安隆 Enron公司和其他同类灾难)的深夜幕后交易,以及同样骯脏的纽约联邦参议员(派卓克?摩尼汉),1986年税务改革法出炉,加入了1706节。

  如果你对此事不太熟悉的话,这里有一段国税局1706节的主要文字,对雇员(比如合约工程师)的税收政策作出定义。这段链接是参众两院联席会议的报告(http://www.synergistech.com/1706.shtml#ConferenceCommitteeReport),涉及如何正确阐述1706节,以及相关的修订后的530节。有关这些法规如何影响技术服务员工及其客户的信息,可参考我们对此的讨论? (http://www.synergistech.com/ic-taxlaw.shtml)。
  1706节:部分技术员工的论述?
  (a)概括—1978年税法530节修订,末尾加入以下新段:
  (d)例外—本节不适用于一名个人根据纳税人和另一人之间的协议,以工程师、设计师、制图人、电脑程序师、系统分析师或其他从事类似工作的类似技术工人身份为该人提供服务。
  (b)生效日期—本节修订内容对1986年12月31日后产生的酬劳和服务生效。
备注:
  “另一人”是传统意义上工作-店家关系中的客户。
  “纳税人”是招募方、经纪人、机构或店家。
  “个人”、“雇员”或“工人”是你。
  显然,你要阅读这一论述才明白这里说的是什么,但这并不复杂,底线是他们其实就可以把我的名字直接加入到(d)段中去。更进一步说,只有当他们索性站出来宣布我为一名罪犯或者非公民奴隶时,才比这个更为直接。二十年后,我仍然不能相信我所见。

  1987年间,我花了近五千元和至少1,000个小时,向任何一个可能听取我意见的参议员、众议员、州长或流氓写信、印刷和邮寄,没有人听我说,他们一致地将我视作是在浪费他们的时间。我在洛杉矶高速公路上花了无数时间,去开会、去参加任何和所有的无组织的专业人员小组,试图发起运动反对这一暴行。到头来却发现我们的努力很轻易地被几个弄权者轻易化解,他们正开始享受最新获得的“自由”带给他们的大量收入。哦,别忘了,我在这件事上花的时间,意味着我损失了向客户服务收费的收入。

  几个月的斗争下来,很明显此事不会有任何结果。我们辛苦奔波换来的最好结果是国税局代言人一段声明,称他们不会执行该条款(意即骚扰工程师和科学家)。这马上被证明是谎言,该段规章的出现开始影响到我的生计,当然,这本来就是其原意。

  再次,我的退休金计划被重新归零,而且就此停滞。如果我有任何理智的话,显然应该放弃我的工程师生涯而且永不回头。

 接受现实重新开始美式奋斗
  却再度沦为经济不景气的牺牲品

  反之,我开始繁忙工作,每周100个小时。随后洛杉矶遭遇了1990年代早期的经济不景气。我们的领袖决定他们不需要南加州的那些多余的空军基地,因此将它们关闭,就那么简单。结果是当地饱受经济打击,可以媲美于广为人知的德州储蓄及贷款业界震荡风潮。然而,因为这是政府造成的,没有人关心一下那些失去家园的年轻家庭,或者满街都是的被遗弃物业,而富有的贷款公司却得到政府资金去“巩固”其横财。我又一次损失了所有退休金。

  数年后,经历了一场离婚和不断奋力试图为我的事业打开一条生路后,我发现自己终能再次重新起步,但此时网络泡沫化和911噩梦来袭。我们的领袖决定所有航班停飞,历时几乎像是永恒,之后很长一段时间,“特别”机构如三藩市等数月维持在警戒状态。这令我和客户接触变得极端昂贵。讽刺的是,政府在这么做之后,将我们的数十亿元税款用于资助航空公司,一如既往,他们任由我自生自灭,但却用我的钱来援助他们富裕而无能的密友。这些事件发生后,我的生意就此停步,但还好不是我全部的退休金和储蓄。

  到了这个时候,我认为还是应该试试改变。告别加州,我来到了奥斯汀试试运气,却发现这个地方极端自以为是,很少有脚踏实地的工程师工作。我从未碰到过这么难找工作的时候,我的收入只有网络泡沫化之前的三分之一,因为这里的收费由当地三至四家大公司垄断决定,他们串通起来将价格和薪资拉低。而这之所以发生是因为司法机关受贿成风,毫不顾及服务任何人或任何事,只顾自己和其有钱的朋友。

  为了生存,我不得不靠着储蓄和退休金,最后一个是一笔很小的个人退休账户IRA的钱,当年我支出庞大而没有一分钱的收入。那年我没有报税,心想因为我没有收入,应该不需要报税。骯脏的政府却对此不同意。但他们没有及时通知我以便我能够提出法律挑战,当我试图入禀法庭申诉时,被告知无权获取公平法庭审讯待遇,因为申诉时限已过。正义就这样让我再次损失一万元。

  努力配合税法的要求
  无奈却在复杂税法中纠缠不清

  现在,我们终于言归当前。在我因生意破产与会计师接触过后,我发誓不会再踏入一个会计师办公室一步。但现在我有了一段新的婚姻,和一批未经申报的收入,以及一件新的业务资产:一架钢琴,我不知道该如何处理。经过深思熟虑,我决定不寻求专业协助是不负责任的做法。这是一大错误决定。 

  我们收到报税文件后我很乐观相信一切都上了正轨。我将所有这些年来的资料给了比尔罗斯,他给我的答案和我预料的很类似。唯一例外是他忽略了雪尔(编注:自白书作者太太)的未申报收入,总额$12,700。令事态更恶化的是,他一直知道这一遗漏,而直到他在核数过程中期对我指出前,我一无所知。但那时现实已经很残酷地摆在面前,他代表的是他自己的利益而不是我。

  这令我身处灾难中心,试图解释和税务无关的交易(至少和税务相关的交易的文件很不清楚)。这些事我一点不知情,而我的妻子不知道这些事会和任何人相关。结果……,看看周围吧。

  如他般勤奋工作的人终一无所有
  而有钱大户却在中产身上吸血

  我记得曾读过“大”萧条前股票市场崩盘的情况,那时一些富有的银行家和商人发现自己搞砸一切失去一切时跳楼自尽。这个国家六十年来走过的不是很讽刺吗,现在他们以为知道该如何解决这个小小的经济问题了,他们就直接从中产阶级(这些人没有任何发言权,选举是一场笑话)偷来财富来掩盖自己的错失,一切将会“照常营业”。现在富人们搞砸了,穷人们为此赔上性命……这可真是一个聪明利落的解决方案。

  谈到政府机关时,联邦航空署常被称为一个墓碑机构是合理的,但这不是唯一一个。最近的傀儡总统小布殊及其密友们在其八年执政期间肯定地向我们展示出,这一批评对所有政府机关都适用。如果不见尸体,不会出现改变(除非是政府里一些人的利益受到威胁)。当政府由上至下虚伪透顶,人命如同他们的谎言和自私自利的法律一样不值钱。

  我知道我肯定不是第一个已经忍无可忍的人。很奇怪的是,这个国家的人们早已停止为自由而死,不仅仅限于黑人和贫困的移民。我知道在我之前有无数人,之后还肯定有无数人。但我也知道,如果我不将自己加入尸体统计数的话,我只是确保不会有任何改变。我选择被“大佬”宰割时不再忍气吞声,我选择不再忽视身边发生的一切。我选择不再假装一切可以如常。我已经忍无可忍。

  我只希望这些数字会越来越多,不再被人遮盖和忽视,行尸走肉的美国人能够觉醒和抗争。除此以外没有他法。我只希望能冲击政府的神经,从而刺激(政客)双重标准的反射性反应,导致更多的愚蠢苛刻的限制时,民众终能醒悟,看清楚那些自负的政治流氓及其无知走狗的真面目。悲哀的是,虽然我花了一辈子试图相信情况并非如此,但暴力不仅是答案,而且是唯一的答案。这个残酷的笑话是,那些在最高层的废物们一直知道这些情况,一直在利用这种状况来愚弄和嘲笑着像我一样的蠢人。

  我曾读过这样的文字,疯狂的定义是一遍又一遍重复同一个程序并期待结果会突然不一样。我终于决心停止这样的疯狂了。好吧,国税局大佬先生们,让我们玩点新花样,收下我这磅肉,睡个好觉。

  对共产主义和资本主义下的总评

  共产主义信念:各尽所能,按需分配。
  资本主义信条:受骗者尽其劳,贪婪者取其利。

  约瑟·斯塔克(1956-2010)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

小孩眼泪何足道?老来叹息不轻松

http://bbs.creaders.net/child/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=451115&blog_id=55853

送交者: 飞云 2010年02月21日18:06:54 于 [儿童成长] 发送悄悄话

《让孩子自己去打拼》书摘

教育孩子的第一关键就是一个“早”字。

   教育起步越早,父母越轻松,孩子越成功。

  看到标题,读者可能会认为“从早”就是早早地把孩子送去学音乐、美术和早早地开始认字或者学算术等。技能方面,在有条件的情况下早一点儿把孩子送去学音乐、学美术等也未尝不可,但是我这里强调的重点是孩子的素质教育,包括自立能力、良好习惯以及气质修养的训练。学习方面,我不赞成另开小灶先于学校提前认字、读书或者学算术。关于这一点,我将在后面详细谈到。

   在谈“从早”之前,我先讲一个故事:

   2008年夏天我从美国回中国探望父母和兄弟姊妹。就在我准备返回美国的头一天晚上,中学时代的一个好朋友坚持要带他上高中的儿子来见我。这个朋友是我的高中同窗,目前在商业上已经小有成就。他的儿子上初中的时候学习成绩尚不错,现在痴迷上了电脑游戏,学习成绩一落千丈,朋友夫妻俩已经管不了孩子了。朋友气急了想动手教训儿子一番,可是据他自己说,他已经“打不过”已经长大的儿子了——儿子比他的力气还大。朋友于是想到让我来开导他的孩子。我推辞不掉,就和他的孩子进行了一番交谈。但是,私下里我和我的朋友说:“孩子已经这么大了,虽然不是无可救药,但我不得不对你说:今后你教育孩子的难度将相当大。你们很可能将不得不为你们长期娇惯孩子付出代价。”

   事实上类似的故事还相当多。

   许多父母习惯上总是认为:孩子还小,等大一点儿教育也不迟。还有的家长认为:船到桥头自然直,孩子长大就懂事了,自然会好。由于家庭经济条件相对于30年前在逐渐变好,也有不少家长对孩子的要求百依百顺,不愿让孩子受半点儿委屈。他们觉得这样就是爱孩子。

  我认为这样的想法和做法都是不妥当的。我母亲经常对我们兄弟姊妹说:“孩子还小?是的。不过孩子何年、何月、何日就算大了?”母亲的这个说法一直在我的记忆中挥之不去,我非常赞同。对于孩子长大了自然会变好的说法我也无法苟同。更严重的是很有可能变坏,而不是变好。

  为什么孩子教育越早越好,越迟越糟呢?第一个原因是:如果你由着孩子的性子,孩子逐渐就习以为常了,他(她)会认为事情本来就是那样,而且理所当然地就应该是那样。教育越拖后,孩子越认为你是在试图“改变”他(她),孩子可能会认为家长是和他(她)过不去,甚至认为父母已经不再爱他(她)了。外向点儿的孩子可能会说出他(她)的感受;内向的孩子则把他(她)的感受埋藏在心里。孩子再大点儿还会和父母发生冲突,父母往往会感到冤枉并且不知所措。

   我们不应去责备孩子,因为他们可能不明白为什么父母突然要他(她)作这些改变。虽然父母自认为有充足的理由。

  比如,上高中的孩子大手大脚地花惯了父母一直提供的零花钱。忽然有一天父母醒悟过来,感到这样做对孩子不好,或者发现孩子用钱不当,于是决定大大削减孩子的零花钱。可想而知,父母和孩子之间因此将要出现的冲突。如果冲突以父母妥协而告终,那么情况将更糟。父母在孩子面前的威信会受到严重损害,以后再想教育或“改变”孩子,势必难上加难。这就是前面提到的我的朋友和他儿子的故事。

为何要对孩子及早教育的第二个原因是:孩子小时候可塑性强,容易教,就像小树容易正,白纸上容易作画一样。

  女儿上幼儿园的第一天下午,我和妻子去幼儿园接她回家。门口有许多小贩兜售小孩爱吃的零食。那些小贩很精明,知道家长在孩子们的要求或哭闹下是一定会掏腰包的。他们手里举着花花绿绿的食品袋向孩子们晃动,口里念念有词:很好吃啊……女儿当然也不例外,要我们像其他家长一样给她买零食。我们没有答应,她就和我们闹,我们不为所动。我们给她讲道理,但似乎没有太大的效果。第二天下午,她还要我们买。我们依然如故,没有给她买。从第三天开始,孩子已经懂得:和我们要零食一定是白搭。从此,她再也没有向我们要过零食。然而当确实需要时,我们会主动给她买点儿小零食。从这件事儿上,她学习到:她不能想干什么就干什么,不能想要什么就有什么。她还学习到父母言出必行,没有讨价还价的余地。

  这个事例说明在孩子小的时候,在他(她)做第一二件事情的时候,往往就能一劳永逸地把他(她)教好。如果孩子在第一件事上和你讨价还价并赢得“胜利”,他(她)将立刻从中尝到甜头,并将学会如何和父母讨价还价并赢得一个又一个的“胜利”。父母的麻烦会越来越多,越来越大。到孩子上初中和高中时,父母将很可能面对一个桀骜不驯的孩子,那时候父母将会感到头痛不已。

   人们常说:“有再一再二,没有再三再四。”这种说法往往是父母们迁就孩子毛病和不逊的托词。事实上,在教育孩子上我们应该记住:没有再一再二,更无再三再四。

   万事开头难,对孩子的第一、第二次,父母可能嫌麻烦或棘手而采取鸵鸟战术;但是鸵鸟战术将会招致更多、更大的烦恼。因此,对孩子必须直面“初战”,而且“初战”必须获胜。

   如果孩子已经比较大了(比如初中的孩子)父母才意识到这个问题的重要,我认为父母可以和孩子谈心、讲清楚,然后再采取上述做法并保持连贯性,孩子依然可以转过弯来。

  女儿的另一个故事也很有意思。她四五岁的时候,我们住在省博物馆院内。她经常和几个小朋友在院内来回奔跑玩耍。我看到他们跑在土路上扬起大量灰尘,就对她说:“你可以绕着砖铺的路跑,那样就不会弄脏你的鞋子和衣服。玩完后也就不会把脏土带回家。”孩子答应一声就又玩去了。其实我并没有把它太当回事儿,令我高兴的是,我随后发现即使跑砖路需要绕几个直角,孩子也总是跑在砖路上。就这样点点滴滴的,孩子轻而易举地养成了讲卫生、守规矩的习惯,而且她懂得为什么要那样做。

  及早教育孩子的第三个原因是:孩子小时候培养了好习惯、高素质,长大后会显得特别得体、自然、高雅,而且这习惯和素质将伴随他(她)的一生,使他(她)终生受益。坏习惯和低素质长大后也会自然流露,使人或显得粗鄙,或显得懒散;坏习惯和低素质甚至能毁了孩子的前程。有的坏毛病到孩子长大时已习惯成自然,终身难改且不自知,深受其害而浑然不觉。虽然孩子长大以后能够认识并改掉许多坏习惯,但是改过来的好习惯和从小养成的好习惯是不同的。长大后改过的习惯不自然、造作;经常会给人以虚假和做作的感觉。另外,长大后改习惯,自己会感到疲惫、感到累。有的人会因此而避免与人交往,避免社交活动甚至变得内向。显而易见,由此很可能带来孩子成人后工作上和生活上的挫折。俗话说:三辈子穿衣、五辈子吃饭。这一方面说明传统教育的重要,另一方面说明了教育的难度。其实如果父母对孩子多加关注、多用点儿心,好习惯、高素质并非高不可攀。

虽然长大以后成功改变自己的不乏其人,然而当我们知道了从小培养教育的重要和好处后,我们为什么要冒那个风险呢?

技能技巧的培养,比如美术、音乐等,有条件也可以及早进行,不过一定要量力而行,不宜跟风。如果能发现孩子的特长所在,最好扬长避短学习孩子擅长和喜欢的,这样才能事半功倍。强行逼着孩子学习自己不喜欢特别是不擅长的技能,不仅事倍功半且容易造成孩子厌学,失去对学习的兴趣。失去了兴趣,基本上就失去了成功的可能。

  另外很重要的一点是,素质、技能和技巧的培养要从细微处做起。我们每个人或多或少都有过这样的经历:当我们出席一个比较庄重的场合的时候,我们有时会很担心某个细节会出错而贻笑大方。举一个比较极端的例子:大约在20世纪80年代的某天,我曾经在国内一个正式的场合看见一个身着西服领带的临时接待员,感觉有点儿别扭,原来他的衬衫竟然在裤子外面。我觉得这和我们这代人从小不注意衣着有关,如果从小接受过正式的和良好的家庭训练,那种低级错误是无论如何也不会发生的。

   窥一斑而见全豹,木桶的盛水量是由最低的那块木板决定的。所以,某种程度上说从细节上可以看出一个人的素质来。这就要求我们教育孩子不仅要及早开始,而且必须从细微处做起。

Monday, February 22, 2010

女孩们可以吸取的教训--中国第一车模

21日上午,网上流传一段被称为“”的视频,内容为该女模特与男友的亲密镜头,尺度大胆,从画面看,应属自拍。据悉,女模艺名“兽兽”,真名翟凌,该视频内容被疑是其前男友遭弃后报复行为。

21 日晚,一网友署名“翟凌”在国内知名论坛发贴“兽兽个人声明”,在该帖中,她“就近期某些人在网络上出现的诋毁、诽谤我个人名誉一事,正式发表个人声明”,并声称:“对于网络上某些人针对本人的恶意诽谤、人身攻击,本人不发表任何评价,但本人将保留追究发帖人法律责任的权利。”在帖子里,她并没有否认或承认视频的真实性。

有网友留言称,看过视频,确实是她本人无疑。也有网友怀疑,这是女模自我炒作的手段,故意用性爱视频博出位。

【兽兽个人声明】

本人翟凌是一名普通的模特,现本人就近期某些人在网络上出现的诋毁、诽谤我个人名誉一事,正式发表个人声明如下:

1、本人作为一名普通的模特,一向以为广大观众带来美丽为工作的目标,并努力实现。

2、对于网络上某些人针对本人的恶意诽谤、人身攻击,本人不发表任何评价,但本人将保留追究发帖人法律责任的权利。

3、任何人如继续转载这些不实内容,必将对本人包括名誉权在内的公民人身权利构成严重侵害。本人对相关网络对于公民人权的漠视深感遗憾。

本人在此郑重声明:某些人如继续对本人恶意诽谤、人身攻击,本人将对造谣诽谤者行使法律赋予的权力,通过法律手段维护本人的合法权益。

关于事件女主角:兽兽

中文名:翟凌

家乡:中国山东

性别:女

血型:AB型

生日:1987年8月18日

身高:177厘米

体重:50公斤

三围:85 60 85

星座:狮子座

职业:模特

粉丝称谓:兽丝

毕业院校:大连轻工业学院服装表演专业

她的经历——

2005年“中国内衣模特大赛”总决赛亚军,时尚魅力奖

2006年“丝绸之路国际模特大赛”中国赛区总决赛季军,十佳模特

2006年“中韩超模大赛晋级赛”入围

2006年 中国内衣模特大赛亚军

2008(第十届)北京国际汽车展览会“兆牌杯”汽车模特大赛亚军,而2008年北京车展是她第一次参加的大型国际车展

事件男主角:“没起子”杨迪

毕业于北京电影学院,专业摄影师。“兽兽”真正的由来就是“没起子”给她起的一个小名,全名是碧水金晶兽。

兽兽门的五点血泪教训,给女孩儿们

07年做一个节目主持的时候,前后共来过大概30名美女模特嘉宾,一天一位。其中有三位印象给我特别深刻。

一位叫赵晨池,长得在她们圈子里不算最漂亮那种,但是有着一张很容易被人记住的脸。话说这姑娘说话非常有礼貌,一看就是家教出身良好的女孩,聊的时候竟然变戏法地送了一根足球棒棒糖给我。在这里需要说一下,我和她素不相识,也就是单单这一场节目聊天而已,嘉宾完全没有必要送我任何礼物。而且当初聊的节目是足球,足见她是用了心准备这份礼物的。我当时就想:冲这女孩的为人,她也必红无疑。后来她的qq空间流量过亿,红得不得了。另外一位叫乌兰托雅,长得是最惊艳的一位,男人女人看了都喜欢的那种。小姑娘不怎么说话,有点害羞,看得出怯生生的。后来好像也挺红的,确实长得太漂亮了。

还有一位,就是兽兽了。本来当时我对她印象并不深,因为她那时应该是刚刚出道,时间是07年6月左右吧,没什么特点。后来07年底上某个SNS网站时不知道怎么加上了,我很开心地和她打招呼说你好呀,还记得我不?她有点傲慢地回了句,原话我记不清了,大意是问你是谁啊,语气让人不是很舒服。然后我想大概她把我和她的无聊追求者弄混了吧。就说我是xx节目当时的主持人啊,你x年x月x日来过我节目的,还带了一张合照给她。然后她表示知道了,好像是说了声哦就没下文了。后来我没有和她再说话。

这是首页推荐的 另一个模特写的关于她的一些事,从中可以看出来,这个女孩可能脾气确实不是那么好相处的。所以她被前前男友爆艳照,被前男友英雄救美然后又闹翻,然后向前男友索要超出经济条件的cartier戒指,怒骂男友母亲,最后流落街头,前男友“没起子”不甘心,爆出曾经有艳照这么一档子事,结果被网友人肉搜索出了她的视频(当然不排除“没起子”参与曝光视频的可能性)。这一系列事情都是互为因果的:如果她没有那么桀骜的脾气和性格,前前男友可能就不会患得患失地拍她的私密照作为留念;如果她好好分手而不是刺激到对方,私密照也就不会被发出来;要是和现在的男友好好相处,这事也就没人提了;要是没有怒骂现男友母亲,而是和平分手,男友没准不会说出当初英雄救美的事,网友也不会去搜索,让过去那么久的事闹得现在这么沸沸扬扬。

这事已经占据了各大头条,谷歌热门词的前十名几乎全是相关文字。从这件事情中,

女孩们可以吸取的教训如下:

1.提防要拍你私密照的男人。一个男人如果拍你的私密照,脑子里一定是觉得他不可能永远和你在一起的,所以要拍下来以备日后留念。而这种怀着患得患失的心态的男人,最容易和你翻脸翻旧账。

2.你现在的男友不是老公,不是所有的男人都叫谢霆锋。他不一定能对你的一辈子负责,所以请在你觉得不适的任何时候回绝让你不舒服的请求。比如可能损伤你身体的无保护措施的性爱、比如拍艳照……

3.要拍照留念的话,别拍脸。视频中很容易看出来那个男人是拍了私部又有意拍她的面部,我相信她以前是看过的,但竟然没有事后将它删除,不知道是出于何种心态?我一看就觉得这男人险恶。

4.分手要好好分,不要翻脸。爱过就不要说对方的坏话,给大家彼此留一点余地。即使你确实爱慕虚荣,也不要在金钱或者性能力等方面刺激对方,免得踩到对方痛脚,做出伤害你的过激行为。要知道,女人在性方面永远是弱者。

5.即使前男友不传播,但也可能不止一个人会看到。以前有个朋友没事自拍了几张留念,然后第二天相机被偷了。所幸她并不漂亮也没有拍脸。不然后果不堪设想。

Mixed blessing: credit card reform

Mixed blessing: credit card reform may shock some
New credit card law restricts bank tactics, but sent interest rates up and credit lines down

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/Mixed-blessing-credit-card-apf-2338521177.html?x=0

By Eileen Aj Connelly, AP Personal Finance Writer , On Sunday February 21, 2010, 2:29 pm EST
NEW YORK (AP) -- Your next credit card statement is going to contain an ugly truth: how much that card really costs to use.

Now, thanks to a long-awaited law that goes into effect Monday, you'll know that if you pay the minimum on a $3,000 balance with a 14 percent interest rate, it could take you 10 years to pay off.

"Jaws will drop," said David Robertson, publisher of The Nilson Report, a newsletter that tracks the industry. "I don't doubt for a nanosecond that it's going to give a lot of people a sinking feeling in their stomachs."

That's not all that will make them queasy.

During the past nine months, credit card companies jacked up interest rates, created new fees and cut credit lines. They also closed down millions of accounts. So a law hailed as the most sweeping piece of consumer legislation in decades has helped make it more difficult for millions of Americans to get credit, and made that credit more expensive.

It wasn't supposed to be this way. The law that President Barack Obama signed last May shields card users from sudden interest rate hikes, excessive fees and other gimmicks that card companies have used to drive up profits. Consumers will save at least $10 billion a year from curbs on interest rate increases alone, according to the Pew Charitable Trust, which tracks credit card issues.

But there was a catch. Card companies had nine months to prepare while certain rules were clarified by the Federal Reserve. They used that time to take actions that ended up hurting the same customers who were supposed to be helped.

Consumer advocates say the law still offers important protections for the users of some 1.4 billion credit cards.

"We expected some rate increases; we expected some annual fees," said Ed Mierzwinski of the U.S. Public Interest Research Group, an advocacy organization that lobbied for the law.

To be sure, the law takes effect while credit card companies are still reeling from the recession.

In 2007, the top 12 card issuers earned a combined $19 billion from credit cards, according to The Nilson Report. A year later, amid the financial meltdown, profits for those companies fell more than 65 percent to $6.32 billion. The plunge was largely because defaults ballooned as unemployment soared.

Profit figures for 2009 aren't yet available. But banks wrote off about $35 billion in credit card debt last year, as the unemployment rate topped 10 percent. Analysts predict the default rate will remain at least twice as high as normal through this year, and longer if unemployment stays high.

At the same time, the law is expected to cut into future profits. FICO Inc., the company best known for its credit scores, projects the average card will generate less than $100 a month in revenue within three years, down from $200 a month before the law.

That helps explain why the industry reacted so aggressively to the legislation. Among the moves it made:

-- Resurrected annual fees.

Annual fees, common until about 10 years ago, have made a comeback. During the final three months of last year, 43 percent of new offers for credit cards contained annual fees, versus 25 percent in the same period a year earlier, according to Mintel International, which tracks marketing data. Several banks also added these fees to existing accounts. One example: Many Citigroup customers will start paying a $60 annual fee on April 1.

-- Created new fees and raised old ones.

These include a $1 processing fee for paper statements for cards issued by stores such as Victoria's Secret and Ann Taylor. Another example is a $19 inactivity fee Fifth Third Bank now charges customers who haven't used their card for six months.

Other banks increased existing fees. JPMorgan Chase, for instance raised the cost of balance transfers from one card to another to 5 percent of the transfer from 3 percent.

-- Raised interest rates.

The average rate offered for a new card climbed to 13.6 percent last week, from 10.7 percent during the same week a year ago -- meaning cardholders had to pay almost 30 percent more in interest, according to Bankrate.com.

For millions of other accounts, variable interest rates that can rise with the market replaced fixed rates. The Fed is expected to start raising its benchmark interest rates later this year, which would likely trigger an increase on those cards.

Besides making credit more expensive, banks also made it harder to get and keep credit cards. One big reason: Since the financial meltdown, many credit card issuers have been trying to reduce risk.

The number of Visa, MasterCard and American Express cards in circulation dropped 15 percent in 2009, for example. Rarely used cards were among the first cut off. Some cards linked to rewards programs for purchases like gasoline were likewise shut down.

Card companies also slashed credit limits for millions of accounts that remain open. About 40 percent of banks cut credit lines on existing accounts, according to the consultant TowerGroup, which estimated that such moves eliminated about $1 trillion in available credit. Much of that was unused.

Credit lines were frequently cut in regions most affected by the housing crisis and high unemployment, such as Florida and California, said Curt Beaudouin, a senior analyst at Moody's Investors Service. "They're not doing it willy nilly, they're doing it systematically," he said.

Companies are also making fewer solicitations. Mailed offers for new cards increased in the final three months of 2009 for the first time in two years, but there were only about 575 million. That's about a third of the average number of quarterly offers from 2000 through 2008, according to Mintel.

Because the law makes credit cards less profitable, some subprime borrowers may not be able to get cards at all, at least for the next few years. There's no fixed definition, but subprime borrowers generally have a FICO score below 660. For a good portion of this group, options may be limited to alternatives like PayPal and other electronic payment services, prepaid cards and payday lenders.

"Not everyone either deserves or should have an open-ended credit card," said Roger C. Hochschild, chief operating officer of Discover Financial Services.

Joining those who won't easily get cards: college students and others under age 21. The law strictly limits card marketing on campuses, ending giveaways like T-shirts and pizza Cards can only be granted to applicants who show they have the means to repay, or those who have a co-signer who can pay.

"Some of the more vulnerable parts of the population are a little bit more protected," said Georgetown University finance professor James Angel. But he predicts card companies will find ways around most of the new restrictions. And once the economy recovers, he expects the lending spigot to open again.

In the meantime, there is one group of consumers that banks will chase after -- those who carry a balance from month to month for at least part of the year, and pay their bills on time. They're the most profitable and least risky group for banks.

Also a target customer: anyone willing to do more business with the bank that issues their card, say opening a checking or savings account or taking out a mortgage.

"What we want is a deeper relationship with our customers," said Andy Rowe, an executive vice president with Bank of America's card business. Customers willing to stick with a single bank may even be able to get annual fees waived or get a better interest rate, he said. "That's where the competition will be."

Sunday, February 21, 2010

灰太郎:中国父母最容易犯的十大错误

http://bbs.creaders.net/child/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=450860

送交者: 灰太郎 2010年02月20日23:00:41 于 [儿童成长] 发送悄悄话

1)让保姆,爷爷奶奶带孩子。不自己亲自照顾。很多中国父母以为孩子只要身边有人看著,没有生命危险就好。其实从出生开始,孩子就需要和别人交流。我们很多家庭的孩子,是在没有关注的环境下长大。脑子会变得怪异呆滞。然后永远缺乏爱的安全感。

2)把孩子当炫耀比较的对象。 中国人一方面爱面子,一方面想鼓励孩子上进。常常说,你看人家孩子多用功,成绩多好。人家又得了什么奖。你每一次把孩子和别人比,只带给他多一份不满和痛苦。对于事情没有什么帮助。 这种比较和竞争的心里,也导致中国人团体比较无法和谐合作做事。喜欢互斗。否则中国人的团队合作永远不如人。

3)不尊重孩子的隐私和权利。 很多父母抱著传统的观念,把父母摆在权威的角色。认为子女是属于父母的。这种不把孩子当一个拥有完整权利个体的错误观念,导致个人和社会的很多不良的后果。这种尊重的精神是我们社会所缺乏的。导致社会缺乏服务和尊重的观念。不被尊重的人以后也不知道尊重别人。

4) 把孩子塑造成自己想要的方向。 很多父母把自己一生的遗憾寄托在孩子身上。一直逼孩子往自己以为是正确的路走。 即使孩子并不适合,或者不喜欢。当子女长大回想起童年,尽是不快乐的回忆。的确是些愚蠢父母的作为。

5)把学校成绩当成一切表现的指标。认为越用功越好。 很多父母愚蠢地以为学校的成绩代表一切。人生的目标两个,一是高考,二是留学。 目标订清楚了。父母剩下的工作,就是用一切威逼利诱苦肉哀求,来达到这个目的。学校的成绩并不代表一切。反而是全面的能力,活力,毅力,性格,才是影响他们一生的重要因素。

6)认为早起很好。 睡觉就是懒惰。 成长中孩子需要充分的睡眠。睡不足会影响发育。脑力会减退。我们的孩子需要充分的睡眠。全国违法让孩子在周末学习或晚睡觉的教育人士应该用严厉的法律措施来禁止。  

7) 认为孩子不应该做家事,应该把时间拿来学习。社会学家调查的结果,在家常做家事的孩子将来生活比较幸福。可能是因为处理事情的能力比较强。所以长大以后比较不容易有挫折。或者比较能面对挫折。中国的父母为了让孩子学习,剥夺了一切孩子做家事的机会。剥夺了他学习工作,学习分担责任,学习面对问题的机会。教养出一个个只会解几题数学(又解不好)的傻孩子。

8) 缺乏幽默感和轻松的一面。 或许因为各种压力,家庭的基本气氛就是逼孩子学习。父母因为生活压力,失去了幽默感,失去了轻松。一切都是逼,都是赶,都是高考。实在不知道人活著是为什么。

9) 认为父母的爱可以是对子女任何不合理要求的借口。 男女之间,爱并不是为一切所欲为的借口。或许因为电视剧演太多了。很多人以为爱就可以当一切的借口。很多父母常对子女说的一句话:我们这样做,也是因为爱你,为你好啊。 想用这句话堵住子女的反驳。这简直荒谬。要求不合理就是不合理。别把爱扯进来当挡箭牌。父母的要求应该要合理。让孩子心服口服。

10)认为养孩子是坚苦的义务,不是享受。 中国父母,经过传统的教育,习惯把养育儿女当成艰苦的义务。也因为这个苦,而常常暗示或明示子女要回报,孝顺。比较正确的态度是养孩子是一种上天赐予的享受。应该享受和子女相处的时光。享受看著他成长的乐趣。

Friday, February 19, 2010

美股近十年,赢家输家大评比(下)

http://finance.creaders.net/newsViewer.php?nid=421384&id=962233

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Quote123 2010-02-18 10:44:32


华尔街日报的文章指出,二十一世纪的第一个十年,是美国股市历史纪载两百年以来表现最差的时期。这是一个令人震惊的说法,但是有统计数据支持这样的结论。因为从 1999年年底开始,纽约证券交易所的行情价值每年平均以0.5%的幅度下降。

1999年12月31日至2009年12月29日,道琼斯工业指数下跌8.3%,标准普尔 500下跌23.3%,而以科技股为主的纳斯达克则下跌了43.8%。然而这些数据仅是一个广泛的平均值,由於平均值皆是来自於两个极端,专家建议,不妨综览过去股市十年间表现最好的赢家与最差的输家,最为2010年投资的参考。

这份清单让投资人一方面看着成功的案例,一方面从失败的故事中记取教训。在这些教训中,有几家企业也许没能生存到二十一世纪的第二个十年,但是他们的故事却成了投资人最好的借镜。

美股十大输家

1、通用汽车 (General Motors)

1999年12月31日每股价格:72.69美元。
今日价格:2009年6月1日通用汽车宣告破产,以每股75美分的价格暂停交易。
通用汽车2009年宣告破产之前,该公司已在颠颇的路途上挣扎多时,高额的员工健保费用、沉重的养老金与债务负担、同时又未能成功开发出广受欢迎样式新颖的车款。经历一番挣扎,通用汽车根据破产法第十一章规定,向美国曼哈顿破产法庭申请破产保护。该公司的失败象徵着底特律的落没,也宣告中国做为世界上最大汽车市场的到来。

2、雷曼兄弟 (Lehman Brothers)

1999年12月31日每股价格:20.89美元。
今日价格:2008年9月15日雷曼兄弟倒闭以每股15美分的价格停止交易,并被巴克莱银行进行收购。
雷曼兄弟的倒闭被看作是美国金融体系一次恐慌的高点。当该公司的股价以自由落体的速度跌落时,它无法说服华尔街投资银行同业或联邦政府向它伸出援手,最後巴克莱公司收购雷曼兄弟部份资产,出价仅有 17.5亿美元。

3、全国金融 (Countrywide Financial)

1999年12月31日每股价格:31.00美元。
今日价格:当2008年1月11日美国银行宣布以41亿美元收购该公司时,全国金融的股价狂跌至美股1.04美元。

4、美国银行 (Bank of America)

1999年12月31日每股价格:25.09美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:15.18美元
净减:39%
虽然利用股票市场任何测量方式来看,美国银行都不会是这十年来表现最差的一股,但是该公司基於一些特殊的理由,仍被视为这一波金融灾难中侥幸存活下来的企业。它现在拥有全国金融和美林证券的业务,目前也逐渐步上正轨,慢慢恢复成长,但是美银受损的声誉还有待时间补救。

5、波士顿科技 (Boston Scientific)

1999年12月31日每股价格:10.94美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:8.84美元
净减:19.3%
波士顿科技登上了这份名单,因为它在过去十年内,表现可谓是大起又大落。该公司在二十一世纪初期股价就翻了三、四倍,到了2004年每股接近46美元。但是,波士顿科技面临的法律问题接踵而来,其中包括一项牵涉到四亿三千一百万美元的专利侵权判决,再加上同业竞争日趋激烈,使这个医疗设备制造商考验不断。

6、Sprint Nextel

1999年12月31日每股价格:64.08美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:3.69美元
净减:94.3%
2005年Sprint与 Nextel合并,对抗他们的竞争对手时代华纳公司与 AOL的合作,人们普遍认为,这是历史上最糟糕的企业合作案例之一。两家公司合并後,他们面临了技术问题、硬件问题、网络问题,而两家公司的企业文化未能有效融合,激发出更好的火花,这无疑是将客户推向更远的地方。而他们对于巩固现有网络的努力,也因电信部门的江河日下,被强劲的竞争对手一一超越。

7、纽约时报 (New York Times)

1999年12月31日每股价格:49.12美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:12.09美元
净减:75.1%
作为媒体巨头之一,让纽约时报登上这份名单似乎不太公平,只因为该公司没有在互联网时代里,开发出成功的商业模式,以至於股价大跌。但是更大的问题是,苏兹贝格家族拥有专营权後,几项计划和举动招致了外界严厉的批评,其中包括不成功的收购,建盖昂贵的新总部,以及新闻内容方面的丑闻,都对于纽时这个品牌造成不小打击。

8、柯达公司 (Eastman Kodak)

1999年12月31日每股价格:66.25美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:4.29美元
净减:93.5%
过去相机、相纸为柯达赚来的钱,在数位摄影时代已经荡然无存。

9、普尔特房屋 (Pulte Homes)

1999年12月31日每股价格:56.2美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:9.88美元
净减:75.5%
长期投资者也许仍然在跟进住宅建筑股,但同一时刻,普尔特和其他上市交易的同业,却也象徵了次及贷款和过度扩张的後果。在2005年房市火热的高峰期,这些股票扶摇直上狂涨736%,却没有人即时喊出刹车。对於持股人来说,毫无规范以及盲目的管理确实是很糟糕的示范。

10、MBIA

1999年12月31日每股价格:35.23美元
2009年12月28日收盘价:4.16美元
净减:88.3%
市政公债保险也许是极度平稳以及枯燥的业务,但是如果MBIA有所坚持,而非转向风险更高、难以估价的抵押贷款证券业务,它的股东如今将享有稳定并丰硕的回报,而不是一场混乱。

Thursday, February 18, 2010

最后呐喊:撞击奥斯汀国税大楼飞行员的话

MND has obtained a copy of the letter left by Joe Stack, the pilot who this morning flew his plane into an IRS building in Austin, Texas. We have reproduced it here in full…



  If you’re reading this, you’re no doubt asking yourself, “Why did this have to
happen?” The simple truth is that it is complicated and has been coming for a long time. The writing process, started many months ago, was intended to be therapy in the face of the looming realization that there isn’t enough therapy in the world that can fix what is really broken. Needless to say, this rant could fill volumes with example after example if I would let it. I find the process of writing it frustrating, tedious, and probably pointless… especially given my gross inability to gracefully articulate my thoughts in light of the storm raging in my head. Exactly what is therapeutic about that I’m not sure, but desperate times call for desperate measures. We are all taught as children that without laws there would be no society, only anarchy.

  Sadly, starting at early ages we in this country have been brainwashed to believe that, in return for our dedication and service, our government stands for justice for all. We are further brainwashed to believe that there is freedom in this place, and that we should be ready to lay our lives down for the noble principals represented by its founding fathers. Remember? One of these was “no taxation without representation”. I have spent the total years of my adulthood unlearning that crap from only a few years of my childhood. These days anyone who really stands up for that principal is promptly labeled a “crackpot”, traitor and worse. While very few working people would say they haven’t had their fair share of taxes (as can I), in my lifetime I can say with a great degree of certainty that there has never been a politician cast a vote on any matter with the likes of me or my interests in mind. Nor, for that matter, are they the least bit interested in me or anything I have to say.

  Why is it that a handful of thugs and plunderers can commit unthinkable atrocities (and in the case of the GM executives, for scores of years) and when it’s time for their gravy train to crash under the weight of their gluttony and overwhelming stupidity, the force of the full federal government has no difficulty coming to their aid within days if not hours? Yet at the same time, the joke we call the American medical system, including the drug and insurance companies, are murdering tens of thousands of people a year and stealing from the corpses and victims they cripple, and this country’s leaders don’t see this as important as bailing out a few of their vile, rich cronies. Yet, the political “representatives” (thieves, liars, and self-serving scumbags is far more accurate) have endless time to sit around for year after year and debate the state of the “terrible health care problem”. It’s clear they see no crisis as long as the dead people don’t get in the way of their corporate profits rolling in. And justice? You’ve got to be kidding!

  How can any rational individual explain that white elephant conundrum in the middle of our tax system and, indeed, our entire legal system? Here we have a system that is, by far, too complicated for the brightest of the master scholars to understand. Yet, it mercilessly “holds accountable” its victims, claiming that they’re responsible for fully complying with laws not even the experts understand. The law “requires” a signature on the bottom of a tax filing; yet no one can say truthfully that they understand what they are signing; if that’s not “duress” than what is. If this is not the measure of a totalitarian regime, nothing is.

  How did I get here?

  My introduction to the real American nightmare starts back in the early ‘80s. Unfortunately after more than 16 years of school, somewhere along the line I picked up the absurd, pompous notion that I could read and understand plain English. Some friends introduced me to a group of people who were having ‘tax code’ readings and discussions. In particular, zeroed in on a section relating to the wonderful “exemptions” that make institutions like the vulgar, corrupt Catholic Church so incredibly wealthy. We carefully studied the law (with the help of some of the “best”, high-paid, experienced tax lawyers in the business), and then began to do exactly what the “big boys” were doing (except that we weren’t steeling from our congregation or lying to the government about our massive profits in the name of God). We took a great deal of care to make it all visible, following all of the rules, exactly the way the law said it was to be done.

  The intent of this exercise and our efforts was to bring about a much-needed reevaluation of the laws that allow the monsters of organized religion to make such a mockery of people who earn an honest living. However, this is where I learned that there are two “interpretations” for every law; one for the very rich, and one for the rest of us… Oh, and the monsters are the very ones making and enforcing the laws; the inquisition is still alive and well today in this country.

  That little lesson in patriotism cost me $40,000+, 10 years of my life, and set my retirement plans back to 0. It made me realize for the first time that I live in a country with an ideology that is based on a total and complete lie. It also made me realize, not only how naive I had been, but also the incredible stupidity of the American public; that they buy, hook, line, and sinker, the crap about their “freedom”… and that they continue to do so with eyes closed in the face of overwhelming evidence and all that keeps happening in front of them.

  Before even having to make a shaky recovery from the sting of the first lesson on what justice really means in this country (around 1984 after making my way through engineering school and still another five years of “paying my dues”), I felt I finally had to take a chance of launching my dream of becoming an independent engineer. On the subjects of engineers and dreams of independence, I should digress somewhat to say that I’m sure that I inherited the fascination for creative problem solving from my father. I realized this at a very young age.

  The significance of independence, however, came much later during my early years of college; at the age of 18 or 19 when I was living on my own as student in an apartment in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. My neighbor was an elderly retired woman (80+ seemed ancient to me at that age) who was the widowed wife of a retired steel worker. Her husband had worked all his life in the steel mills of central Pennsylvania with promises from big business and the union that, for his 30 years of service, he would have a pension and medical care to look forward to in his retirement. Instead he was one of the thousands who got nothing because the incompetent mill management and corrupt union (not to mention the government) raided their pension funds and stole their retirement. All she had was social security to live on.

  In retrospect, the situation was laughable because here I was living on peanut butter and bread (or Ritz crackers when I could afford to splurge) for months at a time. When I got to know this poor figure and heard her story I felt worse for her plight When I got to know this poor figure and heard her story I felt worse for her plight than for my own (I, after all, I thought I had everything to in front of me). I was genuinely appalled at one point, as we exchanged stories and commiserated with each other over our situations, when she in her grandmotherly fashion tried to convince me that I would be “healthier” eating cat food (like her) rather than trying to get all my substance from peanut butter and bread. I couldn’t quite go there, but the impression was made. I decided that I didn’t trust big business to take care of me, and that I would take responsibility for my own future and myself.

  Return to the early ‘80s, and here I was off to a terrifying start as a ‘wet-behind-theears’ contract software engineer… and two years later, thanks to the fine backroom, midnight effort by the sleazy executives of Arthur Andersen (the very same folks who later brought us Enron and other such calamities) and an equally sleazy New York Senator (Patrick Moynihan), we saw the passage of 1986 tax reform act with its section 1706.

  For you who are unfamiliar, here is the core text of the IRS Section 1706, defining the treatment of workers (such as contract engineers) for tax purposes. Visit this link for a conference committee report (http://www.synergistech.com/1706.shtml#ConferenceCommitteeReport) regarding the intended interpretation of Section 1706 and the relevant parts of Section 530, as amended. For information on how these laws affect technical services workers and their clients, read our discussion here (http://www.synergistech.com/ic-taxlaw.shtml).

  SEC. 1706. TREATMENT OF CERTAIN TECHNICAL PERSONNEL. (a) IN GENERAL – Section 530 of the Revenue Act of 1978 is amended by adding at the end thereof the following new subsection: (d) EXCEPTION. – This section shall not apply in the case of an individual who pursuant to an arrangement between the taxpayer and another person, provides services for such other person as an engineer, designer, drafter, computer programmer, systems analyst, or other similarly skilled worker engaged in a similar line of work. (b) EFFECTIVE DATE. – The amendment made by this section shall apply to remuneration paid and services rendered after December 31, 1986.

  Note:

  ! “another person” is the client in the traditional job-shop relationship.

  ! “taxpayer” is the recruiter, broker, agency, or job shop.

  ! “individual”, “employee”, or “worker” is you.

  Admittedly, you need to read the treatment to understand what it is saying but it’s not very complicated. The bottom line is that they may as well have put my name right in the text of section (d). Moreover, they could only have been more blunt if they would have came out and directly declared me a criminal and non-citizen slave. Twenty years later, I still can’t believe my eyes.

  During 1987, I spent close to $5000 of my ‘pocket change’, and at least 1000 hours of my time writing, printing, and mailing to any senator, congressman, governor, or slug that might listen; none did, and they universally treated me as if I was wasting their time. I spent countless hours on the L.A. freeways driving to meetings and any and all of the disorganized professional groups who were attempting to mount a campaign against this atrocity. This, only to discover that our efforts were being easily derailed by a few moles from the brokers who were just beginning to enjoy the windfall from the new declaration of their “freedom”. Oh, and don’t forget, for all of the time I was spending on this, I was loosing income that I couldn’t bill clients. After months of struggling it had clearly gotten to be a futile exercise. The best we could get for all of our trouble is a pronouncement from an IRS mouthpiece that they weren’t going to enforce that provision (read harass engineers and scientists). This immediately proved to be a lie, and the mere existence of the regulation began to have its impact on my bottom line; this, of course, was the intended effect. Again, rewind my retirement plans back to 0 and shift them into idle.

  If I had any sense, I clearly should have left abandoned engineering and never looked back. Instead I got busy working 100-hour workweeks. Then came the L.A. depression of the early 1990s. Our leaders decided that they didn’t need the all of those extra Air Force bases they had in Southern California, so they were closed; just like that. The result was economic devastation in the region that rivaled the widely publicized Texas S&L fiasco. However, because the government caused it, no one gave a shit about all of the young families who lost their homes or street after street of boarded up houses abandoned to the wealthy loan companies who received government funds to “shore up” their windfall. Again, I lost my retirement.

  Years later, after weathering a divorce and the constant struggle trying to build some momentum with my business, I find myself once again beginning to finally pick up some speed. Then came the .COM bust and the 911 nightmare. Our leaders decided that all aircraft were grounded for what seemed like an eternity; and long after that, ‘special’ facilities like San Francisco were on security alert for months. This made access to my customers prohibitively expensive. Ironically, after what they had done the Government came to the aid of the airlines with billions of our tax dollars … as usual they left me to rot and die while they bailed out their rich, incompetent cronies WITH MY MONEY! After these events, there went my business but not quite yet all of my retirement and savings.

  By this time, I’m thinking that it might be good for a change. Bye to California, I’ll try Austin for a while. So I moved, only to find out that this is a place with a highly inflated sense of self-importance and where damn little real engineering work is done. I’ve never experienced such a hard time finding work. The rates are 1/3 of what I was earning before the crash, because pay rates here are fixed by the three or four large companies in the area who are in collusion to drive down prices and wages… and this happens because the justice department is all on the take and doesn’t give a {EXPLETIVE DELETED} about serving anyone or anything but themselves and their rich buddies.

  To survive, I was forced to cannibalize my savings and retirement, the last of which was a small IRA. This came in a year with mammoth expenses and not a single dollar of income. I filed no return that year thinking that because I didn’t have any income there was no need. The sleazy government decided that they disagreed. But they didn’t notify me in time for me to launch a legal objection so when I attempted to get a protest filed with the court I was told I was no longer entitled to due process because the time to file ran out. Bend over for another $10,000 helping of justice.

  So now we come to the present. After my experience with the CPA world, following the business crash I swore that I’d never enter another accountant’s office again. But here I am with a new marriage and a boatload of undocumented income, not to mention an expensive new business asset, a piano, which I had no idea how to handle. After considerable thought I decided that it would be irresponsible NOT to get professional help; a very big mistake.

  When we received the forms back I was very optimistic that they were in order. I had taken all of the years information to Bill Ross, and he came back with results very similar to what I was expecting. Except that he had neglected to include the contents of Sheryl’s unreported income; $12,700 worth of it. To make matters worse, Ross knew all along this was missing and I didn’t have a clue until he pointed it out in the middle of the audit. By that time it had become brutally evident that he was representing himself and not me.

  This left me stuck in the middle of this disaster trying to defend transactions that have no relationship to anything tax-related (at least the tax-related transactions were poorly documented). Things I never knew anything about and things my wife had no clue would ever matter to anyone. The end result is… well, just look around. I remember reading about the stock market crash before the “great” depression and how there were wealthy bankers and businessmen jumping out of windows when they realized they screwed up and lost everything. Isn’t it ironic how far we’ve come in 60 years in this country that they now know how to fix that little economic problem; they just steal from the middle class (who doesn’t have any say in it, elections are a joke) to cover their asses and it’s “business-as-usual”. Now when the wealthy {EXPLETIVE DELETED} up, the poor get to die for the mistakes… isn’t that a clever, tidy solution. As government agencies go, the FAA is often justifiably referred to as a tombstone agency, though they are hardly alone. The recent presidential puppet GW Bush and his cronies in their eight years certainly reinforced for all of us that this criticism rings equally true for all of the government. Nothing changes unless there is a body count (unless it is in the interest of the wealthy sows at the government trough). In a government full of hypocrites from top to bottom, life is as cheap as their lies and their self-serving laws.

  I know I’m hardly the first one to decide I have had all I can stand. It has always been a myth that people have stopped dying for their freedom in this country, and it isn’t limited to the blacks, and poor immigrants. I know there have been countless before me and there are sure to be as many after. But I also know that by not adding my body to the count, I insure nothing will change. I choose to not keep looking over my shoulder at “big brother” while he strips my carcass, I choose not to ignore what is going on all around me, I choose not to pretend that business as usual won’t continue; I have just had enough.

  I can only hope that the numbers quickly get too big to be white washed and ignored that the American zombies wake up and revolt; it will take nothing less. I would only hope that by striking a nerve that stimulates the inevitable double standard, knee-jerk government reaction that results in more stupid draconian restrictions people wake government reaction that results in more stupid draconian restrictions people wake up and begin to see the pompous political thugs and their mindless minions for what they are. Sadly, though I spent my entire life trying to believe it wasn’t so, but violence not only is the answer, it is the only answer. The cruel joke is that the really big chunks of shit at the top have known this all along and have been laughing, at and using this awareness against, fools like me all along.

  I saw it written once that the definition of insanity is repeating the same process over and over and expecting the outcome to suddenly be different. I am finally ready to stop this insanity. Well, Mr. Big Brother IRS man, let’s try something different; take my pound of flesh and sleep well.

  The communist creed: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

  The capitalist creed: From each according to his gullibility, to each according to his greed.

  Joe Stack (1956-2010)

  02/18/2010

10 Management Practices to Axe

by Liz Ryan
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
http://finance.yahoo.com/career-work/article/108815/ten-management-practices-to-axe


Every few years, a management book or philosophy emerges to change our thinking about the best ways to lead employees.

From The One Minute Manager to Who Moved My Cheese?, new and revived leadership concepts have shaped the way we organize, evaluate, inspire, and reward team members. With so many competing management theories in the mix, some ill-conceived practices were bound to take hold—and indeed, many have. Here's our list of the 10 most brainless and injurious:



1. Forced Ranking

The idea behind forced ranking is that when you evaluate your employees against one another, you'll see who's most critical on the team and who's most expendable. This theory rests on the notion that we can exhort our reports to work together for the sake of the team 364 days a year and then, when it really counts, pit them against one another in a zero-sum competitive exercise. That's a decent strategy for TV shows such as Survivor but disastrous for organizations that intend to stay in business for the long term. What to do instead: Evaluate employees against written goals and move quickly to remove poor performers all the time (not just once a year).

2. Front-Loaded Recruiting Systems

All the rage in the corporate hiring arena, so-called front-loaded hiring processes require candidates to surmount the Seven Trials of Hercules before earning so much as a phone call from your HR staff. Those trials can include credit checks, reference checks, online honesty tests, questionnaires, sample work assignments, and other mandatory drills that signal "We'll just need you to crawl over a few more bits of broken glass, and you may get that interview." Don't be fooled by job-market reports—talented, creative employees are as hard to snag as ever. Insulting and demeaning hiring practices are a big reason. What to do instead: Dismantle your Kafka-esque recruiting system and give hiring power back to your hiring managers. They'll thank you for it, and the quality and speed of your recruitment will skyrocket.


3. Overdone Policy Manuals

You know who's making money for your employer right now? Workers who are selling, building, or inventing stuff. You know who's spending the business's money right now? Other employees (most easily found in HR, IT, and Finance) who've been commanded to write, administer, and enforce the 10,000 policies that make up your company's employee handbook. Overblown policy efforts squelch creativity, bake fear into your culture, and make busywork for countless office admins, on top of wasting paper, time, and brain cells. What to do instead? Nuke one unnecessary or outdated policy every week and require the CEO's signature to add any new ones.

4. Social Media Thought Police

It's reasonable to block Youtube in the office because of the bandwidth it consumes. The recent e-mail message I received from a worker who'd just been informed of her employer's "no LinkedIn profiles permitted" policy sets a new low for organizational paranoia. Memo to your general counsel: Human beings work in your business, not robots or replicants. People have lives, brands, and connections beyond your walls, and those human entanglements are more likely to help your business than to hurt it. What to do instead: Treat people like babies only if you want them to act like babies. Let the rest of them update their LinkedIn, Facebook, and Twitter accounts appropriately, and if they're not getting their work done, deal with that problem on its own.

5. Rules That Force Employees to Lie

You won't be shocked to hear that a majority of working people believe their employers don't trust them. We throw gas on the fire when we install rules that encourage our employees to lie. A great example is the time-honored policy that says "Congratulations on the upcoming birth or adoption of your baby. We'll pay your insurance premiums while you're on maternity leave if you're planning to return to work afterward. If not, you'll be terminated when your leave starts, and pay your own premiums." Which Einstein dreamed up that brain-dead policy? What to do instead: Pay the same percentage of insurance premiums for all employees in a category (e.g. new moms) without requiring pointless declarations of their intentions. Don't allow any new rules (sick-time policies are a prime offender) that reward employees for withholding information.

6. Theft of Miles

Saving money is in, but taking it out of employees' hides in the form of stolen frequent-flier miles is the hallmark of a Mickey Mouse outfit. If your employees are trotting the globe to advance your cause, let them keep their hard-earned air and hotel miles. (Have you flown economy class recently?) What to do instead: Tell your travel agent to book one-stop flights in place of non-stop ones, saving a few bucks.

7. Jack-Booted Layoffs

It's no shame to have to reduce your workforce, but why treat departing employees like convicted felons? Anyone who tells you that an RIF requires perp-walk guided exits is someone to add to the next layoff list himself. One-on-one pink-slip discussions and dignified, non-immediate departures are the new norm for ethical organizations. If you have to march your loyal, redundant co-workers out the door, it says lots about the kind of workplace you've built. What to do instead: Deal with performance problems independently of staff reductions. Treat those employees you're forced to let go like the mature professionals they are.

8. 360-Degree Feedback Programs

I have a second-grader, and if my second-grader has something to say to his little friend Dylan, I encourage him to say it directly. I don't tell him, "Fill out this form, and we'll have the other kids fill out forms, too, and then we'll tell Dylan what all the kids think of him, anonymously." Apart from the fact that my kid doesn't know what "anonymously" means, this is very bad coaching for a budding communicator. The 360-degree feedback system is a crutch for poor managers. We need more forthright discussion among our teams, not sneaky group feedback mechanisms masquerading as career development tools. What to do instead: Ditch the 360 system and teach your employees how to give one another constructive criticism. (Teach your managers how to do it, too.)

9. Mandatory Performance-Review Bell Curves

The evil twin to forced ranking systems is the annual review protocol that commands managers to assign their employees in equal numbers into groups of Poor, Fair, Good, Above Average, and Excellent employees. If a CEO has so little faith in his or her managers that she'd plan for, much less settle for, a workforce where 50% of the people range from so-so to dismal, that CEO requires too little from the management team. Forcing performance-review (and salary-increase) distributions into a bell curve exalts and institutionalizes mediocrity. What to do instead: Set high standards for employee reviews and raise them every year. Counsel or remove managers who can't move past Easy Grader status, and trust the rest of your managers to review their employees fairly. If you can't trust your leadership team members to assess their employees, how can you trust them to manage at all?

10. Timekeeping Courtesy of Henry Ford

If you employ white-collar "knowledge workers" in your organization, you're better off giving them challenging assignments and standing back than managing them like assembly-line workers. An obsession with arrival and departure times is not the way to signal to your employees, "We're expecting great things from you," and neither are picky payroll practices that require salaried employees to use fractions of sick and personal days to attend to pressing life situations. Nothing spells "you're a cog in the machine" like a policy that happily allows you to work until midnight on a client project, then docks your pay when you're half an hour late arriving to work the next day. What to do instead: Set goals with your salaried employees, see that they meet them, and leave the how-and-where issues to your brilliant team members to manage for themselves.

Liz Ryan is an expert on the new-millennium workplace and a former Fortune 500 HR executive.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The $555,000 Student-Loan Burden

It is the result of her deferring loan payments while she completed her residency, default charges and relentlessly compounding interest rates. Among the charges: a single $53,870 fee for when her loan was turned over to a collection agency.

"Maybe half of it was my fault because I didn't look at the fine print," Dr. Bisutti says. "But this is just outrageous now."

To be sure, Dr. Bisutti's case is extreme, and lenders say student-loan terms are clear and that they try to work with borrowers who get in trouble.

But as tuitions rise, many people are borrowing heavily to pay their bills. Some no doubt view it as "good debt," because an education can lead to a higher salary. But in practice, student loans are one of the most toxic debts, requiring extreme consumer caution and, as Dr. Bisutti learned, responsibility.

Unlike other kinds of debt, student loans can be particularly hard to wriggle out of. Homeowners who can't make their mortgage payments can hand over the keys to their house to their lender. Credit-card and even gambling debts can be discharged in bankruptcy. But ditching a student loan is virtually impossible, especially once a collection agency gets involved. Although lenders may trim payments, getting fees or principals waived seldom happens.


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Yet many former students are trying. There is an estimated $730 billion in outstanding federal and private student-loan debt, says Mark Kantrowitz of FinAid.org, a Web site that tracks financial-aid issues -- and only 40% of that debt is actively being repaid. The rest is in default, or in deferment, which means that payments and interest are halted, or in "forbearance," which means payments are halted while interest accrues.

Although Dr. Bisutti's debt load is unusual, her experience having problems repaying isn't. Emmanuel Tellez's mother is a laid-off factory worker, and $120 from her $300 unemployment checks is garnished to pay the federal PLUS student loan she took out for her son.

By the time Mr. Tellez graduated in 2008, he had $50,000 of his own debt in loans issued by SLM Corp., known as Sallie Mae, the largest private student lender. In December, he was laid off from his $29,000-a-year job in Boston and defaulted. Mr. Tellez says that when he signed up, the loan wasn't explained to him well, though he concedes he missed the fine print.

Loan terms, including interest rates, are disclosed "multiple times and in multiple ways," says Martha Holler, a spokeswoman for Sallie Mae, who says the company can't comment on individual accounts. Repayment tools and account information are accessible on Sallie Mae's Web site as well, she says.

Many borrowers say they are experiencing difficulties working out repayment and modification terms on their loans. Ms. Holler says that Sallie Mae works with borrowers individually to revamp loans. Although the U.S. Department of Education has expanded programs like income-based repayment, which effectively caps repayments for some borrowers, others might not qualify.

Heather Ehmke of Oakland, Calif., renegotiated the terms of her subprime mortgage after her home was foreclosed. But even after filing for bankruptcy, she says she couldn't get Sallie Mae, one of her lenders, to adjust the terms on her student loan. After 14 years with patches of deferment and forbearance, the loan has increased from $28,000 to more than $90,000. Her monthly payments jumped from $230 to $816. Last month, her petition for undue hardship on the loans was dismissed.

Sallie Mae supports reforms that would allow student loans to be dischargeable in bankruptcy for those who have made a good-faith effort to repay them, says Ms. Holler.

Dr. Bisutti says she loves her work, but regrets taking out so many student loans. She admits that she made mistakes in missing payments, deferring her loans and not being completely thorough with some of the paperwork, but was surprised at how quickly the debt spiraled.


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She says she knew when she started medical school in 1999 that she would have to borrow heavily. But she reasoned that her future income as a doctor would make paying off the loans easy. While in school, her loans racked up interest with variable rates ranging from 3% to 11%.

She maxed out on federal loans, borrowing $152,000 over four years, and sought private loans from Sallie Mae to help make up the difference. She also took out two loans from Wells Fargo & Co. for $20,000 each. Each had a $2,000 origination fee. The total amount she borrowed at the time: $250,000.

In 2005, the bill for the Wells Fargo loans came due. Representatives from the bank called her father, Michael Bisutti, every day for two months demanding payment. Mr. Bisutti, who had co-signed on the loans, finally decided to cover the $550 monthly payments for a year.

Wells Fargo says it will stop calling consumers if they request it, says senior vice president Glen Herrick, who adds that the bank no longer imposes origination fees on its private loans.

Sallie Mae, meanwhile, called Mr. Bisutti's neighbor. The neighbor told Mr. Bisutti about the call. "Now they know [my dad's] daughter the doctor defaulted on her loans," Dr. Bisutti says.

Ms. Holler, the Sallie Mae spokeswoman, says that the company may contact a neighbor to verify an individual's address. But in those cases, she says, the details of the debt obligation aren't discussed.

Dr. Bisutti declined to authorize Sallie Mae to comment specifically on her case. "The overwhelming majority of medical-school graduates successfully repay their student loans," Ms. Holler says.

After completing her fellowship in 2007, Dr. Bisutti juggled other debts, including her credit-card balance, and was having trouble making her $1,000-a-month student-loan payments. That year, she defaulted on both her federal and private loans. That is when the "collection cost" fee of $53,870 was added on to her private loan.

Meanwhile, the variable interest rates continue to compound on her balance and fees. She recently applied for income-based repayment, but she still isn't sure if she will qualify. She makes $550-a-month payments to Wells Fargo for the two loans she hasn't defaulted on. By the time she is done, she will have paid the bank $128,000 -- over three times the $36,000 she received.

The $555,000 Student-Loan Burden
by Mary Pilon
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
http://finance.yahoo.com/college-education/article/108846/the-555000-student-loan-burden?mod=edu-continuing_education


When Michelle Bisutti, a 41-year-old family practitioner in Columbus, Ohio, finished medical school in 2003, her student-loan debt amounted to roughly $250,000. Since then, it has ballooned to $555,000.
She recently entered a rehabilitation agreement on her defaulted federal loans, which now carry an additional $31,942 collection cost. She makes monthly payments on those loans -- now $209,399 -- for $990 a month, with only $100 of it going toward her original balance. The entire balance of her federal loans will be paid off in 351 months. Dr. Bisutti will be 70 years old.

The debt load keeps her up at night. Her damaged credit has prevented her from buying a home or a new car. She says she and her boyfriend of three years have put off marriage and having children because of the debt.

Dr. Bisutti told her 17-year-old niece the story of her debt as a cautionary tale "so the next generation of kids who want to get a higher education knows what they're getting into," she says. "I will likely have to deal with this debt for the rest of my life."

投资指南:巴菲特2010年持股完全名单

http://news.creaders.net/headline/newsViewer.php?nid=421274&id=962003&dcid=7
巴菲特旗下的伯克希尔哈萨韦(Berkshire Hathaway)(BRK-B,BRK-A)公布了截至2009年12月31日的持股名单,这是巴菲特2010年持股明细的最新数据。我们看到有些股票被减持,其中某些股票自去年年底以来还可能被进一步减持。下面这个名单是按照字母顺序从A-Z排列的。
美国运通

(American Express)(AXP) 超过1亿5160万股,与上一季度相同。

美国银行

(Bank of America)(BAC) 500万股,与上一季度相同。

Becton Dickinson

(BDX) 增持至150万股,上一季度为120万股。

CarMax

(KMX) 减持至800万股,上一季度为900万股。

可口可乐

(Coca Cola)(KO) 2000万股,与上一季度相同。

Comcast

(CMCSA) 1200万股,与上一季度相同。

Comdisco Holdings

(CDCO) 大约1500万股,与上一季度相同。

康菲石油

(ConocoPhillips)(COP) 减持至3770万股,上一季度为5743万股,去年6月底为6248.5万股。

好市多

(Costco Wholesale)(COST) 525.4万股,与上一季度相同。

美孚石油

(Exxon Mobil)(XOM) 减持至仅42.18万股,这是上一季度的新头寸,当时持股为127.6万股。

Burlington Northern Santa Fe

(BNI) 在去年年底仍是持股之一,但现在已经无关紧要了,因为上周五伯克希尔哈萨韦已经完成了对它的收购。

Gannett

(GCI) 减持至220.2万股,上一季度为344.7万股。

通用电气

(General Electric)(GE) 777.7万股,与上一季度相同,但没有包括2008年年底的巨额优先股投资。

高盛

(Goldman Sachs)(GS) 高盛不是以普通股持有的,但巴菲特仍持有其优先股和认股权证。

葛兰素史克

(GlaxoSmithKline PLC)(GSK) 151万股,与上一季度相同。

哈雷戴维森

(Harley-Davidson)(HOG) 不是普通股,但巴菲特仍持有其优先股和认股权证。

家得宝

(Home Depot)(HD) 275.7万股,与上一季度相同。

英格索兰

(Ingersoll-Rand)(IR) 63.66万股,与上一季度相同,但两个季度前为787万股。

Iron Mountain

(IRM) 增持至700万股,上一季度为337.22万股。

强生

(Johnson & Johnson)(JNJ) 减持至2700万股多一点,减持前为3691万股,而2008年一度持股高达6200万股。

卡夫食品

(Kraft Foods)(KFT) 超过1亿3800万股,与上一季度相同。

Lowe's

Companies(LOW) 650万股,与上一季度相同。

M&T Bank

(MTB) 671万股,与上一季度相同。

穆迪

(Moody's)(MCO) 再次减持至3180万股,上一季度为3920万股,再往前一个季度为4800万股。

Nalco Holding

(NLC) 900万股,与上一季度相同。

雀巢

(Nestle)美国存托凭证(ADR) 340万股,与上一季度相同。

耐克

(Nike)(NKE) 764.1万股,与上一季度相同。

宝洁

(Procter & Gamble)(PG) 减持至大约8750万股,上一季度为9630万股。

Norfolk Southern

(NSC) 该季度已经被彻底售出,因为巴菲特已经通过收购BNSF投资美国铁路运输。

NRG Energy

(NRG) 该季度已经被彻底售出,上一季度为持股720万股。

Republic Services

(RSG) 增持至829万股,该股为巴菲特跟随比尔・盖茨的投资步伐在上一季度首次持有。

赛诺菲-安万特

(Sanofi Aventis)(SNY) 超过390万股,与上一季度相同。

Sun Trust Bank

(STI) 减持至将近240万股,上一季度为307.9万股,两个季度前超过320万股。

蒂芙尼

(Tiffany & Co)(TIF) 不是普通股,但巴菲特依然持有其优先股和认股权证。

Torchmark

(TMK) 大约282万股,与上一季度相同。

Travelers Cos

(TRV) 仅低仓持有27336股,与上一季度相同。

US Bancorp

(USB) 大约6900万股,与上一季度相同。

USG Corp

(USG) 1707.2万股,与上一季度相同。

United Health

(UNH) 减持至117.5万股,上一季度为340万股,已经是连续第三次减持。

United Parcel Service

(UPS) 142.9万股,与上一季度相同。

沃尔玛

(Wal-Mart Stores)(WMT) 增持至3900万股,上一季度为3780万股,两个季度前为1990万股。

华盛顿邮报

(Washington Post)(WPO) 超过172万股,与上一季度相同。

富国银行

(Wells Fargo)(WFC) 增持至3亿1950万股左右,上一季度为3亿1330万股,两个季度前为3亿200万股,三个季度前为2亿9000万股。

Wellpoint

(WLP) 减持至134.3万股,上一季度为339.4万股,为连续第三个季度减持。

Wesco Financial

(WSC) 570.3万股,与上一季度相同。

Union Pacific

(UNP) 该季度已经被彻底售出,因为巴菲特已经通过收购BNSF投资美国铁路运输。

Monday, February 15, 2010

从阿拉巴马大学枪杀案看美国大学的终身评审制度

从阿拉巴马大学枪杀案看美国大学的终身评审制度 2010-02-14 08:03:55

http://blog.creaders.net/dreamweaver/user_blog_diary.php?did=55444

周五(2/12), 平静的阿拉巴马大学校园发生了一起骇人听闻的枪杀案, 造成三人死亡,一人受重伤。但此案和其他的校园枪击案有所不同,因为它的主犯嫌疑人并不是学生,而是该校生物系的助理教授, 42 岁的 Amy 博士。虽然此案的具体细节现在还无从得知,但从枪击发生的时间和枪击对象来判断,应该是和该教授前不久申请终身 未得到批准有关。正好周四我参与了一个系里的终身评审会议,昨天刚把系委员会的决议信写出来给大家讨论,所以这件事引起的震惊可想而知。联系到过去几年来这方面的一些所见所闻, 写下此文抛砖引玉。

先要声明的是,美国有几千所大学,无论从规模还是性质来讲,差别都很大, 因此对终身教授的评审条件和过程的严格程度也千差万别。这里只是就我自己了解的一些一般情况,和自己经历过的一些例子来进行一些讨论。

大家知道,美国的大学教授一般都是“终身轨道”制(tenure track)。顾名思义,从博士毕业找到教职之后,就会进入这个“终身制”的“轨道”,而轨道的尽头,当然就是拿到“终身”这个“铁饭碗”了。设立终身制度的目的,除了给予教授们“工作保障”之外(这可能是目前美国社会唯一制度性存在的“铁饭碗”了),更重要的是为了提供学术自由的环境。有了终身职位的学者们,从原则上说是可以不“看人眼色”行事,在教学和研究上享有较大的自由,不会担心自己从事的研究项目不合乎上级或者校方的意图而被“炒鱿鱼”。当然,这只是一般的情况,如果遇到特殊状况,比如所在的专业因为经费或者其他原因被“端”掉,那么即便有终身教职, 也会失去工作(当然这种情况是很少见的)。另外,如果自己有违反学校或者职业规范的行为,比如涉嫌论文抄袭,或者被控性别歧视(包括性骚扰)或者种族歧视等行为,也有可能会失去工作。

一般来讲,大学会给新雇用的助理教授六年的“终身轨道”期限,也就是在第六年申请终身。当然在这之前,每年会有例行评审,但评审的详细和严格则因学校而异。像我所在的学校,每年都会要求没有终身的教授交上详细的“portfolio", 其中要列举自己在过去一年中所取得的成绩,包括教学材料,每一门课程的学生评审总结,发表的文章,参加的会议,以及校内校外的一些”服务“活动(比如参加各种各样的职工委员会,在相关的组织担任职务等等)。这些材料要通过一级一级的评审(比如系里的人事委员会 --多由已经获得终身的教授组成 --系主任,院长,然后是全校的人事委员会-- 由各个学院的终身教授代表组成 --, 最后送达管学术的副校长,由他/她综合各级的意见,向校长提出留任或者不留任的意见。这个过程在第六年的时候再次重复, 如果结果是留任并给予终身,那么就意味着这个漫长的程序到此结束。如果得不到终身,一般也不会让你马上离开(因为这些评审都会在第六年的年初进行),而是给予一年的“grace period, 让你能够在此期间寻找其他的工作;有些情况下,或许会给申请人“特殊考虑”,让你在这一年中就不足的方面进行提高和补救,一年后再次评审,如果合格,可能留任并得到终身, 否则就会请你走路了。拿到终身的教授,每年还是要进行自我评定。但这种评定一般都是院内进行,和终身的层层评审不可同日而语。有些学校为了鼓励拿到终身的教授继续努力科研和教学,还设立了"post-tenure review" 的制度。当然还有升迁正教授这个end of the tunnel。

可以想见,这是一个漫长的过程,也是为什么不少教授将拿到终身之前的这几年说成是“拿第二个博士学位” 。 从时间的长度和工作的强度以及期望来讲,这一点都不过份。当然,前面说过,不同的学校,对终身的要求会千差万别。如果你有幸进入所谓的“Research I”性质的学校,那你面临的最大期望肯定是研究成果,这些学校是所谓的“publish or perish”的环境,也就是说,如果你不能在六年中发表相当数量和质量的文章,那么最后的结局几乎是可以肯定的。我以前就有一位教授,尽管经常得到院里的“年度教学奖”(整个学院每年只有一个,说明他的教学是非常棒的),但因为没有什么拿得出手的文章,最后也没有得到终身。当然这些学校一般也会对新来的教授提供很多研究方面的支持,除了经费和资源充足之外,还有时间上的“奢侈” (这类学校的教授每学期只教两门课的情况并不少见), 所以他们对教授的研究方面的“期望”,也是可以理解的。但大家也知道,发表学术文章的过程本身也有很多不确定性, 而且周期往往很长(者点当然和专业有关。据我所知,科学方面的学术杂志审稿周期比较短,但在我们所在的商科专业,一篇文章经过两三年的审议才能发表,是很常见的事), 所以对教授的时间管理和项目管理的能力要求很高。我以前的一位教授就这样告诫我 -- 最好在任何时刻,手上都有三个以上的研究项目,而且要保证它们所处的“阶段”不同 -- 比如一个只是在“理论发展”方面,另外一个最好就是在收集数据了,最后一个呢,如果是在最后完稿,或者已经在等编辑意见了 -- 这样的好处是,你可以把精力有目的地分配,不至于所有的东西都在同一时间需要你同样的精力投入。 从这点,也可以看出大学教授科研方面的压力。 除此之外,你还有教学的要求,以及各种服务的义务,所以时间和精力上的投入都是很大的。不少年青教授头几年几乎无瑕顾及家庭。上面给我建议的这位教授,就在拿到终身后的第二年离婚了,原因是太太对他“不顾家,只顾工作”强烈不满!

前面说过,每年的留任和最后的终身评审,要经过层层“关卡”,这就是可能出现“非正常情况”的地方了。每个学校,每个专业都会有自己的内部标准, 但这些标准的详细程度就很难一概而论。从评审的角度来说,这些条件应该是越详细越好(比如五年内要在某个级别的学术刊物发表多少篇文章,等等),但学术成就的评定,还是有很多“灰色领域”。这就造成了有时候一些和教授表现无关的因素起作用的情况。而且,各级评审意见不一的情况也常常出现 -- 比如我就知道好几起通过了学院这一关,却被校级的人事委员会否决的情况。由于校级委员会的成员来自全校各个学院,不像院一级的都是对你比较了解,对你的领域比较了解的同行,所以发生意见不同的机会会更多。在这种情况下,当然决策权最终在学术副校长和校长手上,虽然他们有权否定校级委员会的决议,但这种情况相对较少,因为终身评审是“教授治校”的体制的一个重要部分,所以他们一般不会愿意插手太多,尤其不愿意否决校级委员会的决议。当然,如果教授认为决议不公(比如有歧视嫌疑),他/她完全可以上诉,学校也必须立案调查(如果学校有教师工会的话,最好是通过工会代理上诉,因为一个人挑战整个制度,总是很intimidating 的)。调查结果如果发现校方决议缺乏可信理由,可能会推翻原判,或者给予其他的安抚或者补偿。如果调查结果维持原判,那么教授就只有离开了。

在了解更多本案具体背景之前,无法对该案件发表更多的看法。但有一点是可以肯定的,无论 教授认为自己如何受到了不公正的对待,愤而开枪杀死自己的同仁,毕竟不是一件值得称道的事情。虽然我可以理解她十年寒窗,六年奋斗,确面临到头来竹篮打水一场空的结局时内心的愤懑和不满,但事情应该可以有更好的解决办法。即便是不得不离开学校,也不见得就是END OF WORLD. 用中国人的老话来说,此处不留爷,自有留爷处,何必要在一棵树上吊死呢?

大过年的,本来不想写这样题材的文章,不过网友多思出了题目,下周又有很多忙碌的事情,恐怕无法顾及博克,所以还是趁周末有空把它写了出来, 起个抛砖引玉的作用。再次申明,本文只是泛泛而论, 可能有挂一漏万之嫌. 有不妥之处,请大家包涵。



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作者:欧阳峰 留言时间:2010-02-14 08:34:21
昭君:抢了个沙发,哈哈!

谢谢你的介绍。我在想,这套制度能不能在中国实施?二,三十年前,人们常常批评中国的人才选拔制度“长官意志”太盛,“人事关系”占太大比重,缺少客观标准。现在,学校里的招聘,提升制度“客观”了很多很多,几篇SCI文章,被引用数,影响因子,第几作者,搞得非常“数字化”。但对这套系统人们还是诟病很多,甚至斥之为学术腐败的根源。

从你的介绍看,美国的评审制度中也有很大随意性,人事因素也很重要。那这些“人治”的成分是优点还是缺点呢?

我想:一个学者的水平最终是要靠同行的“人”来判断的。问题是这些“人”受不受制约。在美国,学校之间有市场竞争,如果内部评审运作不当,就面临学校在市场上被淘汰的后果。而中国的学校优劣很大程度上由政府的资助和政策优惠决定,负责人才选拔的那些人并不对学校的表现负责,所以弊端就更多些。你同意这个说法吗?抑或两者的差别与文化和传统有关?

作者:twocentsworth 留言时间:2010-02-14 08:49:24
昭君,
I just want to be the first to congratulate you on another well-reasoned, balanced and yet compassionate piece.
It is still too early to form any conclusion about this sad event, and I'll leave mine till later.
Happy Chinese New Year.
A big 红包 for you!

作者:多思 留言时间:2010-02-14 08:54:44
昭君,首先向你与你的家人们致以新年好!

真是难以想象,大年夜向你“约稿”,年初一你就“付印”了,这种速度简直让我难以想象,也弄得我很不好意思。尤其是听说你最近很忙,而且用中文打字速度很慢,真是难为你了。这也让我想起你的题头语--“我思故我在”。换句话说。你大概一直勤于思辨,忙于思考,“无思不再在”吧?哈哈哈:)

之所以给你出这一难题,一是因为看到阿拉巴马大学的枪击案;二是刚刚看完日本作家山崎丰子的小说以及根据该小说改编的电视剧《白色巨塔》,其中很大篇幅就是讲述日本医学院评审教授的事情,引起我的很多好奇与思考。

我早就听说在美国大学评为终身教授非常之艰难,看了你的介绍,真的很长见识。我完全可以理解“终身教授”这个“铁饭碗”的意义与重要性。但是我也萌生一个了又一个问题----虽然“拿到终身的教授,每年还是要进行自我评定”。但也正如你所说的那样“这种评定一般都是院内进行,和终身的层层评审不可同日而语”。如何才能防止获得“终身职位”的教授出现懒散落伍的现象呢?

写到这里,我又突发“奇谈怪想”。我觉得你或许可以围绕大学文化有意识地写一系列文章,将来汇编成为一本专著,专门介绍与评价美国的大学文化(甚至可以包括中学文化)。其中可写的内容很多很多,比如:

生源--美国大学如何选择录取新生?高中生如何报考的学校?
课程--美国大学如何开始课程?如何选编教材?
教授--美国大学如何选拔评选教授?如何保持教授的自由度又不失懒散落伍?
排名--美国大学的排名如何产生?是否合理?
经费--美国大学如何获得经费(包括州立大学与私立大学)?如何监管经费的使用与摊派?
......
我曾经看过一些中文书,专门介绍如何进入美国大学学习。但是好像没有看到专门介绍美国大学文化的中文专著。这样的书籍至少可以面对三种读者群体。一是渴望进入美国大学深造的学子;二是考虑在美国大学任教就职的在校生;三是华裔文化中各大院校的管理人员。你在这些方面有着很多的亲身感受与思考,真的可以大有作为!

对不起,大年夜“忽悠”你写一篇文章,年初一又“忽悠”你写一本书,大概是我实在太会“忽悠”了吧?实在是觉得你的视野很宽、思辨力很强、知识面很广,仅仅将你的文章零敲碎打地“耗散”在“万维博客”,似乎有点儿可惜。

以上所说,纯属信口开河的“忽悠”。假如词不达意,敬请原谅!

作者:多思 留言时间:2010-02-14 08:57:40
对不起,打字疏忽了。不是“无思不再在”,应该是“无思不自在”。

作者:山哥 留言时间:2010-02-14 09:21:31
昭君:
在西方作生物学教授太难了。

祝虎年好。

作者:红妆 留言时间:2010-02-14 10:41:03
昭君过年好!祝虎年大吉,万事如意,思绪连绵,佳作连连!

作者:牛北村 留言时间:2010-02-14 12:02:00
A good article.

There are two more points regarding following the "T-track".

(a) Toward the end of the fifth year, the candidate will have come up with a list of well-known professors as potential referees. This requires an assistant professor to reach out from day one. The school will also pick up some bigwigs in the field that are not on the candidate’s list.

(b) Obtaining tenure is not the end of story. From associate to full professorship, it usually takes another five to six years, although there is no time table for this second-phase promotion. Relaxation after getting tenured can lose momentum in research. Because of this, many universities practically have “permanent associate professors.” So, adding undergraduate and Ph. D. study years, the making of an "iron bowl" takes at least 4 + 4 + 6 + 6 = 20 years.

作者:田木山狱 留言时间:2010-02-14 13:45:16
首先祝昭君全家新年快乐,生活开心,工作顺利。
很好的文章,看了后确实长了很多关于美国选拔教授的知识。这件事情肯定又会引发媒体与社会的一大通激烈的讨论与反省,个人认为有的时候这种事情有些太小题大做。这里并不是说事态的不严重性,而是指这种及其个别的事件的确是难以预防的。因为这是涉及到个人的心态,即使是同样的心态,又要加上各种不同诱导的因素,最后在特定的环境下爆发。而发生的几率和频率又是极其微小,就如以往的校园枪击案。所以最后往往是大家一顿激昂感慨之后,结果不过还是成为历史,而下一次的案件也不会因为这次事件而有任何改变,该发生的还是会发生。
而在这种事情上,我们又能做些什么。如果有着同样的经历,我能是否做出同样的事情?社会的宽容性到底又有多大?但是如果作为遇难者家属,我又是否能够原谅?也许我更愿意把这件枪击案和很多很难预防的事情更归于一种命运,造成的最终结果是和任何一起意外事故所造成的伤亡一样。可正是因为它的戏剧性与特例性,才会被人更多的评论,而它造成的伤害其实却远远低于一次意外的飞机事故。但是对于事情的发生,还是感到非常遗憾的。

作者:含蓄 留言时间:2010-02-14 14:11:25
光顾吃饺子了,没顾得上来看。现在一看,昭君已经洋洋一大篇了,思路真快,应该做“特快记者”了,哈哈。
昭君讲的很全面,也很对。
补充一点:评终身教授,的确看硬东西,你发表的东西有多少,学生评语如何,社区服务多少。但是,也有一个很微妙的东西,这是明文上没有的,是看不见说不出的,但又是很致命的东西:你是不是招人喜欢。这不是说你一定要让每个人都喜欢你,这是很难做到的,但你至少不应该是招很多人都反感的人。美国人里有很多性格古怪的人,他们意识不到这一点,只沉浸在自我中,想埋怨什么埋怨什么。的确美国有言论自由,但是美国人更考虑他们将来要长期相处的同事是否好相处,谁都不想周围有个刺猬,让你整天难受。我就见到过这样的例子。每次开全校大会,这位教授都提反对意见。当然了,坦诚地讲,他的话也没有错,但是很多人都反感。他是已经拿到“终身教授”的人,最后还是以别的什么理由被赶走了。他上诉了,但也没用。
所以,枪杀的那位教授(具体情形还不是很清楚),但看见几个评论,说她好像性格上有些怪。这不一定是她枪杀的原因,但也绝对不能排除。

作者:昭君 留言时间:2010-02-14 14:29:38
欧阳:
谢谢评论。我知道国内现在已经开始有学校在试验终身制了,但具体如何操作不清楚。我也感觉这样的体制在国内很难做成,具体理由你已经提到了。就连学生评审教授的教学这一条,我觉得难度就很大。更不用说公报私仇,拉关系走后门这些问题了。

多思:
你可真能忽悠,你确定不是赵本山的徒弟?这样的书,我想应该会有人去写的,而且最好是由搞教育研究的人写,我么,只能发表一些浅见,要写专著,就勉为其难了。

我中文打字很快,这点没问题,你refer的大概是我回复twocentsworth 的时候说的那句话吧 -- 我的意思是写英文比写中文快多了,呵呵。

拿到终身之后的确会有些人会出现懒散落伍的情况,这肯定不是实行这个制度的人的本意,但这也可以理解。所以最好有比较有效的post-tenure review,当然如文中所说,下面牛北村也提到,从副教授到教授,还是很艰难的,所以如果想要走到这一步的话,还是不能松懈的。当然,拿到正教授后,又要寻找新的目标了:)。


北村:
早就感觉你肯定也是同行,现在更确定了:)。握手握手!

你说得很对,终身评审中外界的推荐信很重要,最好是本学科的比较有成就的人。当然如果你的推荐人对你没有什么了解,只是有名气,也没什么用。有的 申请人推荐信一大堆,真正有份量的就那么几个,反而让看的人产生厌烦。
从副教授到教授又几乎是一个六年,当然不是所有的副教授都有这个“野心”,这样的话,就造就了大批“eternal associate professors”,呵呵。

作者:昭君 留言时间:2010-02-14 14:36:50
山哥:
嗯,我知道学生物学的教授在美国很难,竞争太厉害了。看看那么多中国的生物学者就可以知道供大于求的状况了。不过我想她那么好的背景,应该不会有问题找到另外的工作吧。当然我这可能是站着说话不腰疼了。

红妆:
这么久没见,忙什么了?期望早 早看到你的新作!

含蓄:
我们今天才请朋友来家吃火锅过年,所以昨天有点时间码字:)。
你说的很对,终身评审过程毕竟是一个人为的过程,尽管有硬性标准, 但人际关系和其他方面的东西也不可忽视。这当然不是说你为了得到终身就要去拉关系或者什么,但至少不要有太多人对你有太负面的印象。

田木:

谢谢你的真知灼见!说得非常在理。不过我想对于我们这些身在其中的人来说,恐怕还是有点震撼的。至少在投反对票的时候,要小心一点了:)。


Twocentsworth:
That's true. There's not enough information now for us to draw any meaningful conclusion about this case itself. But I just want to use this incidence to comment on the system itself.

作者:多思 留言时间:2010-02-14 14:56:40
昭君,我哪有充当赵本山徒弟的才能?这几天倒真是在考虑写一篇短文,闲聊央视春晚小品的题材倾向,主题就是忽悠:)

看了欧阳、北村和含蓄等人的留言,感觉美国大学终身教职的评审带有很多人为的因素,确实是一件很难操作,也是很难掌控的事情啊。

作者:含蓄 留言时间:2010-02-14 16:48:29
多思:我感觉,最难的还是硬件东西,比如发表文章或书之类的。软件的人为因素其实不难,只要本着为人nice的原则,一般人都没什么问题。这里有一点好,就是你的晋升或终身对别人没有威胁,没有名额限制,只要你自己达到标准就行了。如果有名额限制,那就要人踩人了。没有枪的地方,跳楼就比较方便。

作者:多思 留言时间:2010-02-14 17:26:37
含蓄,阅读你的留言常常让我忍俊不已。比如“没有枪的地方,跳楼就比较方便。”呵呵!看来,你不仅含蓄,还相当幽默。

你说“最难的还是硬件东西,比如发表文章或书之类的。”对此,我完全相信,但发表文章或出书毕竟是与文字或数字打交道,总不至于送命吧。我是担心评定职称时有很多人为因素,是否会因得罪人而挨枪子呢?比如这次阿拉巴马的悲剧。

借昭君一方宝地,再询问两位教授一个问题:假如某人在美国一所大学获得了终身教职,异想天开,见异思迁,想要前往另一大学就职。是否原先的终身教职也就因此作废,又要开始十几年的长途跋涉呢?对不起,只是好奇而已!大概我的问题太多了吧?

作者:zink 留言时间:2010-02-14 17:42:41
昭君可谓是及时雨!

作者:百草风茂 留言时间:2010-02-14 18:12:02
先做一下试验

作者:百草风茂 留言时间:2010-02-14 18:24:52
这件事确实是应该好好讨论的。这些讨论不是用来指责美国,而是对在中国的一些大学试行终身教职制度有帮助。终身教职制度的本意是保证学术自由。在大学公司化的情况下,这样的制度是否跟这个原来的目的相关,就很难说了。终身教职评审中的黑暗,有多少受害者愿意说呢?整个过程都是“人为刀俎,我为鱼肉”。任何一个环节都有政治鲨鱼嗜血坑人的机会,最后的结果都是一个各方势力博弈的产物。有幸运的人,一直没有碰到这样的政治鲨鱼。也有很多幸运的人,遇到了政治鲨鱼的击杀,但是这些被正直的人或者自己的朋友阻挡了,尤其是在一些规模较大的系里。不幸的人,就各有自己的不幸故事了。

作者:百草风茂 留言时间:2010-02-14 18:30:29
作为一个美国大学体制里混过的人,我写了一篇长篇小说,就是揭露这些黑幕的(去年在天涯连载了四个月)。

作者:流溪河 留言时间:2010-02-14 19:06:04
祝昭君和家人春节快乐,新年好。

同意诸位介绍的信息与评议看法。再补充几点。升迁(tenure或正教授),除了研究,教学,服务三大块的衡量权重外(不同学校,不同系差别可以满大),与此君在系里有无与某位或几位有影响的资深正教授关系好,获鼎力支持,有很重要的关系,尤其在相对弱的case。在系评审委员会讨论时,需要有人为你讲话撑腰。在美国中国都一样,总会有一部份人的想法受另一些人的看法影响。这在讨论升副教授(tenure) 的情况比较明显,因为正副教授都有投票权,但副教授受正教授的影响可能性大一些,因为他(她)们还要与系里的big shots 保有一定程度的一致,不对他(她)们将来晋升正教授带来不必要的负面因素。这种人事政治,站队拉派,在美国的高等学府一样存在。 此外对于border case,一般对升tenure会手下(投票)留情点,因为过不了此君很可能将来会离开学术界(一流大牌学校除外,还有去低一等学校的可能)。对升正教授卡的严一些(正教授是系里最有权的俱乐部),毕竟还有饭碗,还有机会再来。

看到参与此贴讨论的诸位多具有理性心态,再多加一点走题的话。是否可以反思一下我们对中国或美国发生的事情的反应。去年当几起海归不幸遭遇发生时,海外网上评议大多数第一反应是指责或联想中国大学的不是,而不是具体情况具体分析看待。即使认为那几位海归的个人心理素质有欠缺,也把账算到中国教育的失败。我观察,对这起发生在美国的悲剧(白人主角),海外网友几乎所有评论分析都是理性的就事论事,不急于引伸出是美国大学体系的黑暗弊病,乃或是哈佛教育的失败。(这是对的。世界上许多事不是黑白一刀两半切,不应指木为林。)望海外华人也能秉此理性心态看待中国土地上发生的事情,至少不要急于下结论。共勉。

作者:流溪河 留言时间:2010-02-14 19:40:46
再加一句。若某位有影响的资深正教授高唱反调,其杀伤力有可能会很大。

作者:一粒 留言时间:2010-02-14 19:42:36
这个Dr. Bishop 几年前失手把她亲弟弟给枪掉了...虽然后啦没有判罪, 但多少跟这个有点关联(心理个性上的)

其实很多大学里有双轨制, 即终身制(tenuer track) 和合同制(Collateral faculty) 教职里总数大概是各占一半左右

终身制位置的聘请就十分严格, 每个学校都有一套固定的程序, 而且得到位置的助理教授学校都会提供相当优惠的薪水, 和科研启动资金. 学校希望通过终身教职的授予, 并期待这些人能成为学校的栋梁. 但如同文中所说的并不是所有达到表面条件的就可以升入终身副教授, 还要加上当年整个学校的经费, 编制是否有空缺(私立,公立都差不多)及人事关系等. 但淘汰率整体大约不超过1/5. 就算是终身教授如果人事关系紧张, 申请不到科研经费, 日子也是不好过的比如把实验室收掉, 搬小的办公室, 多上课, 提早退休, 等等..当然能力强的副教授, 不满待遇的也常常跳槽, 到其他学校/单位升正教授, 一年后(试用期)就可以继续当终身教授.

合约制 (Collateral faculty) 教职的招聘相对容易些, 也不会签长期合同, 一般都是每年一签.但有很多人也跟终身制一样能熬到退休, 主要是第一学校需要, 随着经济状况, 学生人数的变化, 这部分人的调整相对容易. 而且他们要承担比较多的教学任务, 和管理任务, 大部分人的教学很受学生欢迎, 人际关系也好. 合约制的解聘需要给一年的时间(但classified faculty, 可以更短些).

还有一个现象是, 名校毕业生在二三线的学校表现并不十分突出...有报道说, 经统计调查, 大部分名校毕业生与普通学校毕业生在二十年后的薪水比较没有显著性差异...

作者:MIR 留言时间:2010-02-14 20:03:25
谨请楼主今后小心!开系会能不去就不去!能坐门口就坐门边!我想MOST Americans THINK that PROF. AMY BISHOP DID a RIGHT THING!

作者:只作评论不写文章 留言时间:2010-02-14 22:55:31
如果是个热衷于做学问的人,做到教授既是多年努力的一个结果,也是个可以更加自由地钻研学问的开端。如果对做学问并不特别感兴趣(绝大多数人正是如此),仅仅是为了教授名号或者为了生活做学术研究,那这条路就显得太过艰辛了。
很佩服在发达国家做到教授的学兄学妹们。希望你们潜心做研究,在过去努力的基础上再经+6或+10,站到所在专业的最高点,让吾等华人为有你们感到自豪。

作者:椰子 留言时间:2010-02-15 00:01:47
椰公评:
在研究型大学要那终身教授确实难。我在一所地区性大学(虽然商学院在60年代就开始得到AACSB认证),我校有教师工会,教师工会代表教师同学校行政当局谈判,工资是最主要的谈判项目,除此之外,也对终身评定,正教授评定作出可操作性规定。各学院、系有相应的标准和程序,这些标准透明,每个进来的人从一开始就要提交经各级审核通过的“Faculty Activity Plan”,里面明文列明要完成的任务(当然,对发表物很难100%定性),如果时间到了,任务也完成了,评定终身等应该八九不离十;达不到,则自觉走人。这对教师是一个很好的保障。我在系人事委员会,因为有“Faculty Activity Plan”,我们的工作也就有章可循,相对简单。

据我所知,许多地区性大学有教师工会。当然教师工会有利有弊,尤其对商学院是弊大于利,这里就不展开了。

作者:twocentsworth 留言时间:2010-02-15 06:28:42
昭君,
It would not be appropriate to comment on the specifics of the Alabama case here. However we should keep in mind that this is an “outlying” case, and should not be an example used to judge the U.S. tenure system. 换句话说,阿拉巴马大学事件对北美tenure体系不应该是具有代表性的。

I don’t have the official numbers, however my impression (昭君 please correct me if I’m wrong) is that 80+% of those on “tenure track” DO complete their track successfully. Those who fail to win tenure fail either because the original hiring process was flawed (e.g. the person is not suited to an academic career and that fact should have come to light sooner), or has fallen victim to university “politics”, or both. In the first case (“not cut out for academia – 不适应学术界生活”), being denied tenure may well be the best thing that has happened to his/her life and he/she should give serious consideration to another line of work. As for the second case (campus politics), it’s sad but true that every walk of life has its own “rules of the game”. One needs to learn the “rules of game” and play accordingly to be successful.

作者:昭君 留言时间:2010-02-15 07:35:22
谢谢各位评论,时间关系,恕不一一回复。这里只说明两点:

一,此事应该是一个“ outlier case”,不具多少代表性。任何事情都有内因和外因,但正如Twocentsworth所说,在了解更多具体情况之前,对于内因( 教授自身的因素)和外因(该校终身评定和具体到这个个案评定中的一些可能问题)都无法做太多讨论。所以此文只是从制度的角度来分析一些利与弊,从中看出一些可能产生问题的地方。所以不存在对中国海归自杀事件谴责外因,对美国教授杀人事件只说内因的“区别对待”。退一步说,那几位中国海归的事件都是自杀,和拿枪射杀无辜同僚还是有质的区别的。

另外,我也是刚看到这位教授86年涉嫌枪击自己的兄弟致死的报道,但据说此案最后以“枪走火”结案,好像是她的母亲提供了对她有利的证词。如果此事并非事故,那么至少可以说明该教授心理和精神不稳定是由来已久的。一般来说雇主雇用新人的时候会做详细的背景调查,这类“非正常”记录应该是有注意
到的。当然,是否可以因此而不雇用条件合格的申请人,那又另当别论。

谢谢关注。这些讨论中的意义早已超过我文章的内容,而这正是我初衷所在。谢谢!

作者:lesson 留言时间:2010-02-15 09:00:15
就杀人而言, 是“outlier case". 就这一制度来说, 不是很人性化的。 尤其现在, NIH grant 基金满足不了现有的大学tenure track 的教授们的需求, 即使科研做的不错, 申请书写得不合评审人员的胃口, 拿不到基金,就会被淘汰出局。 现在, 多数研究型大学, 基金申请比教学重要。 现在的大学,有些完全是公司化管理, 甚至公司还不如。 不过, 人就是这样的。当你有一份安稳工作时, 你就要得更多, 就会不满所谓的“大锅饭”, 总觉得自己比他人行。 尤其是在以“钱”为纲的社会! 没有想到的是,十个人都能干, 但只有五个位置。 本来, 这五个位置可以十个人分了。 为了理想, 这十个人都有可能干的很好。 但是, 为了钱,为了调动“积极性”,设置无谓的竞争, 让五个人下岗。 结果, 往往搬起石头砸自己的脚。 中国三十年来的改革, 就是最好的注解。

丰田公司的汽车

http://finance.creaders.net/newsViewer.php?nid=420915&id=961245

美联社刊登文章说,近来丰田公司的汽车回召坏消息不断,表面上看来丰田公司前景不妙,很多人都忘记了上个季度丰田公司实际上业绩不错。

因此,洛杉矶外国股票研究公司Reed, Conner & Birdwell经理Sean Thorpe说,他预期未来几个季度丰田的利润会更好,目前股票由于坏消息而下降19%是给投资者一个买进的机会。


投资的一个赚钱方法就是在股票出坏消息时买进,而不是在出好消息的时候买进;但是投资者往往采取相反的方法,他们更愿意随大流买进卖出。历史经验表明,在汽车公司回召汽车而导致股票下跌时,往往是一个买进的机会。

著名制药厂Merck & Co在2004年时,由于止痛剂Vioxx导致心肌埂塞而不得不停产,当时股价一度跌到九年的最低点。但是在后来的五年里,Merck股上升了27%,进入了标准普尔500指数。

1994年12月DELL公司由于电脑中的芯片出问题不得不召回大批电脑,股票在八天里下跌8%,但是,在之后的六个月里股票不仅回升,而且翻了一番。

Levick Strategic Communication的经理Gene Grabowski:汽车回召是一个买进该公司股票的机会,一般来讲股价会在未来五到六个月里反弹。

专家举例说,利用公司出坏消息的机会买进股票,是很多投资大师赚钱的方法。比如股神巴菲特在1974年熊市时买进大量股票,获利丰厚。

当然也有相反的例子,比如亿万富翁Joseph Lewis在金融危机时向Bear Stearns公司投入10亿,但是没想到Bear Stearns很快就倒闭了。

那么对于丰田公司的投资者来讲,丰田股价什么时候才会好转呢?

HIS Global Insight的分析员Rebecca Lindland说丰田的情况还会进一步恶化,她相信这次汽车回召会影响丰田的声誉,而且会影响未来几年的销售。

lindliand说丰田在过去一段时间已经开始走下坡了,在美国市场上的份额减少,被韩国现代和Subaru取代。由于这次回召,很多初次买丰田汽车的顾客不会再回头了。

确实,在这次回召之前丰田公司的经营已经面临一些困难,由于经济衰退,该公司的销售不如以前好。另外,日元对美元升值也严重影响了该公司以日元计的利润。

但是Thorpe仍然看好丰田,他相信随着世界经济好转丰田的销售也会好起来,几年后大家都不会记得这次回召。他预测在未来3到5年里,丰田股价会达到每股100美元的价位,也就是说,如果投资者现在买进丰田股并持股三年,加上分红,就等于每年有10%的回报。

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Tuition money GONE!

http://www.fatwallet.com/forums/finance/988098/?start=0

(1) Stop running his life for him. Maybe college just isn't his thing,

Kick the bum out to the curb, give him a chance to grow up in the life of hard knocks.

(2) Exactly -- The only reason I'm so damn cheap now is because I grew up that way. My parents were straight poor (food stamps/medicare; legitimately), and while growing up they constantly hammered the value of a dollar in my head. One of my earliest memories was around 3 years old; I was taking the eggs/milk out of the fridge by myself, and I broke 4+ eggs and spilt the milk; I knew we were poor so I remember crying for a good half hour about that one.

It's probably too late to teach your son about money, especially since you're enabling him by giving him a second chance. It sounds like he'll unfortunately have to learn that the hard way. Keep giving him money and he'll just find a way to exploit it.

This is more of a parenting question than a finance one BTW. If it were me, I would cut him off, and the only way he'll be able to get money from me is if he lives at home and shows me his grades every semester.


(3) there are 2 ways to learn the value of $$
the hard way, being poor, feel the pain of lack of $$, or learn to be demanding, aggressive, inspired to make more $$.

rent a ferrari for him for a weekend, take him to tour some millon-dollor houses, show him what $$ can buy, and let him understand what it's like being a $10/hour teller for the rest of his life. he will learn how to use $$ wisely.

don't force him back to school, let alone medical school. doctors will faint if they know how much a half-decent, no degree programmer can earn, and how easy their lives are.


(4) This is almost the same story as mine. To make a long story short. I too went to college. 40k a year for 4 years plus assorted yearly expenses, rent, stipend...ect... I got kicked out for bad grades by year 2, I bounced around in the same town with none of my friends even knowing I wasn't enrolled. My parents thought I was going to other schools to take classes not being offered at my own University. After the 4 years were up, I told them I graduated. Went home and proceeded to fake apply to graduate school. After a few months of this, I couldn't keep lying to my folks and came clean.

Sure there was a lot of tears and woulda shouldas, but they supported me and said that the money wasn't important and that they would continue to support me in what I wanted to do. I enrolled into a local second tier school and proceeded to salvage what credits I could. 6 quarters later, I really graduated with little fanfare and got a job with a national investment firm as a stockbroker trainee.

That was nearly 20 years ago. Today I am still in that first job and one of the bigger stockbrokers in Southern California. I have a great life with all the trimmings, wife, kids, dogs, houses, and cars. I can honestly say that without my parents standing by and supporting me I would not be where I am today.

All is not lost, it's never too late to turn your life around.


(5) Children need to learn that their actions (either good or bad) have consequences. He partied too much at school and got kicked out (1st bad action). He basically defrauded you out of money that you intended for his tuition (2nd bad action). He did these things because he didn't think anything significant would happen (no consequences).

All parents love their children and want to protect them from the stress, problems, and sorrows that unfortunately are part of life. If you gloss over his behavior now, his reckless attitude will continue and in fact be reinforced.

If you truly do love your son, he must learn to be responsible, self-sufficient and goal directed. Coddling and protecting him will not teach these values. Someday you will not be around to save him. All he will have are the values and qualities he learned from you. The sooner he learns these things, the better his life will be. In the future (ten or fifteen years down the road) he will love and appreciate you for teaching him this.

Offer him the choice of moving back home with you, paying you back the money he stole, and possibly enrolling in a local communtiy college (inexpensive) to see if he can get good grades and adapt a serious attitude about study. If he will not do these things, cut him off and explain to him that he is on his own with no further financial support from you.

I know this will be hard for you. Sometimes being a good parent means having your children hate you for a while.

(000)http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/TasteAndSee/ByDate/2007/2168_12_Ways_to_Love_Your_Wayward_Child/

Should we buy house now?

http://www.fatwallet.com/forums/finance/981293/

http://www.businessweek.com/lifestyle/content/dec2009/bw2009127_753974.htm

(1) anyway, for most Savvy FWers, they would rather have a low purchase price in a HIGH interest rate environment, because we can find creative ways to finance, or just pay in cash,,,,

but for the AVERAGE person, who needs and depends on a mortgage, and will not have the cash to PIF or the savvy to get financing in alternate ways, I agree that buying one now, at the current prices and current interest rates makes sense.

(2)Whatever the media says - get ready to do the opposite.

(3) You can renegotiate the interest rate after you buy the house - refinancing.
You cannot renegotiate the purchase price after you buy the house, with the exception of the "Making Home Affordable" program. And we all know how easy that program is to use.

.........

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

中文书

绝对隐私 --- 安顿
旧爱新欢 --- 陈彤

《春天来到昙华林》
《万物生长》

冯唐
  冯唐,男,1971年生于北京。协和医科大学临床医学博士,妇科肿瘤专业,美国Emory大学工商管理硕士。现居香港,就职于麦肯锡公司(McKinsey&Co),从事旧时被称为军师、幕僚或师爷的工作。已出版长篇小说《万物生长》、《十八岁给我一个姑娘》、《北京北京》、《欢喜》,散文集《猪和蝴蝶》、《活着活着就老了》。

陈彤,现供职中国青年报社,北京师范大学毕业,居北京。 以紧贴时尚生活的快意文字行走江湖,时而深遂婉约、隽永细腻,时而快意情仇、诙谐幽默,受到广大读者的喜爱。
  主要作品:
  曾出版随笔集《当男人说想你的时候》《女人的幸福与什么有关》《看破红尘爱红尘》《有多少爱可以胡来》《左手握右手》《忽然受宠》《没有人知道你是一条狗》《旧爱新欢》《冰鲜》等;短篇小说集《我们都是木头人》《镶在日子上的金边变成了钱》,长篇小说 《我愿意》《男人底线》《风情万种》《无限怀念有限悲伤》《灰姑娘》等。另有《向韩国美女学什么》《人生如秀场》等书已在海外发行。
  电视剧本:
  《新结婚时代》(与王海鴒合作)
  《男人底线》(与王海鴒合作)
  《马文的战争》(独立编剧)


方方

1975年开始写诗。1982年发表小说处女作《大篷车上》。出版作品集有《大篷车上》、《十八岁进行曲》、《江那一岸》、《一唱三叹》、《行云流水》等。早先的作品以反映青年人的生活和心理为主。1987年发表《风景》(《当代作家》1989年3期),获1987—1988年全国优秀中篇小说奖,被批评界认为“拉开‘新写实主义’序幕”。自此发表的《祖父在父亲心中》、《行云流水》、《桃花灿烂》、《乌泥湖年谱》等一系列作品,均受好评。已出版小说、散文集约60多部,新近出版有小说集《春天来到昙华林》。她着重描写底层人物的生存景状,善于刻画卑琐丑陋的病态人生,以冷峻的眼光剖析人性的弱点,探索生命的本真意义。语气中常透露着一种冷嘲和尖刻,在简洁明快、舒畅淋漓的叙述中蕴含着敏锐的洞察力和深逮的人生思考。

Monday, February 8, 2010

女人性高潮男人有多在乎?

 http://www.bcbay.com/headline/newsViewer.php?nid=23147&id=26917&dcid=34

很多男人在做爱之后,都喜欢问女友,你到高潮了吗?你有了几次高潮?甚至一些男人尽力延长自己的时间,在女友满足或者达到高潮以后才让自己释放出来。他们认为,只有带给女人满足,他们才真的可以感觉到一种满足。正所谓你快乐所以我快乐。

  问问身边朋友们的意见,有的人说:“男人觉得给女人带来了高潮就是从根本上征服了她。”也有人说:“每个男人都想让女人记住自己,尤其在床上,想做女人的上帝。”

  还有的朋友说,他们希望能够带给自己的女友高潮。

  因为他爱她,他希望可以让她感觉到快乐。他愿意给她所能够给予的一切快乐,尤其是在性这样一个灵肉合一的时刻,他当然很在意自己是不是真的那么合适,是不是可以让她感觉到满足、快乐,有时候在这里面也包含了征服和成就感。而无论是什么事情,只要你带给别人快乐,自己的心情当然也是快乐的。

  作为男人,他们大都希望自己在床上以一个主动的、阳刚的征服者姿态出现。看到他的爱人陶醉在他带来的快乐中,当然也会感觉到满足,惬意。这也是男性力量的炫耀,作为一个男人,不论是在生活中,事业上,还是在性方面,他都希望自己充满了力量。性是炫耀男性能力与魅力的一个很重要的方面。性能力的出色,可以让他充满自信和肯定自我。所以,他自然会关心他所爱的人的快乐,也是他对自己能力的关心与证明。

  当然,也有很多男人并不在意,和自己的爱人在一起的时候,那些熟悉的环境,熟悉的人,熟悉的动作和语言,把他们变成了“快枪手”,加上平日工作的劳累与烦恼,做爱更多地只是发泄而非享乐。

  这里我要说的是,无论什么样的感情关系都是在不停的变化当中,如果你希望保持良好的关系和情感状态,都需要精心的维持、培养。做爱,是和爱人最亲密的时刻,也是可以培养感情的时刻。你的温柔,你的关切,都会被你的爱人留意到,并且感觉到更加满足与快乐。

华尔街日报:我们简直吓瘫了 愿上帝保佑窝囊的美国

华尔街日报:我们简直吓瘫了 愿上帝保佑窝囊的美国
本文网址:http://news./2010/2/6/gb2312_75902.html

http://bbs.creaders.net/stock/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=446872

  你知道有句老话说“有什么样的人民,就有什么样的政府”。以下是我根据白宫2011年财政预算写的修订版:“有什么样的人民,就有什么样的政府和预算。”

  毕竟,我们是个窝囊的国家,一直就有个窝囊政府。如今我们还有个窝窝囊囊的预算草案,这是窝囊预算程序的第一步。

  我知道“窝囊”这个字眼肯定挺刺人的。不过想想看。窝囊就是面对危险觉得害怕──而不是该出手时就出手。

  而在我们国家所面临的财政危机问题上──犹如自杀一般的12.5万亿美元债务,我们简直就吓瘫了。

  想一想这个3.8万亿美元规模的预算提案中的一些数字。我们的经济停滞不前,但预算却比去年膨胀了8%。我们的开支比收入多1.3万亿美元。另外还得支付2,500亿美元的利息。

  当然,预算中也有不少好东西,我们觉得那是应当应份的。其中有2.2万亿美元的社会保险、医疗保险和医疗补助费用,大家打心眼儿里喜欢这些开支,以至我们的政治家们将之定为“强制性的”。

  另有7,440亿美元国防开支,这可是深思熟虑、精打细算的,因此也多少有点“强制”意味。

  幸运的是,预算中还大笔一挥列出了又一笔1,000亿美元创造就业的“刺激”开支。毕竟,谁敢说自己用不着就业呢?

  谢天谢地,我们已经想出法子支付这一大堆费用了──哦,其实是三分之二的费用。(剩下的三分之一得去借。)只要继续对公司和有钱人征税就行了。

  对此谁会有异议呢?没错,有钱人也许会,不过他们在选民中占不了太大比例。所以现在银行得交新的“责任费”,单独免税项目要受限,布什政府出台的减税政策也要撤销。

  2011年预算基本上就是这个样子──由窝囊的政治家们编制,给窝囊的民众他们想要的。

  政治家们明白如此巨额预算赤字是大错特错,但他们没有任何作为。跟知道赤字大有问题但无动于衷的大多数美国人一样。我们都太害怕、也太自私,而不去做该做的事。

  看看白宫和国会的提案──要建立一个18人的两党联合委员会削减赤字。征税和开支或许是国会最基本的职责。但显而易见,我们的国会议员却没有足够的胆量去好好实施。

  尽管去骂那些政治家好了,不过先得骂自己。他们是你们选出来的──而且要是他们显示出勇气、而不是一副窝囊相,你们很可能就不会选他们了。你们会把票投给承诺削减福利的政治家吗?会选那种发誓决不会为你家乡的特殊地方建设项目提供资金的政治家吗?

  历史经验表明你们不会这么干。所以,最终窝囊的民众会安于拿出窝囊提案的窝囊政治家。

  明年我们的国家将背负约14万亿美元债务──平均每个美国人4.5万美元。

  面对如此吓人的数目,我们只能寄希望于美国拿出点勇气来。但你们的州长、国会议员甚至你们的总统都拿不出这份勇气。

  对于你们这群窝囊废来说,也就只能这样了。
  
  (编者按:本文作者Evan Newmark曾在华尔街工作了20余年,目前已远离各大投行、自己在进行股票投资。本栏目文章选自他在Deal Journal上的博客Mean Street。栏目内容都与华尔街有关。)

Saturday, February 6, 2010

人在北美:老爸不好当,女儿哭了我投降!

人在北美:老爸不好当,女儿哭了我投降!
温哥华港湾 2010-02-05 18:04:09

女儿大了,活动日渐增多,实在受不了随时要接送她参加各项活动,计划一旦女儿16岁,拿上了驾照,送一辆车给她,既作为16岁这个大生日的礼物,又可以免去自己三天两头当司机的苦恼。

女儿满16岁的那天,问老爸有什么表示,咱故作大方,说给她买辆车。本以为女儿会欢呼雀跃,但女儿对汽车根本提不起劲来,半年的驾校和平时在家驾驶,令女儿见到开车就头疼。

见女儿不要汽车,咱以为孩子大了,会疼人了,还暗自窃喜,可这小兔崽子有自己的小算盘。

女儿提出了一个“小”要求,说是利用复活节长周末,和同学到另一个城市玩三天作为16岁生日的大礼物。

不就是玩三天吗?这么“小”的要求,如果咱拒绝,岂不是没有老爸的胸怀了吗(别想歪了,老爸没胸有怀啊)。问女儿都玩些什么,女儿开心地说:“保密。”

保密就保密吧,飞机票加住宿费,不知道比买一辆汽车要便宜多少呢。咱开心地盘算着小九九,仅这项改变,就为咱省下1万多美刀,何乐不为?


复活节周末要到了,女儿也忙开了,也不知什么时候,她悄悄地把领导的工作做好了。领导动用了国内的关系,帮女儿特地做了一套衣服,还委托人寄到了上海,又托回上海探亲的朋友在复活节前给带回家。

看了这件象雨衣样的服装,咱好奇,觉得如果要买雨衣,也不用花这么大的周折吧。可一旦咱把自己的想法表达出来,领导和女儿把咱笑得够呛,似乎咱是个外星人似的,两人毫不掩饰语言中的轻蔑:“不知道就不要瞎说,这是时装。”

时装?有这样的时装吗?雨衣上还飘了带子,走路不注意,踩了带子非跌个大跟头,再说了,下雨天,带子在地上拖着,有这样设计的吗?是咱不懂还是你们瞎糟蹋东西?

女儿见咱较真了,赶紧拿出了一幅日本动画片人物,里面的独眼人就穿了这样的怪衣服,脸上还戴个面罩,难怪咱还看到了家里有一块漏两个眼的手帕,以为是失火用的防护用品呢,感情是个面罩啊。

“可这日本人穿的衣服是橙色的啊!你这件时装是黄色的,可以代替吗?”咱还替女儿担心着。

女儿不屑地说:“老爸,这就不用你烦了,我自有办法。”

复活节前的一个星期,女儿一直忙活着她的时装。美国真是什么都有,竟然有直接往衣服上喷染的涂料。女儿和领导屁颠颠地出门,买了3瓶罐装橙色涂料,回来一通猛喷,喷得咱心惊肉跳,从小咱就知道,染料这玩意儿致癌,美国的房子密封好,这样喷要死人的啊。

看了涂料罐上的说明,说这种涂料通过了什么安全认定,于人体无毒,而且还不怕洗,喷到衣服上就洗不掉。真想不到,现在化学材料的进步,已经早已超过了咱以前学到的知识了。但不管怎样,咱要求女儿,喷染好的衣服,无论如何,不可以直接接触到皮肤穿。

涂料喷染有一个大问题,没喷两下,涂料罐就没有了压力,一罐涂料,就只能喷两条带子。见没有了涂料,娘俩又开车出门去买,用完再买,不停地买,结果,完成一件“雨衣作品”,竟然用掉了8个涂料罐。

看女儿每天兴头头地忙碌那件“雨衣”,咱调侃到:衣服的成本才几十元人民币,可染衣服的钱却是制作衣服成本的数倍了。女儿争辩到:这不是她的错,谁让妈妈叫人做衣服的时候不用橙色的布呢?

这件“雨衣”,自然把女儿复活节的活动提到了议事日程上来了,原来,女儿和同学要看日本动漫展。

可恶的日本人,上次老婆不在家的时候,女儿看日本动漫展就把咱折腾的够呛,这次又来了。据女儿介绍,这样的动漫展在美国全国各个城市巡回展览,有痴迷的孩子,能放弃了上学,而追随展览,游走于各个城市。看美国搞所谓的个性培养,都培养了一些疯子啊。

没办法,已经答应了女儿要送大礼,现在是在表态当好爸爸的机会了。

和女儿商量日程、住宿、时间以及同去的小朋友,好在举办日本动漫展的城市并不远,离咱家也就80多公里,咱开了车就可以送她和小朋友到目的地了。谈判的关键地方是金钱投资的问题,一伺谈到这个问题,咱才知道,女儿这辈子是吃定了咱。

在买了门票、一大堆食物以及给予了可能发生的小费后(已经有100刀了,把咱心痛得不行),女儿还要求再给 250刀。

250刀啊!你小兔崽子当咱是个肉头250啊?咱不答应了。女儿马上开始了进攻:“你如果买一辆车给我要花多少钱?”

“不错,买车的钱是比你这次玩要花更多钱,可你能保证以后不要咱给你买车吗?”咱愤愤不平地战斗着,已经看到领导站在女儿一方了。

“可是,你如果你现在给我买车,就要付保险费,小孩子的保险费很高,你早就告诉我了,那么,我迟买车省下来的保险费应该很多吧?”女儿振振有词。

嘿!这个小兔崽子,把咱平时叮咛了小孩子小心开车、以防保险费上涨等事宜,竟然用来了对付她老爸了,真把咱气得不行,伶牙俐齿的咱,也给说得哑口无言。

领导在一旁鼓动着女儿:“快,快Hug一下你老爸。老爸心一软,就同意了。”

“甭来这套,别以为你们这样就可以打垮咱的斗志,你们这些技俩,咱早就领教过了,咱不----同----意。”怎么?咱的口气发软了?是女儿把咱搂得喘不过气来了吧?

晕晕乎乎,手就往钱包里伸了。

领导和女儿,带着胜利的微笑,收拾行李去了。

周五复活节是假日,本来想好好睡个懒觉,但女儿的好朋友一早就陆续到了咱家,睡梦中就听了孩子们的吵闹声,9点多,女儿就把咱拽起来了,睁眼一看,吓了一跳,家里多了几个妖魔鬼怪,一个女孩的眼睛,涂得比熊猫眼还大,头上还飘了一头白发,也不知道是个啥鬼,反正孙悟空是没见过,如果见过,一定会把咱家的擀面棍拿来往那些鬼怪头上抡了。咱女儿也不落后,那件“雨衣”,拖了几条长长的带子,还有一只眼,带了眼罩,看上去,咱恨不得把这个“独眼龙”送人算了。孩子们都不耐烦了,硬让咱马上送她们到旅馆去。

美国长大的孩子一般比较重视技能的培养,从网上,孩子们就查到了举办地时间安排、展厅位置等和动漫展一切相关的信息,于是,几个孩子预订了和展厅在一个建筑物的宾馆。上车后,女儿递给咱一张从家到宾馆的汽车行进图,这帮孩子,啥都安排好了,剩下的,就是大人们出钱出力,按照她们的计划,象个250一样,傻呵呵地往套子里钻就是了。

一个小时的功夫,就到了宾馆,只见宾馆周围人山人海,一个个都是打扮得怪里怪气,和进入了人间地狱没有区别。

宾馆门口全是车,保卫不停地驱赶着停在门口的汽车。看这情形,这个宾馆不知道赞助了多少钱给动漫展,想动漫展这样的赚钱,同时还可以赚宾馆和其他商人的赞助费,实在气愤啊!天底下就是这样的不公平,有钱人越有钱,象咱这样的穷人,花了钱,还被人支来调去(门口的门卫又撵人了)。

孩子们很快回来告知,说房间还没有预备好,咱赶紧到前台,和接待人员交涉。接待人员喜气洋洋,一边故作夸张地表扬着孩子们鬼怪样的穿着,一边乐呵呵地和登记的人员周旋。孩子们那份打扮,被这样的表扬再次刺激,一下就融入了过节般的火热之中。

女儿一下就觉得咱是个多余的人了,马上挥手叫“拜拜”了。咱看自己的装束,似乎是真正的 “外乡人”,此处几乎没有自己的立足之地了,看行李已经运来,又担心门外的汽车被拖走,赶紧和女儿及小朋友们打了招呼,拜拜您呐。

女儿不在家的日子真好,享受两人世界,一天很快就过去了,晚上没事,帮朋友忙交税的事宜,9:30过了,手机突然响起,一看,是女儿。好孩子,睡觉前还给打个电话报平安,不枉咱幸苦一场。

“daddy,”电话一接通,那头就传来了哭声,而且,哭声越来越大。

“别哭,别哭,快告诉老爸,都发生了什么事?”咱听了电话里的哭声,一下把魂都吓飞了。

“我的钱包掉了。”女儿总算说出话来了,咱悬着喉咙口的心也落回了肚子里。还好,没有出车祸、被绑架什么的,如果真那样,咱这辈子估计没法活了。

“别哭了,告诉老爸,是怎么掉的?”咱一反常态,一下变得温柔无比,也不知触动了心底里哪根弦,说话的腔调,连自己都觉得奇怪了,怎么一天之内,自己就变成一个好老爸了呢?

通过女儿断断续续的唏嘘声,咱明白了孩子为啥哭泣。

晚上9点多了,一帮孩子还出门玩开心,这不,到了咖啡馆,也不知道几个孩子都买了啥,反正是老爸的钱,不花白不花,女儿买完东西,把钱包随手放桌子上,没两分钟,回头,钱包不见了。这下,孩子傻眼了,讨价还价从老爸那里弄来的钞票,转眼送给了“三只手”。女儿四下寻找,到哪里能够找到嘛?于是,就只好找她该死的老爸了。

“你可以和同学借一下,等回来老爸给你还上,这样好吗?”咱极尽温柔,尽量以天塌下来有老爸给顶着的语气安慰着女儿(她老爸个高,就配干顶天立地的活)。

“同学们都说,没有多带钱。”女儿可怜巴巴地说着,同时,又补充了一句:“我已经把住饭店的钱给同学了,” 咱从女儿补充的话中,就知道她是啥意思了,也就是说,损失并不是最大的。

“等着,别关手机,老爸给你送钱去,”豪情万丈,柔情四起,咱一下感到了自己的伟岸。

赶紧穿衣服,看皮夹里还有前几天刚取的几百块现金,对了领导说: “咱这就去救你女儿出苦海。”

出门飞车,凭白天残存的记忆,一个小时的路程,咱40分钟就“飞”到了。

一看表,10:20分。

再看饭店周围,好一番灯火阑珊不夜城的光景。

也不是个节日,沿街的树都装饰了彩灯,马路周围,充斥了人群,绝大多数都是teenage的孩子,打扮得怪里怪气,男孩子、女孩子追逐嬉戏,欢声笑语,哪里还看到一片经济萧条的哀鸿啊。

饭店和周围的各家店铺,都张灯结彩,音乐声吵得人心烦。稍小一点的孩子,都有家长陪着,尽情地享受着日本动漫带来的欢乐。还有全家出动的,看那白花花的胡子老头,搀扶着腿脚不便的老太,跟着嬉闹的孩子,咱就感叹了:这帮老美傻冒,都这把年纪了,还来凑这个热闹,干嘛呢?

电话拷女儿,一拷就通,这个兔崽子,以前咱拷她的电话,几乎没一次开机的,从来都是她拷咱,就象扑克牌里A尖吃老K那么坦然。

女儿出现在饭店门口,还带着一点悲伤,也不知道那份悲伤是不是装给老爸看的,但不管如何,见到了女儿,心里总有说不出的高兴,好在人还没有丢。

一边搂了女儿,一边忙不迭的从口袋里掏皮夹子,问需要多少钱。

女儿也不贪心,就只要掉了的数目。

赶紧把钱掏出来,还加上一点钱(乘机讨好),再一次搂了女儿说:“钱掉了不要紧,女儿可不能掉,咱就只有一个女儿啊。记住,你这次出来就是开心的,千万不要不开心,痛快地玩啊!不过,回家得听话,完成自己的作业,好吧?”咱一定要抓住实时教育的机会,虽然咱知道,咱的话功力有限,但此时不说,等以后再说,那和放屁没有区别。

钱拿到手了,女儿也没有和咱继续待的愿望了,咱只好灰溜溜得掉头回家了。

回家的路上,一路思绪万千,咱怎么这么贱,对谁,咱也没有在递上钱的同时,还递上一份讨好的笑容,养孩子,还养出罪过来了。

这辈子,咱是死定了,永远跳不出孩子给咱安排的命运了。

三天的动漫展,除了那天晚上的电话,女儿竟然没有再打一个电话来。直到别的家长接孩子到咱家门口,才接到女儿要开门的电话,幸幸苦苦,就养了这么个白眼狼。

女儿一进家门,一下就躺在了地上,大叫一声:“累死了!”

看那个狼狈相,能感觉到那份玩的幸苦。出门时整齐的时装也皱巴巴脏兮兮的了,眼罩就一根带子挂头上,身上背的大包小包,手上提的花里胡哨,头上还顶着一顶小丑帽,都什么打扮,这是咱女儿吗?咱怎么有一个要饭的女儿呢?

再看看买的一堆破烂货,咱这下感到了心痛哦。一个破布包,就一个卡通人物在上面,竟然要35刀,比咱皮质电脑包还贵;那个小丑帽,15刀,耐克运动帽也没那么贵啊;还有那几件T恤,一件竟然要20刀,咱年轻的时候,哪有什么T恤嘛,不都叫“老头衫”吗,1块钱人民币一件,现在好,画一个鬼在上面,就20美金,这也忒宰人了吧。

那什么的,那个铁圈圈干什么的?什么,戒指?5美金?你疯了?5美金你到中国,买一箩筐这样的铁圈圈来了,看这个圈圈,能戴手指上吗?戴手指头上还磨破了皮了。老爸不懂?你才不懂呢,至少,老爸知道,5美金可以买份盒饭了。

还有那一串珠子,干啥用的?手镯?怎么戴啊?绕手上?多少钱?啥,25刀?又值多少盒饭啦?(自己心里的话)

实在无法对话了,再对下去,咱心脏病要犯了,这堆破烂,花了几百刀,这日本鬼子蒙人也太狠了吧。

女儿又拿出一张画片,说是非常珍贵,问为什么,女儿告知,是日本来的艺人亲自签名的。什么?艺人签名?不都是动画里的人物嘛,怎么会有真人的呢?

听了半天,咱也没明白,估计是制片商为了扩大影响,故意用一些真人,代替动漫中的人物,随巡回展骗钱用。至于为什么这张片片值钱,是因为,女儿她们排了4 个小时,才排到被这个真人“骗子”签名队伍的中间(medium of the line),可想这个队伍是如何的长了,也可想,女儿为什么累了----一群傻冒啊!

“哦!对了,老爸,再给20块钱。”女儿突然想起了说。

“为什么啊?”咱一下捂紧了口袋。

“我向别人还借了20块钱,”女儿的语气很轻松。

“我给了你那么多钱,你为什么还向别人借钱?”要知道,老爸出门,一杯果茶都舍不得喝,你小子竟然好,买一堆破烂,还湖吃海喝,欠一屁股债,竟然要老爸来还。

“你给的钱不够,XXX花的钱比我还多呢!”女儿理由似乎很充分。

“你又不是盖茨的女儿,你和别人比什么嘛?”咱对女儿这样的态度非常气愤。

“你不是说要我开心地玩的吗?而且,如果你现在给我买车,车保险费会更贵,我都帮你省了保险费了。”女儿比咱还气愤。

又来了,又拿保险费来说事。

“你…你…你一天就把一年的保险费给用了,”咱都给气结巴了。

“没有,如果你帮我买一辆车,再加上我的名字,肯定比我这次要的钱更多!”女儿似乎很了解行情,说话理直气壮。

“你…你…算了,不就20块钱吗,给你,不和你争了。”硬着头皮,又给了20 刀。

女儿开心了,和领导进屋展示战利品去了。领导呆呵呵地还一股劲地夸这个好、那个帅的,就剩下咱一个人在客厅里生气了。

唉!这个家,这个日子,咱还咋过呢?