李开复谈家庭教育：给中国父母的四个建议(图) 综合新闻
http://bbs.creaders.net/child/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=428916
作者：李开复
今年送女儿去读大学的时候，我曾写过一封信给她，后来这封信公布在我的博客上，引起了很大反响。很多人问我为什么喜欢写信，我觉得写信是一个很好的模式，比言语或电话更能清楚地传达自己的理念，而且信可以长久地保留，不断重温。我父亲以前就常写信给我，现在我书房里还有五六十封，每几年我都会把它们拿出来阅读一下，觉得弥足珍贵。虽然今天是电子邮件和电话的时代，但用写信的方式来传达一些深思熟虑的想法，让孩子永久留下珍贵的纪念，是一个很不错的渠道。
给女儿的那封信最开始仅仅感念于有太多话想对她说，但是后来决定把它在博客上发表，是因为我觉得中国的学生和父母读了这封信或许会有所启发。除了给女儿的那些建议，我还以自己为人父母十多年的感受，以及作为父母的孩子四十多年的感受，总结了四个建议跟大家分享。
一、多称赞，少批评；多鼓励，少惩罚
批评中长大的孩子，责难他人 惩罚中长大的孩子，自觉有罪
称赞中长大的孩子，懂得感恩 认可中长大的孩子，喜欢自己
在我给女儿的那封信里，毫无保留地描述了从她的出生到大学我们之间的父女感情，这种正面的情感交流和表达，是对孩子的一种认可和鼓励，在孩子成长时父母应该持有这样的态度。然而也有很多家长，包括我自己过去也忍不住用惩罚、批评甚至威胁、恐吓的方式去教导孩子。
如果一个孩子在批评的环境中长大，就可能会潜移默化地用批评的态度来解决沟通问题；如果孩子做得不好就要受到惩罚或被威胁，就只有压抑自己的恐惧，否定自己的情感，来换取父母的认同。这样的管教之下，孩子可能会很听话，但是也会缺乏自信，好奇心受到压抑，无法体谅他人的情绪，存在很多情感的缺陷和问题。
对小一点的孩子，尤其是涉及到道德或责任方面的问题时可以适当惩罚，但是有一点是千万不可以惩罚的，那就是失败。在人的成长过程中，最多的教训就是从失败中得到的，如果从小就告诉孩子失败很可耻，他就可能不承认失败，或是隐藏自己的失败，甚至做出不诚信的行为，而不会从失败中检讨、学习、成长。
相对来讲，我们应该给予孩子更多的鼓励和肯定。我11岁刚到美国时不会讲英文，几乎没有任何值得夸奖的地方，但是校长却牺牲自己的午餐时间为我补习，有一次数学课老师问1/7是多少，我很快说出了以前背的答案，老师和同学都夸奖我是数学天才，我虽然不是数学天才，但在这样的鼓励下，充满了自信，而且对数学产生了浓厚的兴趣。这就是美国教育的特点，它非常鼓励优点，而不去批评缺点。当时我的数学很好，美国历史却很糟，老师并没有因此打击我，知道我英文不好，甚至允许我考试的时候把试卷带回家去查字典来做，相信我不会去偷看书。这样的信任和鼓励，反而激励了我学好这门功课的决心，这件事给了我学习的勇气，也让我生出责任感和荣誉感。所以我觉得这样一种正面的教育才能够真正帮助孩子。
二、多信任，少严管；多放权，少施压
严管中长大的孩子，无法独立 施压中长大的孩子，常常忧虑
信赖中长大的孩子，信人信己 放权中长大的孩子，深具责任
在严厉管教下长大的孩子，会缺乏独立的能力和管理时间、管理自己的能力，一旦进入大学没有人再帮他策划，就会迷失自我，无所适从。所以家长应该随着孩子的长大而逐渐放权。三五岁的时候告诉他们怎么做，七八岁的时候给他们一些授权，读了大学以后，他们就应该完全做自己的主人。很多父母认为自己是为了孩子好才要去管他，但是我有四个应该放权的理由。
第一，父母不见得懂孩子的这一代，可能并不像孩子那样知道自己想要什么。
第二，如果父母帮孩子做了太多决定，反而会造成他们日后责任心的缺失。
第三，如果父母管教太多，就会淹没孩子自己的声音，他们会找不到自己的兴趣，失去自信。我在大学演讲的时候，常常有学生说你总告诉我们要追随自己的心，可是我不知道自己的心是什么。如果太严管，可能就会把孩子变成这样的机器。
第四，如果施压太多，会给孩子沉重的负担。今天的孩子有很多心理问题，有的甚至严重到自杀、抑郁症，这都是在巨大压力下造成的，父母对孩子一定不要过分施压，而应有解压的责任。
我知道女儿对成绩非常敏感，考虑到各种因素(例如高昂的学费)而对自己要求很高，当感觉到她有太深的责任感和太大的压力时，我在给她的信里说了一句话，很多学生说他们很喜欢，“成绩只是一个很无聊的分数，它是给那些爱慕虚荣的人拿去炫耀的，或者给那些慵懒的人去畏惧的。”这句话可能不适合每一个学生，有些学生还是要培养责任感的，但是我有必要告诉女儿，我永远不会刻意地看她的成绩。
几个月前，女儿问我是学日文还是韩文好，我跟她说两个都没有用。但是后来我很后悔，就告诉她虽然你的父亲说日文韩文都没有用，但是你都可以去选。我告诉她要追随自己的心，去尝试很多事，因为每一件事情都是一个点，在人生未来的某一天，你会有机会把这些点连在一起，画成一条优美的曲线。在我个人成长过程中，有件事意义重大，就是四岁多时我决定不要读幼儿园而去读小学，我的父母答应只要考得上就让我读，最后我考上了。这是我第一个重要的人生决定，我因此意识到自己不是父母的附属品，而是一个有决策权力的人。放权会培养孩子的自信，在信赖中长大的孩子会相信自己，以后也会相信别人。在放权的环境中长大，孩子也会具有独立自主的能力，深具责任感。
三、多授渔，少授鱼；多做，少说
传道中长大的孩子，失去判断 解惑中长大的孩子，仅能记得
互动学习中长大的孩子，才真懂得 以身作则中长大的孩子，言行一致
在中国的环境中，无论是父母还是老师都有一个常犯的错误，就是说教，说教是中国传统的两三千年前的形式，但是在21世纪已经过时了。传道式的教育之下，孩子可能会记住，但不会真的懂得。说教可能产生两种后果，一是孩子不认可你，变得叛逆；二是他记住了父母的说教，同时也失去了自己的判断力。仅仅解惑的孩子同样也不会真正懂得。
要想真正懂得，一方面要试着经过互动的学习，让孩子知道没有事情是绝对的，一个问题可以从很多不同的角度来看；另一方面要“授之以渔”，教孩子思考的能力、学习的能力和解决问题的能力。大学中的学习最重要的就是当你把所有学科的知识全部忘光的时候那些剩下来沉淀在你心中的，那才是教育的本质。
我常鼓励我的女儿参加辩论会时去辩论她不相信的那一方，多想一下她不是自然想出来的那一面，这样才能理解事情是有两面的，没有绝对的是非黑白。当人面对两面的时候，会更深刻地思考问题，另外，这种思考方式也会培养孩子的同理心。
除了这种批判式思维之外，同样重要的是以身作则。有些父母亲会威胁孩子如果再打架就会打他，显而易见这样的教育只会适得其反。父母对孩子的教育，真正沉淀在孩子的心中的是如何做的，而不是如何说的。那些让孩子守时而自己不守时，让孩子讲礼貌而自己不讲礼貌，让孩子讲诚信而自己不讲诚信，让孩子负责而自己不负责的父母都没有做到真正的教育。所以，想让孩子成为什么样的人，就要以身作则，言行一致，为孩子树立一个榜样。我给女儿的信中谈到了以诚待人，多交朋友，无需强求朋友跟自己一样嗜好、一样个性，只要相互真心对待就足够了。我也跟她举了自己的例子，我身边的朋友都个性迥异，但是如果自己都没有做到，我这样说就没有说服力了。
四、多做好朋友，少做严长辈
规矩中长大的孩子，保守胆小 父母附属品的孩子，被动听话
轻松中长大的孩子，乐观快乐 做父母朋友的孩子，爱人爱己
我的父亲是个很好的父亲，他爱国、诚信、非常负责任，但是他从来不跟孩子打成一片，严守着长幼有序的界限。对父母尊敬当然是必要的，但是更重要的是父母要成为孩子的朋友。在这个时代成长，孩子的心中可能会有各种不同的压力，当他们面临问题、困惑和挑战的时候，如果只是觉得父母是高高在上的长辈，就可能避而不谈，慢慢就有了代沟和隔阂。家长也许会觉得孩子太难懂，但其实可能是自己没有放下架子，定了太多规矩。
在太多的规矩和框架之下成长的孩子会胆小、保守、被动，新的时代里这样的人很难达到自己的潜力，也难在优秀的企业或学校脱颖而出。今天我们希望培养的孩子是快乐、乐观的，是能看到一杯水半满而不是半空的，是能够对父母亲有信任彼此倾诉的，是能够爱自己也能爱别人的。
所以我跟孩子在一起时，总告诉自己不要有架子，我的孩子会像朋友那样跟我开玩笑，也有很多话跟我说。以前我都是用电子邮件，但自从要跟女儿沟通之后，我就经常用IM，在IM上，我发现她讲的很多话都是奇奇怪怪的(不管在中国还是美国，都有那么一套九零后的网络语言)，我也学着跟她这样讲，刚开始时她觉得很奇怪，但是后来她告诉我我是一个很可爱的爸爸。其实孩子不但愿意，而且非常渴望做我们的朋友，我们也非常需要他们做我们的朋友，得到他们的信任。今天的孩子很多习惯跟我们已经不一样了，让他们来学我们时代的规矩是很困难的，所以我们要学习他们的。
那是不是就完全不要规矩呢？当然不是这样。规矩可以有，然而：(1)定好规矩，但是首先要把规矩的道理讲清楚，不是盲目地服从；(2)在规矩内孩子有完全的自由；(3)违背了规矩孩子将受到讲好的惩罚；(4)规矩越少越好，才能有启发的作用；(5)孩子越大，规矩越少，放权越多。
这是我的四个建议，希望对大家有一些帮助和启发，中国的未来在中国的青年中，而中国的青年都是我们的骨肉、我们的最爱，所以让我们以后能够彼此勉励，把他们培养成他们最好的自己。
Monday, December 7, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
How Common Credit Mistakes Affect Scores
http://finance.yahoo.com/banking-budgeting/article/108239/fICO-reveals-how-common-credit-mistakes-affect-scores?mod=bb-creditreports
Disclosed for the 1st time, 'damage points' taken off for late payments
Borrowers already knew that late payments hurt their credit scores, but for the first time, they now know the extent of that damage.
Did you max out your credit card? Expect a credit score drop of 10 to 45 points. Declare bankruptcy? Your score will plummet by up to 240 points, and your odds of getting credit will nosedive with it.
The "damage points" data, unveiled recently by FICO, are part of the most revealing glimpse into the firm's once-secret -- and still mysterious -- credit scoring model. The new information discloses how many points borrowers' scores will drop when they make the most-common mistakes.
'Help People Understand' Scores
"I hope this information will help people to better understand FICO scores and the value for them of avoiding credit missteps. It illustrates key points such as the higher your score, the farther it can fall if you stumble," says FICO spokesman Craig Watts. "Getting and maintaining a good score isn't complicated. We all just need to pay our bills on time, keep credit card balances low and take on new debt sparingly. "
The greater transparency about FICO scores is important because American consumers' ability to get credit rises and falls with the number. FICO, the company that pioneered credit scoring, assigns consumers a three-digit number from 300 to 850, depending on how well they handle credit. Other companies also offer scores, but FICO's version is the most widely used by lenders in determining whether a consumer can borrow, and at what rate.
FICO's credit score has been around for decades, but only within the past decade have consumers gradually gained access to theirs. Though the raw numbers can be purchased, how they're figured remains a FICO secret, as closely guarded as the formula for Coca-Cola. Until Thursday, FICO revealed only broad categories of factors influencing the score, but not the number of points at stake for consumers who fail to pay as agreed. The "damage points" information, revealed in a report by personal finance writer Liz Pulliam Weston, will be made available through its myFICO.com Web site starting this weekend.
FICO's information shows that bankruptcy does the most serious damage to a credit score (up to 240 points), followed by foreclosure (up to 160 points) while maxing out a credit card has the least numerical impact (as few as 10 points).
Those with good or excellent credit -- so-called prime borrowers -- put more points at risk with each mistake. For example, someone with an average credit score of 680 who pays a bill 30 days late will see a drop of 60 to 80 points. But for someone with an excellent credit score -- 780 -- that same delinquency can send a FICO score tumbling by 90 to 100 points.
The Cost in Dollars
In order to show just how badly a drop in your FICO score can hurt your wallet, we spoke with members of the home mortgage, auto and credit card lending industries. We presented hypothetical scenarios of a consumer who decided to apply for a $200,000, 30-year mortgage; a $20,000, five-year auto loan and a credit card. While all the industry insiders stressed that a FICO score isn't the only factor in determining who gets credit and at what cost (other factors they cited include the borrower's debt-to-income ratio and whether they have already established a relationship with the lender), they were able to provide an idea of what a borrower who had the following credit scores could expect.
For a Consumer Who Started With a FICO Score of 780:
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer's car loan rate would jump nearly 3 percent, costing the borrower $26 more each month.
•Following a debt settlement, the consumer would pay as much as $109 more each month on a home mortgage.
For a Consumer Who Started With a FICO Score of 680:
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer would pay $41 more each month for a car loan.
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer would pay as much as $95 more each month on a home mortgage.
•Following a debt settlement, the consumer would no longer qualify for a credit card.
Some Surprised By the Details
Consumer advocates say it's important for borrowers to know what can damage their FICO scores. "If they know it in advance, they won't go out and step in a pile of doo-doo. They won't go out and do some of these things," says Linda Sherry, director of national priorities with advocacy group Consumer Action. Even experts found some surprises in today's news. "FICO imposes bigger hits than I would have thought for being maxed out or 30-days late just once, reinforcing my view that it is a cruder, blunter instrument than they like to claim. Nevertheless, it is a powerful, widely used crude blunt instrument," says Ed Mierzwinski, consumer program director for the U.S. PIRG consumer advocacy group.
Of course, knowing the impact on a FICO score and actually avoiding these mistakes are two separate things: Amid rising unemployment and other daily financial struggles, paying bills and staying on-track financially becomes a much bigger challenge for many borrowers.
"Some of these things are out of their control," Sherry says of consumers.
Additionally, as Weston points out, consumers with identical FICO scores can have different credit histories. That means the same slip-up -- such as maxing out a credit card -- could have different impacts on consumers who have the same FICO score. In the examples they provided, FICO assumed each borrower had several active major credit cards, a mortgage, car loan and student loans.
Sherry acknowledges the benefit of putting a number to a financial blunder. "I don't think we necessarily knew the numbers that a bankruptcy could apply to a credit score," Sherry says.
Helping You Make Better Decisions
While knowing the numbers may not keep you filing for bankruptcy if given no other choice, the information may help you make the best decision when faced with a bad situation.
FICO scores -- and the access to credit they provide -- are a valuable asset to consumers and supply a safety net when incomes are stretched. It's an asset that needs to be protected, Sherry says, even if job loss or catastrophic illness makes bill paying problematic.
"In that period of time, paying down debt is the last thing on your mind. Paying the minimum payment may also be the last thing on your mind, but you'll be doing yourself a big favor if you do," Sherry says.
Disclosed for the 1st time, 'damage points' taken off for late payments
Borrowers already knew that late payments hurt their credit scores, but for the first time, they now know the extent of that damage.
Did you max out your credit card? Expect a credit score drop of 10 to 45 points. Declare bankruptcy? Your score will plummet by up to 240 points, and your odds of getting credit will nosedive with it.
The "damage points" data, unveiled recently by FICO, are part of the most revealing glimpse into the firm's once-secret -- and still mysterious -- credit scoring model. The new information discloses how many points borrowers' scores will drop when they make the most-common mistakes.
'Help People Understand' Scores
"I hope this information will help people to better understand FICO scores and the value for them of avoiding credit missteps. It illustrates key points such as the higher your score, the farther it can fall if you stumble," says FICO spokesman Craig Watts. "Getting and maintaining a good score isn't complicated. We all just need to pay our bills on time, keep credit card balances low and take on new debt sparingly. "
The greater transparency about FICO scores is important because American consumers' ability to get credit rises and falls with the number. FICO, the company that pioneered credit scoring, assigns consumers a three-digit number from 300 to 850, depending on how well they handle credit. Other companies also offer scores, but FICO's version is the most widely used by lenders in determining whether a consumer can borrow, and at what rate.
FICO's credit score has been around for decades, but only within the past decade have consumers gradually gained access to theirs. Though the raw numbers can be purchased, how they're figured remains a FICO secret, as closely guarded as the formula for Coca-Cola. Until Thursday, FICO revealed only broad categories of factors influencing the score, but not the number of points at stake for consumers who fail to pay as agreed. The "damage points" information, revealed in a report by personal finance writer Liz Pulliam Weston, will be made available through its myFICO.com Web site starting this weekend.
FICO's information shows that bankruptcy does the most serious damage to a credit score (up to 240 points), followed by foreclosure (up to 160 points) while maxing out a credit card has the least numerical impact (as few as 10 points).
Those with good or excellent credit -- so-called prime borrowers -- put more points at risk with each mistake. For example, someone with an average credit score of 680 who pays a bill 30 days late will see a drop of 60 to 80 points. But for someone with an excellent credit score -- 780 -- that same delinquency can send a FICO score tumbling by 90 to 100 points.
The Cost in Dollars
In order to show just how badly a drop in your FICO score can hurt your wallet, we spoke with members of the home mortgage, auto and credit card lending industries. We presented hypothetical scenarios of a consumer who decided to apply for a $200,000, 30-year mortgage; a $20,000, five-year auto loan and a credit card. While all the industry insiders stressed that a FICO score isn't the only factor in determining who gets credit and at what cost (other factors they cited include the borrower's debt-to-income ratio and whether they have already established a relationship with the lender), they were able to provide an idea of what a borrower who had the following credit scores could expect.
For a Consumer Who Started With a FICO Score of 780:
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer's car loan rate would jump nearly 3 percent, costing the borrower $26 more each month.
•Following a debt settlement, the consumer would pay as much as $109 more each month on a home mortgage.
For a Consumer Who Started With a FICO Score of 680:
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer would pay $41 more each month for a car loan.
•Following a 30-day late payment, the consumer would pay as much as $95 more each month on a home mortgage.
•Following a debt settlement, the consumer would no longer qualify for a credit card.
Some Surprised By the Details
Consumer advocates say it's important for borrowers to know what can damage their FICO scores. "If they know it in advance, they won't go out and step in a pile of doo-doo. They won't go out and do some of these things," says Linda Sherry, director of national priorities with advocacy group Consumer Action. Even experts found some surprises in today's news. "FICO imposes bigger hits than I would have thought for being maxed out or 30-days late just once, reinforcing my view that it is a cruder, blunter instrument than they like to claim. Nevertheless, it is a powerful, widely used crude blunt instrument," says Ed Mierzwinski, consumer program director for the U.S. PIRG consumer advocacy group.
Of course, knowing the impact on a FICO score and actually avoiding these mistakes are two separate things: Amid rising unemployment and other daily financial struggles, paying bills and staying on-track financially becomes a much bigger challenge for many borrowers.
"Some of these things are out of their control," Sherry says of consumers.
Additionally, as Weston points out, consumers with identical FICO scores can have different credit histories. That means the same slip-up -- such as maxing out a credit card -- could have different impacts on consumers who have the same FICO score. In the examples they provided, FICO assumed each borrower had several active major credit cards, a mortgage, car loan and student loans.
Sherry acknowledges the benefit of putting a number to a financial blunder. "I don't think we necessarily knew the numbers that a bankruptcy could apply to a credit score," Sherry says.
Helping You Make Better Decisions
While knowing the numbers may not keep you filing for bankruptcy if given no other choice, the information may help you make the best decision when faced with a bad situation.
FICO scores -- and the access to credit they provide -- are a valuable asset to consumers and supply a safety net when incomes are stretched. It's an asset that needs to be protected, Sherry says, even if job loss or catastrophic illness makes bill paying problematic.
"In that period of time, paying down debt is the last thing on your mind. Paying the minimum payment may also be the last thing on your mind, but you'll be doing yourself a big favor if you do," Sherry says.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
7 big money mistakes to avoid (comments)
Posted by Redvioletskydancer Fri Nov 6, 2009 6:50am PST
Those are some good ideas. There are 20 good money saving tips at www.womensave.org link: http://www.womensave.org/tips.php that will help you save all year. They also have phone numbers to call to see if the state comptroller is holding money for you that you could use for the upcoming holiday season and menus to feed a family of 4 on $50 a week. They want women to join their forum and share HEALTHY menus for $50 a week too.
Posted by Cindy Fri Nov 6, 2009 10:42am PST
I'm an avid believer of protecting yourself first, so I heartily agree with #2. Your kids don't always turn out to be the kind of person you want them to be. What happens if after you've raised them to adulthood and paid for their college education and down payments on their homes and whatnot and you find yourself in old age and they decide they don't want to take care of you? Or because you've been providing for them your whole life, they don't know how to provide for themselves and providing for you would be way beyond their means and comprehension. With that in mind, it's in your best interest to pay for your retirement first. I'm actually an optimistic person, but I like to be prepared for the worst.
Posted by Giz Fri Nov 6, 2009 12:41pm PST
For the record "none" and "cindy", I worked 60+ hours a week in college, spread between 2-3 jobs at a time. My siblings all had/have 30 + hour a week jobs while in college and we all paid for our own books, housing and some of our college tuition as well. I, at 26 years old, have a good job and have been paying any non-school related bills 100% by myself ever since the age of 18. I bought my own cars and house and the only debt I have is my mortgage (which I put extra money towards every month). I drove across the country, up the coast and back on my own for 6 weeks when I was 22, camping the whole way, and I paid for everything. Any vacation I took after the age of 16 was financed soley by me.
My parents taught me responsibility better than anyone I know. They also taught me that it was important to provide your children with the best opportunities in life and the only way to do that is to make sure they have access to education. Many kids I know didn't have that access because their parents didn't care enough to think about it and they couldn't balance working enough to afford school along with handling the classes needed to graduate. For the record, I haven't finished school yet. I have a solid career in Real Estate and Marketing that I have been working hard for since the age of 17. I'll finish when I'm ready. At this point, I will of course be paying for everything on my own. That is the path that is best for me.
I have 3 siblings who were better off getting through all of the education they wanted right after high school. That doesn't mean they were being stupid, irresponsible or wasting money. What an ignorant statement. None of us party/partied. My older sister also has a home and car as well as a grad degree she paid for entirely on her own. My little sister and brother both contribute a decent amount to their schooling and finance their own living expenses, study abroad programs, books, food, transportation etc. None of us use credit cards or any other sort of financing that doesn't involve a mortgage.
I learned very well how to provide for myself and had my parents not taken care of me or been there to support me while I was growing and learning to do so, that may not have been the case. They taught me how to use credit wisely, save money, budget, separate want from need, have a good work ethic and balance both work and other life responsibilities. The issue is that many parents don't teach their kids before the age of 18 how to be an adult and are then shocked when they toss them out the door to fend for themselves and they get completely lost and fail. Parents assisting with college tuition has nothing to do with kids not being capable of handling their own lives and finances. The two items are completely separate.
Posted by maryl Fri Nov 6, 2009 2:36pm PST
Take care of yourself first, . . you cannot carry someone else if you are cut at the knees! SAVE,SAVE,SAVE!!!
Posted by B Fri Nov 6, 2009 3:57pm PST
Joy in Seattle, I'm not sorry for you. You decided to have a child so now you need to stop whining and get your stuff together. I don' care if you were married, in a relationship or whatever when you got pregnant. If you decide to bring a child to this world you should know that you have to be able to provide for it, alone if necessary. I do not believe that most Americans don't have money for basic things, because if they have the money to spend it on junk they don't need then I take it they have it for the basics. Oh wait, this is why the economy is down the drain, because they did not have the money and were buying stuff they could not afford anyways. Ooops! Long live the credit card!.
I am a full time student and only my husband works,and he does not make buckets of money. But we still are able to afford all the stuff we need, pay for my books and school supplies, have some fun and save cash and have additional retirement plan to the one he gets through his company. If you think you have to have it all, you will end up in deep red.
I also agree that the whole big name college stuff is overrated because unless you want to work for Fortune 500 company, most employers don't care what school you went to or what your GPA was. Unless you get a free ride, or have rich parents who are either rich enough so that they can pay for retirement and your school or dumb enough to pay for your school only, go to community college, study hard and have good grades there and get a scholarship when you transfer to a four year institution. Works totally ok.
Posted by SUSAN M Fri Nov 6, 2009 5:00pm PST
I disagree with not paying extra on the mortgage. Pull out you amoritization (sp) chart and look and how much of your payment goes to interest vs principal! It will make you sick. Add a bit more and save a few hundred bucks in interest! It is not rocket science. I am 35 and own a modest home but it is nearly paid for. While I will lose my tax deduction, I dont owe enough on my house to make the interest tax deductable over standard deductions. Tax man said I needed to buy a bigger house or have a kid. I choose C- none of the above and take the tax hit. In this economy and last year when I was on medical leave for 6 months of year I thanked God everyday I had small house payments!
Posted by sitter_ragdoll Sat Nov 7, 2009 1:34am PST
B is right. I'm sick of single mothers whining about how poor they are. Maybe you should have thought of that before you got knocked up. My grandmother's husband died in the war and she raised three kids while working 3 jobs to get by so when my co-workers complain about cut hours yet spend 100$ on a slutty halloween costume or go out for lunch everyday, it makes me roll my eyes. you made choices and now you have to live with them.
Those are some good ideas. There are 20 good money saving tips at www.womensave.org link: http://www.womensave.org/tips.php that will help you save all year. They also have phone numbers to call to see if the state comptroller is holding money for you that you could use for the upcoming holiday season and menus to feed a family of 4 on $50 a week. They want women to join their forum and share HEALTHY menus for $50 a week too.
Posted by Cindy Fri Nov 6, 2009 10:42am PST
I'm an avid believer of protecting yourself first, so I heartily agree with #2. Your kids don't always turn out to be the kind of person you want them to be. What happens if after you've raised them to adulthood and paid for their college education and down payments on their homes and whatnot and you find yourself in old age and they decide they don't want to take care of you? Or because you've been providing for them your whole life, they don't know how to provide for themselves and providing for you would be way beyond their means and comprehension. With that in mind, it's in your best interest to pay for your retirement first. I'm actually an optimistic person, but I like to be prepared for the worst.
Posted by Giz Fri Nov 6, 2009 12:41pm PST
For the record "none" and "cindy", I worked 60+ hours a week in college, spread between 2-3 jobs at a time. My siblings all had/have 30 + hour a week jobs while in college and we all paid for our own books, housing and some of our college tuition as well. I, at 26 years old, have a good job and have been paying any non-school related bills 100% by myself ever since the age of 18. I bought my own cars and house and the only debt I have is my mortgage (which I put extra money towards every month). I drove across the country, up the coast and back on my own for 6 weeks when I was 22, camping the whole way, and I paid for everything. Any vacation I took after the age of 16 was financed soley by me.
My parents taught me responsibility better than anyone I know. They also taught me that it was important to provide your children with the best opportunities in life and the only way to do that is to make sure they have access to education. Many kids I know didn't have that access because their parents didn't care enough to think about it and they couldn't balance working enough to afford school along with handling the classes needed to graduate. For the record, I haven't finished school yet. I have a solid career in Real Estate and Marketing that I have been working hard for since the age of 17. I'll finish when I'm ready. At this point, I will of course be paying for everything on my own. That is the path that is best for me.
I have 3 siblings who were better off getting through all of the education they wanted right after high school. That doesn't mean they were being stupid, irresponsible or wasting money. What an ignorant statement. None of us party/partied. My older sister also has a home and car as well as a grad degree she paid for entirely on her own. My little sister and brother both contribute a decent amount to their schooling and finance their own living expenses, study abroad programs, books, food, transportation etc. None of us use credit cards or any other sort of financing that doesn't involve a mortgage.
I learned very well how to provide for myself and had my parents not taken care of me or been there to support me while I was growing and learning to do so, that may not have been the case. They taught me how to use credit wisely, save money, budget, separate want from need, have a good work ethic and balance both work and other life responsibilities. The issue is that many parents don't teach their kids before the age of 18 how to be an adult and are then shocked when they toss them out the door to fend for themselves and they get completely lost and fail. Parents assisting with college tuition has nothing to do with kids not being capable of handling their own lives and finances. The two items are completely separate.
Posted by maryl Fri Nov 6, 2009 2:36pm PST
Take care of yourself first, . . you cannot carry someone else if you are cut at the knees! SAVE,SAVE,SAVE!!!
Posted by B Fri Nov 6, 2009 3:57pm PST
Joy in Seattle, I'm not sorry for you. You decided to have a child so now you need to stop whining and get your stuff together. I don' care if you were married, in a relationship or whatever when you got pregnant. If you decide to bring a child to this world you should know that you have to be able to provide for it, alone if necessary. I do not believe that most Americans don't have money for basic things, because if they have the money to spend it on junk they don't need then I take it they have it for the basics. Oh wait, this is why the economy is down the drain, because they did not have the money and were buying stuff they could not afford anyways. Ooops! Long live the credit card!.
I am a full time student and only my husband works,and he does not make buckets of money. But we still are able to afford all the stuff we need, pay for my books and school supplies, have some fun and save cash and have additional retirement plan to the one he gets through his company. If you think you have to have it all, you will end up in deep red.
I also agree that the whole big name college stuff is overrated because unless you want to work for Fortune 500 company, most employers don't care what school you went to or what your GPA was. Unless you get a free ride, or have rich parents who are either rich enough so that they can pay for retirement and your school or dumb enough to pay for your school only, go to community college, study hard and have good grades there and get a scholarship when you transfer to a four year institution. Works totally ok.
Posted by SUSAN M Fri Nov 6, 2009 5:00pm PST
I disagree with not paying extra on the mortgage. Pull out you amoritization (sp) chart and look and how much of your payment goes to interest vs principal! It will make you sick. Add a bit more and save a few hundred bucks in interest! It is not rocket science. I am 35 and own a modest home but it is nearly paid for. While I will lose my tax deduction, I dont owe enough on my house to make the interest tax deductable over standard deductions. Tax man said I needed to buy a bigger house or have a kid. I choose C- none of the above and take the tax hit. In this economy and last year when I was on medical leave for 6 months of year I thanked God everyday I had small house payments!
Posted by sitter_ragdoll Sat Nov 7, 2009 1:34am PST
B is right. I'm sick of single mothers whining about how poor they are. Maybe you should have thought of that before you got knocked up. My grandmother's husband died in the war and she raised three kids while working 3 jobs to get by so when my co-workers complain about cut hours yet spend 100$ on a slutty halloween costume or go out for lunch everyday, it makes me roll my eyes. you made choices and now you have to live with them.
有一种女人嫁给谁都能幸福
有一种女人嫁给谁都能幸福
http://bbs.creaders.net/romance/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=421766&blog_id=50510
有一种女人，不管她嫁的是建筑工人还是国会议员，她都有能力让自己过得幸福。
我见到明依是在好友的聚会上，一个35岁的女人，中等姿色，学历也不高，却嫁了个气宇轩昂的好老公，
他据说是硕士，后来做家具生意发了家，结婚10年，有一个粉雕玉镯的小女儿，好友说完后半妒半羡地感叹，
嫁到这么好的男人，明依真幸福，我笑着不说话，想来她的故事不会这么简单。
明依嫁给老公的时候，他还是大学里年轻的讲师，站在讲台上激情飞扬地大谈犬儒主义和叔本华，
台下的女生们多数是冲着英俊老师来的，明依全身心的投入和迷恋这份感情，
那时候她当然不会去考虑台上气质非凡的男人名下只有一间 20 平米的筒子楼宿舍。婚后的现状虽然不尽如人意，
但如胶似漆的爱情可以弥补一切。小两口一起在公共用水间洗衣服，一人一头拧床单；在烟熏火燎的楼道里做饭，
饭后老公陪着她边洗碗边聊天；周末手拉手去看场电影或是回婆家吃顿饭。明依觉得小日子虽然清贫，
但一样觉得幸福甜蜜，她把眼光从简陋的家，朴素的衣裳，自己光秃秃的脖子手指上移开，
每月精打细算的捂着手中不多的钱把日子过好，明依做得一手好菜，老公最爱喝她熬的汤，排骨炖莲藕，
鲫鱼萝卜丝，芋头娃娃菜……每次喝的肚儿圆圆才放下碗。看到老公简单满足的微笑，明依觉得，这就是幸福。
大学的谈资论辈终于令老公厌烦了。明依看出了他的心思，鼓励他去经商创业，
那一阵，家里家外的事情全靠明依一手操持，老公在外面联系洽谈，四处求人，有时候碰壁受气，回家难免冲着老婆发泄。
日子比刚结婚那阵更苦，心理压力也大，明依背地里也哭过，当面也和老公吵过，
但每当一早醒来看见老公的头颅孩子一般依恋在自己的肩头，心里便像温水里融化的蜜，暖暖的，甜甜的。
她比以往更加用心操持家务，把 500 元租来的小房间布置得整洁温馨；老公夜归的时候她总在灯下等着，
接下沉重的公文包，递上一杯热茶；临睡前两口子坐在床头聊聊烦心的事情，共同商量解决问题的办法。
怀上孩子的时候，老公的事业刚起步，天天周旋于客户和朋友间，请客吃饭，陪酒，陪玩，
每晚不到深更半夜回不了家。明依非常难过，面前的男人虽然还是熟悉的面孔，却好像完全换了一个灵魂。
他没时间对着大肚子的老婆嘘寒问暖，没精力回应老婆的温存关切，在生活的残酷考验下，
他还原了男人爱事业不爱美人的本质，简直就是一个工作狂。明依觉得自己的温柔克己完全白费了，
眼前的男人已经不是当初自己深爱的那一个，再勉强下去还有什么意义？
定居美国的大姐回来看她，明依哭着告诉她：老公给不了我想要的幸福，我想离婚。
大姐缄默，第二天给她带来一本美国专栏女作家的畅销小集子，里面有一句话让明依有所触动：有一种女人，
不管她嫁的是建筑工人还是国会议员，她都有能力让自己过得幸福。
没错，女人的幸福，为什么要靠男人给呢？每个女人，都应该有让自己，让家庭幸福的能力。
大着肚子的明依向父母求援，请妈妈过来帮忙买菜做饭，照顾这个自己无力兼顾的小家。
她强迫自己不去想烦心的事情，每天吃好睡好，安心养胎；她不再等老公夜归，
不再像以前那样每天缠着他问长问短，不再拿鸡毛蒜皮的小事去烦他；在他偶尔有空的时间里让他搀着自己散步，
彼此取笑着对方为孩子取名字。也怪了，一天天平静安稳地过去，原本觉得天昏暗地的生活，渐渐变得阳光灿烂起来。
女儿快 3 岁了，他们搬了新家。钱都花在房款上了，明依雇了个油漆匠把墙一刷，购置了简单的家具，
就这样凑合着先搬进去了。老公每天回家都能看到一点点新的变化：
客厅里别致的灯罩是用硬纸壳蒙上米色暗红碎花图案的棉布做的；自己到海南出差带回来的椰子，
吃剩的硬壳被巧妙改造成了造型可爱的小猪扑满；卷筒纸用完了，明依给简芯细致地裹上了一层米白色亚麻细布，
教女儿用蜡笔涂鸦，画出五彩的虹，绿的树，蓝色的河流，金色的太阳公公，这样一个 DIY 小笔筒摆在书桌上，
做爸爸的每次看到心里都暖洋洋的。一个原本平凡的空间在明依手里渐渐改头换面，一天比一天丰富，一天比一天有情趣。
汤妮的出现差点儿击碎了明依的幸福梦想。她是老公生意上的重要合伙人之一，年轻，家境富裕，有生意头脑和管
理能力，带着一种咄咄逼人的美和气势。汤妮明显地向老公老公表示好感，根本不在乎他的已婚身份，
男人到了这种地步，不免有些心猿意马，暧昧不明。很多人都来向明依告密，有的是打抱不平，有的纯粹为了看热闹。
明依却还是和以前一样，看自己的书，种自己的花花草草，照顾刚上小学的女儿。在老公回家的时候，
给他送上舒服的拖鞋；在他起床洗漱的时候，提前给他挤好牙膏。她对烹调的兴趣越发浓厚，
时不时来些新奇的花样。比如把香蕉切成小块，浇上酸奶，然后裹上全麦饼干屑；
去凤凰旅游的时候学会了用蒜叶和新鲜芫菜加干辣椒炝炒；跟婆婆学会了做四川泡菜。
种种小创意让在外面吃惯了大鱼大肉的老公回到家来就会忍不住多添一碗饭，赞一句，还是家里的菜好吃。
明依把周末的时间精心策划起来，老公有空的时候，带上孩子，开车到附近的农家乐，踏青，看红叶，
老公没空陪她，她就自己带着女儿去儿童乐园，或是看最新上映的动画大片。每次娘俩儿都开心的手牵手回家，
女儿欢声笑语，明依红光满面。
老公终日担心，如果明依提出那个难堪的问题，他不知道该如何回答。但明依开开心心地过自己的日子，
从来不多问一句。当然明依也有变化：她恢复了几分婚前活泼可爱的样子，穿衣打扮越发精致；
她参加了瑜伽课，学打网球；她组织姐妹旅行团去尼泊尔，回来容光焕发，给女儿带回一条手工绣花的小裙子，
送老公一个乌木镶银的烟灰缸；她甚至开始学习英文，居然可以磕磕巴巴地和美国网友聊天！
这个跟了自己 10 年的女人身上原来还有那么多自己不了解的特质和能量，这一切都让他感觉既陌生又熟悉，并深深为之吸引。
汤妮的事情居然就这么慢慢地淡了，没了，女友去看明依，崇拜无比地追问她处理方式。
明依笑说，见怪不怪，其怪自败。以前我老觉得嫁个好老公就能幸福，
现在看起来，女人的幸福不是靠男人给的。女人要有让自己幸福的能力。热爱生活，照顾好家庭，不冷落自己，
这才是女人真正的幸福。
这话有道理，一个家庭幸不幸福， 80% 以上取决于女主人。有能力让自己幸福，有能力给男人幸福，
才是聪明的好女人
http://bbs.creaders.net/romance/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=421766&blog_id=50510
有一种女人，不管她嫁的是建筑工人还是国会议员，她都有能力让自己过得幸福。
我见到明依是在好友的聚会上，一个35岁的女人，中等姿色，学历也不高，却嫁了个气宇轩昂的好老公，
他据说是硕士，后来做家具生意发了家，结婚10年，有一个粉雕玉镯的小女儿，好友说完后半妒半羡地感叹，
嫁到这么好的男人，明依真幸福，我笑着不说话，想来她的故事不会这么简单。
明依嫁给老公的时候，他还是大学里年轻的讲师，站在讲台上激情飞扬地大谈犬儒主义和叔本华，
台下的女生们多数是冲着英俊老师来的，明依全身心的投入和迷恋这份感情，
那时候她当然不会去考虑台上气质非凡的男人名下只有一间 20 平米的筒子楼宿舍。婚后的现状虽然不尽如人意，
但如胶似漆的爱情可以弥补一切。小两口一起在公共用水间洗衣服，一人一头拧床单；在烟熏火燎的楼道里做饭，
饭后老公陪着她边洗碗边聊天；周末手拉手去看场电影或是回婆家吃顿饭。明依觉得小日子虽然清贫，
但一样觉得幸福甜蜜，她把眼光从简陋的家，朴素的衣裳，自己光秃秃的脖子手指上移开，
每月精打细算的捂着手中不多的钱把日子过好，明依做得一手好菜，老公最爱喝她熬的汤，排骨炖莲藕，
鲫鱼萝卜丝，芋头娃娃菜……每次喝的肚儿圆圆才放下碗。看到老公简单满足的微笑，明依觉得，这就是幸福。
大学的谈资论辈终于令老公厌烦了。明依看出了他的心思，鼓励他去经商创业，
那一阵，家里家外的事情全靠明依一手操持，老公在外面联系洽谈，四处求人，有时候碰壁受气，回家难免冲着老婆发泄。
日子比刚结婚那阵更苦，心理压力也大，明依背地里也哭过，当面也和老公吵过，
但每当一早醒来看见老公的头颅孩子一般依恋在自己的肩头，心里便像温水里融化的蜜，暖暖的，甜甜的。
她比以往更加用心操持家务，把 500 元租来的小房间布置得整洁温馨；老公夜归的时候她总在灯下等着，
接下沉重的公文包，递上一杯热茶；临睡前两口子坐在床头聊聊烦心的事情，共同商量解决问题的办法。
怀上孩子的时候，老公的事业刚起步，天天周旋于客户和朋友间，请客吃饭，陪酒，陪玩，
每晚不到深更半夜回不了家。明依非常难过，面前的男人虽然还是熟悉的面孔，却好像完全换了一个灵魂。
他没时间对着大肚子的老婆嘘寒问暖，没精力回应老婆的温存关切，在生活的残酷考验下，
他还原了男人爱事业不爱美人的本质，简直就是一个工作狂。明依觉得自己的温柔克己完全白费了，
眼前的男人已经不是当初自己深爱的那一个，再勉强下去还有什么意义？
定居美国的大姐回来看她，明依哭着告诉她：老公给不了我想要的幸福，我想离婚。
大姐缄默，第二天给她带来一本美国专栏女作家的畅销小集子，里面有一句话让明依有所触动：有一种女人，
不管她嫁的是建筑工人还是国会议员，她都有能力让自己过得幸福。
没错，女人的幸福，为什么要靠男人给呢？每个女人，都应该有让自己，让家庭幸福的能力。
大着肚子的明依向父母求援，请妈妈过来帮忙买菜做饭，照顾这个自己无力兼顾的小家。
她强迫自己不去想烦心的事情，每天吃好睡好，安心养胎；她不再等老公夜归，
不再像以前那样每天缠着他问长问短，不再拿鸡毛蒜皮的小事去烦他；在他偶尔有空的时间里让他搀着自己散步，
彼此取笑着对方为孩子取名字。也怪了，一天天平静安稳地过去，原本觉得天昏暗地的生活，渐渐变得阳光灿烂起来。
女儿快 3 岁了，他们搬了新家。钱都花在房款上了，明依雇了个油漆匠把墙一刷，购置了简单的家具，
就这样凑合着先搬进去了。老公每天回家都能看到一点点新的变化：
客厅里别致的灯罩是用硬纸壳蒙上米色暗红碎花图案的棉布做的；自己到海南出差带回来的椰子，
吃剩的硬壳被巧妙改造成了造型可爱的小猪扑满；卷筒纸用完了，明依给简芯细致地裹上了一层米白色亚麻细布，
教女儿用蜡笔涂鸦，画出五彩的虹，绿的树，蓝色的河流，金色的太阳公公，这样一个 DIY 小笔筒摆在书桌上，
做爸爸的每次看到心里都暖洋洋的。一个原本平凡的空间在明依手里渐渐改头换面，一天比一天丰富，一天比一天有情趣。
汤妮的出现差点儿击碎了明依的幸福梦想。她是老公生意上的重要合伙人之一，年轻，家境富裕，有生意头脑和管
理能力，带着一种咄咄逼人的美和气势。汤妮明显地向老公老公表示好感，根本不在乎他的已婚身份，
男人到了这种地步，不免有些心猿意马，暧昧不明。很多人都来向明依告密，有的是打抱不平，有的纯粹为了看热闹。
明依却还是和以前一样，看自己的书，种自己的花花草草，照顾刚上小学的女儿。在老公回家的时候，
给他送上舒服的拖鞋；在他起床洗漱的时候，提前给他挤好牙膏。她对烹调的兴趣越发浓厚，
时不时来些新奇的花样。比如把香蕉切成小块，浇上酸奶，然后裹上全麦饼干屑；
去凤凰旅游的时候学会了用蒜叶和新鲜芫菜加干辣椒炝炒；跟婆婆学会了做四川泡菜。
种种小创意让在外面吃惯了大鱼大肉的老公回到家来就会忍不住多添一碗饭，赞一句，还是家里的菜好吃。
明依把周末的时间精心策划起来，老公有空的时候，带上孩子，开车到附近的农家乐，踏青，看红叶，
老公没空陪她，她就自己带着女儿去儿童乐园，或是看最新上映的动画大片。每次娘俩儿都开心的手牵手回家，
女儿欢声笑语，明依红光满面。
老公终日担心，如果明依提出那个难堪的问题，他不知道该如何回答。但明依开开心心地过自己的日子，
从来不多问一句。当然明依也有变化：她恢复了几分婚前活泼可爱的样子，穿衣打扮越发精致；
她参加了瑜伽课，学打网球；她组织姐妹旅行团去尼泊尔，回来容光焕发，给女儿带回一条手工绣花的小裙子，
送老公一个乌木镶银的烟灰缸；她甚至开始学习英文，居然可以磕磕巴巴地和美国网友聊天！
这个跟了自己 10 年的女人身上原来还有那么多自己不了解的特质和能量，这一切都让他感觉既陌生又熟悉，并深深为之吸引。
汤妮的事情居然就这么慢慢地淡了，没了，女友去看明依，崇拜无比地追问她处理方式。
明依笑说，见怪不怪，其怪自败。以前我老觉得嫁个好老公就能幸福，
现在看起来，女人的幸福不是靠男人给的。女人要有让自己幸福的能力。热爱生活，照顾好家庭，不冷落自己，
这才是女人真正的幸福。
这话有道理，一个家庭幸不幸福， 80% 以上取决于女主人。有能力让自己幸福，有能力给男人幸福，
才是聪明的好女人
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
7 big money mistakes to avoid
By Mary Hunt
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/7-big-money-mistakes-to-avoid-541533/print/
I’m going to guess you’ve made a financial mistake or two in your life. Who hasn’t? For some of us, it was more than an occasional late fee or random urge to overspend that brought us to our financial knees. But I’m not talking about the kind of blunders that got us into trouble—we could list those in our sleep. Instead, I want to focus on the mistakes people make while they’re working their way back to financial health. Whether you’re recovering from a season of unemployment or from a financial mess you created on your own, avoid these goofs and you’ll get where you want to go much faster.
1. Not Saving
7 Big Money Mistakes to Avoid
You’ve heard this plenty, and here it comes again: Jump to the front of the line— ahead of your creditors—when you divvy up your paycheck. Get over feeling guilty about keeping money for yourself. You need a fat emergency fund, and the only way to build it is to pay yourself first! Stuff happens, and if you’re not financially prepared for those emergencies, you’ll keep falling back into debt.
You’ll need enough in your fund to pay all your bills for at least six months. But don’t let that big number discourage you. Start by saving enough to live on for two weeks, then up it to one month, and so on until you reach goal.
Solution: Put your savings on autopilot—you won’t miss what you don’t see. Commit to saving 10 percent of every paycheck. If you can’t start there, start with 2 percent. Then in a few weeks, change it to 5 percent, then 7 and so forth until you reach at least 10 percent.
2. Paying for College
If you must make a choice between adequately funding your own retirement and paying for your kids’ college education, put retirement first. Contributing to college funds, going into debt by cosigning for student loans or taking out a home equity loan to cover tuition before you’ve taken care of your own future are huge blunders. The best gift you can give your kids is to make sure you won’t become a financial burden to them in your sunset years.
Solution: Kids have far more options for funding their college education than you have for your retirement. They’ve got scholarships, grants, financial aid, student loans, work-study programs and the not-to-be-forgotten method of working their way through college. Once your own future is secure and you’re out of debt, that’s when you’re in a position to help pay for education. Use the free Retirement Calculator at MoneyCentral.MSN.com/Retire/Planner.aspx to determine how much you need to be setting aside for retirement each month.
3. Too Much House
Add up your shelter costs (monthly mortgage payment plus taxes and insurance). Your total shouldn’t exceed 28 to 33 percent of your gross income—and that’s only if you don’t have a lot of other debt. Biting off more house than you can chew leaves you wide open to foreclosure and bankruptcy.
Solution: Don’t let a commissioned professional talk you into buying the most house you can qualify for. Do your own research and run your own numbers to determine how much house you can afford. You need a 20 percent down payment and a 30-year fixed-rate loan, with monthly payments that can easily fit within 28 to 33 percent of your current gross household income. If you’re over your head in a house you can’t afford, maybe it’s time to sell. If you’ve fallen behind or fear you may soon, but you owe more than the house is currently worth, call your lender immediately. You may be able to enter into a short sale (the lender agrees to settle your debt for the sale price that you can get for the house now, and forgives the balance you owe). Or speak with a HUD-approved housing counselor to find out about other options, such as loan modification (the lender agrees to adjust the terms of your loan so you can afford to keep living in your home).
4. Refinancing a Fixed-Rate Mortgage
With mortgage rates at a 50- year low, it’s tempting to refinance to get a lower monthly payment. But before you do that, ask yourself this: Can you take the difference between the payment you have now and the lower payment and use it to repay all your refinancing costs within 24 months?
Let’s do the math. The average closing cost is 2.5 to 5 percent on a $150,000 loan ($3,750 to $7,500), but the percentage normally goes down as the loan increases. Divide the amount you’ll save each month into the closing cost. If the result is more than 24, you’ll be making a big mistake by refinancing.
Even worse, refinancing with this lower monthly payment will “reset the clock,” putting you back on a 30- year payback schedule. Your goal should be to pay off the home so you own it free and clear before you retire If you’re 10 years from paying off your home and you refinance to get a lower monthly payment— but end up with a new 30-year term—you’ll be making those new “lower” payments for an additional 20 years! If the payment is, say, $2,000, you’ll end up paying an additional $480,000 just because you refinanced and reset the clock.
Solution: If you did the math earlier and it worked out in your favor, go ahead and refinance—but keep making the original, larger mortgage payments you’ve been making all along. Now, that lower payment will make an authentic, financially wise difference. You’ve managed to outsmart that reset clock and the extra interest that comes with it.
5. Paying Off the Mortgage Too Soon
Paying extra on your mortgage each month is laudable, but not if you time it badly. Your mortgage should be the last debt you pay off. Why? First, its interest rate is a lot lower than the interest you’re paying on your other debts (credit cards, student loans). Second, mortgage interest on your primary residence is tax-deductible. While you’re in debt having that deduction helps to ease the pain by lowering your tax bill.
Solution: Once you’ve built up a fat emergency fund and all of your high-interest, unsecured debts are paid in full—only then should you consider putting money toward paying off your mortgage.
6. Investing in the Wrong Thing
If there’s one thing we’ve learned over the past year, it’s that money invested in the stock market is at risk. You could lose it! Don’t jeopardize any of your hard-earned money while you’re carrying high-interest, unsecured debt. Instead, invest in your debt—it’s a much smarter move. Let me explain: If you have a $2,000 credit card balance at 14.5 percent interest, you’re paying $290 per year in interest, or $24.16 per month. Instead of taking a $2,000 gamble on the stock market, put it toward reducing your credit card debt Now each month, rather than paying that $24.16 interest to the credit card company, you get to keep it.
Solution: As long as you’re carrying unsecured debt, do everything you can to pay it down each month. You’ll get a return equal to the amount of interest you would have paid to the credit card company.
7. Debt Consolidation
Sounds great, doesn’t it? Get a new low-interest loan to pay off all your high-interest debts! But more often than not, that’s a big faux pas. Low-rate consolidation loans are typically tied to something of value like your home’s equity. Bad enough, but here’s the real problem: The financially immature person gets that equity loan and then keeps using those credit cards. In no time, the balances creep back to the limit. And that means double the trouble.
Solution: Forget about consolidating old debt into new debt. Instead, get serious about cutting your spending so you can pay off the debts you have as quickly as possible. If you have a good payment history, call the creditor and ask for a lower interest rate. You never know— you just might get it!
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/7-big-money-mistakes-to-avoid-541533/print/
I’m going to guess you’ve made a financial mistake or two in your life. Who hasn’t? For some of us, it was more than an occasional late fee or random urge to overspend that brought us to our financial knees. But I’m not talking about the kind of blunders that got us into trouble—we could list those in our sleep. Instead, I want to focus on the mistakes people make while they’re working their way back to financial health. Whether you’re recovering from a season of unemployment or from a financial mess you created on your own, avoid these goofs and you’ll get where you want to go much faster.
1. Not Saving
7 Big Money Mistakes to Avoid
You’ve heard this plenty, and here it comes again: Jump to the front of the line— ahead of your creditors—when you divvy up your paycheck. Get over feeling guilty about keeping money for yourself. You need a fat emergency fund, and the only way to build it is to pay yourself first! Stuff happens, and if you’re not financially prepared for those emergencies, you’ll keep falling back into debt.
You’ll need enough in your fund to pay all your bills for at least six months. But don’t let that big number discourage you. Start by saving enough to live on for two weeks, then up it to one month, and so on until you reach goal.
Solution: Put your savings on autopilot—you won’t miss what you don’t see. Commit to saving 10 percent of every paycheck. If you can’t start there, start with 2 percent. Then in a few weeks, change it to 5 percent, then 7 and so forth until you reach at least 10 percent.
2. Paying for College
If you must make a choice between adequately funding your own retirement and paying for your kids’ college education, put retirement first. Contributing to college funds, going into debt by cosigning for student loans or taking out a home equity loan to cover tuition before you’ve taken care of your own future are huge blunders. The best gift you can give your kids is to make sure you won’t become a financial burden to them in your sunset years.
Solution: Kids have far more options for funding their college education than you have for your retirement. They’ve got scholarships, grants, financial aid, student loans, work-study programs and the not-to-be-forgotten method of working their way through college. Once your own future is secure and you’re out of debt, that’s when you’re in a position to help pay for education. Use the free Retirement Calculator at MoneyCentral.MSN.com/Retire/Planner.aspx to determine how much you need to be setting aside for retirement each month.
3. Too Much House
Add up your shelter costs (monthly mortgage payment plus taxes and insurance). Your total shouldn’t exceed 28 to 33 percent of your gross income—and that’s only if you don’t have a lot of other debt. Biting off more house than you can chew leaves you wide open to foreclosure and bankruptcy.
Solution: Don’t let a commissioned professional talk you into buying the most house you can qualify for. Do your own research and run your own numbers to determine how much house you can afford. You need a 20 percent down payment and a 30-year fixed-rate loan, with monthly payments that can easily fit within 28 to 33 percent of your current gross household income. If you’re over your head in a house you can’t afford, maybe it’s time to sell. If you’ve fallen behind or fear you may soon, but you owe more than the house is currently worth, call your lender immediately. You may be able to enter into a short sale (the lender agrees to settle your debt for the sale price that you can get for the house now, and forgives the balance you owe). Or speak with a HUD-approved housing counselor to find out about other options, such as loan modification (the lender agrees to adjust the terms of your loan so you can afford to keep living in your home).
4. Refinancing a Fixed-Rate Mortgage
With mortgage rates at a 50- year low, it’s tempting to refinance to get a lower monthly payment. But before you do that, ask yourself this: Can you take the difference between the payment you have now and the lower payment and use it to repay all your refinancing costs within 24 months?
Let’s do the math. The average closing cost is 2.5 to 5 percent on a $150,000 loan ($3,750 to $7,500), but the percentage normally goes down as the loan increases. Divide the amount you’ll save each month into the closing cost. If the result is more than 24, you’ll be making a big mistake by refinancing.
Even worse, refinancing with this lower monthly payment will “reset the clock,” putting you back on a 30- year payback schedule. Your goal should be to pay off the home so you own it free and clear before you retire If you’re 10 years from paying off your home and you refinance to get a lower monthly payment— but end up with a new 30-year term—you’ll be making those new “lower” payments for an additional 20 years! If the payment is, say, $2,000, you’ll end up paying an additional $480,000 just because you refinanced and reset the clock.
Solution: If you did the math earlier and it worked out in your favor, go ahead and refinance—but keep making the original, larger mortgage payments you’ve been making all along. Now, that lower payment will make an authentic, financially wise difference. You’ve managed to outsmart that reset clock and the extra interest that comes with it.
5. Paying Off the Mortgage Too Soon
Paying extra on your mortgage each month is laudable, but not if you time it badly. Your mortgage should be the last debt you pay off. Why? First, its interest rate is a lot lower than the interest you’re paying on your other debts (credit cards, student loans). Second, mortgage interest on your primary residence is tax-deductible. While you’re in debt having that deduction helps to ease the pain by lowering your tax bill.
Solution: Once you’ve built up a fat emergency fund and all of your high-interest, unsecured debts are paid in full—only then should you consider putting money toward paying off your mortgage.
6. Investing in the Wrong Thing
If there’s one thing we’ve learned over the past year, it’s that money invested in the stock market is at risk. You could lose it! Don’t jeopardize any of your hard-earned money while you’re carrying high-interest, unsecured debt. Instead, invest in your debt—it’s a much smarter move. Let me explain: If you have a $2,000 credit card balance at 14.5 percent interest, you’re paying $290 per year in interest, or $24.16 per month. Instead of taking a $2,000 gamble on the stock market, put it toward reducing your credit card debt Now each month, rather than paying that $24.16 interest to the credit card company, you get to keep it.
Solution: As long as you’re carrying unsecured debt, do everything you can to pay it down each month. You’ll get a return equal to the amount of interest you would have paid to the credit card company.
7. Debt Consolidation
Sounds great, doesn’t it? Get a new low-interest loan to pay off all your high-interest debts! But more often than not, that’s a big faux pas. Low-rate consolidation loans are typically tied to something of value like your home’s equity. Bad enough, but here’s the real problem: The financially immature person gets that equity loan and then keeps using those credit cards. In no time, the balances creep back to the limit. And that means double the trouble.
Solution: Forget about consolidating old debt into new debt. Instead, get serious about cutting your spending so you can pay off the debts you have as quickly as possible. If you have a good payment history, call the creditor and ask for a lower interest rate. You never know— you just might get it!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
5 Things Never to Say to Your Insurers
5 Things Never to Say to Your Insurers
by Ismat Sarah Mangla
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
http://finance.yahoo.com/insurance/article/108074/5-things-never-to-say-to-your-insurers?mod=insurance
Some words are red flags to insurers and using them could mean that your claim might be delayed or even denied.
1. "I Think ..."
Never begin a statement regarding a claim with these words. If you aren't sure, don't guess. What you say could cause your claim to be delayed or denied, says attorney Vedica Puri. And if you're wrong -- say, you report driving at 30 miles per hour before an accident but police later prove you were going 50 -- it could hurt your credibility.
More from CNNMoney.com:
• The Most Expensive Colleges
• Health Test for Insurance Coverage
• What to Do With $50,000 Right Now
Particularly beware of speculating on blame or causation. For example, if you suggest that a water leak is due to a construction defect, you could give the insurer an out if that's a policy exclusion.
Stick to the facts. Should the insurance rep ask you a question you can't answer, simply say, "I don't know." If the person is taking a written or recorded statement, ask for a transcript to review for misstatements.
2. "I Got Whiplash"
Fraud costs auto insurers up to $6.8 billion a year, reports the Insurance Research Council. And suing for damages caused by whiplash is a fraudster favorite ("Oh, my neck!"). Merely mentioning the term is likely to get your claim flagged for further investigation, says Amy Danise of Insure.com.
Whiplash is a specific diagnosis. If a doctor says that you have it, then you should report it as such. Other wise, if you feel neck pain, just refer to it that way.
3. "It's an Experimental Treatment"
Truly experimental or investigational medical procedures are typically not eligible for health insurance coverage. So if a doctor tells you he wants to experiment with a treatment, don't represent it using those words. "In medical terms it may not actually be experimental or investigational," explains Danise. "If it's proven effective, your doctor deems it medically necessary, and it's not an exclusion, it should be covered." Verify with your doctor that it meets the above litmus tests before going to the insurer.
4. "My Basement Flooded"
With homeowners insurance, "flood" is a red flag. "The word refers to an act of weather or an overflow from a nearby body of water," says Danise. "And a standard homeowners policy doesn't cover it. You'd need flood insurance."
So don't use the f-word if your basement is knee-deep in water because of a burst pipe. Damages from such an incident should be covered by a homeowners policy. But calling it a "flood" could muddy the waters, so to speak.
5. "Just Send Me a Check"
When filing a home or auto claim, don't emphasize that you're just looking for the cash.
"If you were to say, 'I don't care about the roof leak, I just need the money,' that admission could slow things to a halt," says Puri. Technically, you're supposed to use the payout to make the repair for which you filed. While it's true that most insurance companies aren't going to check up on you, you'll certainly raise the fraud unit's suspicions if you imply that you won't. And then you might lose out on the money altogether.
by Ismat Sarah Mangla
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
http://finance.yahoo.com/insurance/article/108074/5-things-never-to-say-to-your-insurers?mod=insurance
Some words are red flags to insurers and using them could mean that your claim might be delayed or even denied.
1. "I Think ..."
Never begin a statement regarding a claim with these words. If you aren't sure, don't guess. What you say could cause your claim to be delayed or denied, says attorney Vedica Puri. And if you're wrong -- say, you report driving at 30 miles per hour before an accident but police later prove you were going 50 -- it could hurt your credibility.
More from CNNMoney.com:
• The Most Expensive Colleges
• Health Test for Insurance Coverage
• What to Do With $50,000 Right Now
Particularly beware of speculating on blame or causation. For example, if you suggest that a water leak is due to a construction defect, you could give the insurer an out if that's a policy exclusion.
Stick to the facts. Should the insurance rep ask you a question you can't answer, simply say, "I don't know." If the person is taking a written or recorded statement, ask for a transcript to review for misstatements.
2. "I Got Whiplash"
Fraud costs auto insurers up to $6.8 billion a year, reports the Insurance Research Council. And suing for damages caused by whiplash is a fraudster favorite ("Oh, my neck!"). Merely mentioning the term is likely to get your claim flagged for further investigation, says Amy Danise of Insure.com.
Whiplash is a specific diagnosis. If a doctor says that you have it, then you should report it as such. Other wise, if you feel neck pain, just refer to it that way.
3. "It's an Experimental Treatment"
Truly experimental or investigational medical procedures are typically not eligible for health insurance coverage. So if a doctor tells you he wants to experiment with a treatment, don't represent it using those words. "In medical terms it may not actually be experimental or investigational," explains Danise. "If it's proven effective, your doctor deems it medically necessary, and it's not an exclusion, it should be covered." Verify with your doctor that it meets the above litmus tests before going to the insurer.
4. "My Basement Flooded"
With homeowners insurance, "flood" is a red flag. "The word refers to an act of weather or an overflow from a nearby body of water," says Danise. "And a standard homeowners policy doesn't cover it. You'd need flood insurance."
So don't use the f-word if your basement is knee-deep in water because of a burst pipe. Damages from such an incident should be covered by a homeowners policy. But calling it a "flood" could muddy the waters, so to speak.
5. "Just Send Me a Check"
When filing a home or auto claim, don't emphasize that you're just looking for the cash.
"If you were to say, 'I don't care about the roof leak, I just need the money,' that admission could slow things to a halt," says Puri. Technically, you're supposed to use the payout to make the repair for which you filed. While it's true that most insurance companies aren't going to check up on you, you'll certainly raise the fraud unit's suspicions if you imply that you won't. And then you might lose out on the money altogether.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
5 Used-Car Red Flags
http://autos.yahoo.com/articles/autos_content_landing_pages/1153/5-used-car-red-flags/;_ylc=X3oDMTE2YWhpZHVsBF9TAzI3MTYxNDkEc2VjA2ZwLXRvZGF5BHNsawN1c2VkLXRyYXBz
If only cars could talk. It would make the buying experience a lot easier, wouldn't it? Because verbalized or not, every used car has a story to tell. And to avoid getting ripped off, it's up to you to listen. You need to know about the skeletons in that car's closet, the dark secrets of its past.
There are so many problems that can hide easily under the surface -- accident damage, a counterfeit title, failing mechanical parts. It's not as if you're marrying the car, but you are making quite a financial commitment. Wouldn't you rather find out about these red flags before saying "I do" and plunking down your hard-earned cash?
With this list of warning signs, you'll be able to make your next used car purchase confidently -- and if you do find "the one," we'll bet the relationship won't end in a messy divorce.
Red Flag #1: No Service Records
More from U.S. News & World Report
» Great Deals on Used Cars
» Best New Car Deals for October
One of the most important aspects of a used car is its maintenance history. You want to make sure you're buying a vehicle that has had routine oil changes and major mileage services. Always ask the seller, even if it's a car dealership, for all service records. If they can't provide those for you, you have no way of knowing if the car has been maintained properly. In addition to asking for records, look for a windshield sticker indicating when the car's next oil change is due. If there's no sticker or it shows an oil change is past due, ask why.
Red Flag #2: Vehicle and Accident History Issues
A vehicle history report is essential for any car purchase. You can ask the seller or dealership for the report or access it yourself online using the car's VIN (Vehicle Identification Number). AutoCheck charges $19.99 for a single report or $29.99 for unlimited reports for 60 days. The report shows accident/damage history as well as title problems, frame damage and an odometer rollback check -- any of which should be deal breakers.
Red Flag #3: Mechanical Problems
A quick look under the car can reveal fluid leaks, but unless you're an expert, you'll need to have someone else do a thorough inspection to make sure it's in good working condition. A PPI, or Pre-Purchase Inspection, is performed by a neutral third party (such as a certified mechanic or automotive technician) and costs about $100 to $200.
The inspection is a detailed assessment of the cosmetic and mechanical condition of the vehicle. It is an invaluable asset since it can alert you to problems, maintenance issues and even frame damage hiding under the surface. The mechanic should put the car on a lift to check undercarriage components. Make sure he or she also uses a paint meter gauge to catch any re-painted body panels -- which mean the car may have been in accidents that weren't reported to the insurance company (if they had been reported, they would show up on your AutoCheck vehicle history report). Choose the party who will perform the inspection, rather than going with someone recommended by the seller. Ask to have the results sent directly to you.
You may be tempted to skip a PPI, but it's almost always well worth it. You're making a large investment in a vehicle, and the price of the PPI is only a very small fraction of that. If any problems the PPI shows are deal breakers, you can walk away from the sale. If not, you can still use them to negotiate a better price.
Red Flag #4: A Problem Title
Your AutoCheck vehicle report will show any problem titles on the car's record at any point in its history -- everything from hail damage to fire damage. Most of these issues are red flags, but here's just a sampling of those to avoid at all costs: Flood titles, which means the vehicle has received extensive water damage; salvage titles, which mean an insurance company has at some point declared the car a total loss due to sustained damage; and junk titles, which mean the vehicle indicate that a vehicle is not safe enough for use and the car cannot be titled again in that state.
Red Flag #5: A Fraudulent Title
A problem-free title doesn't mean it's valid. Criminals can create counterfeit or fraudulent titles and use them to legally register and then sell stolen cars. If you buy a car without a valid title, it's the worst-case scenario -- you don't legally own the car you just bought.
The first step to verify the title is to check with the DMV. Usually, you'll just need the car's VIN number and may be charged a small fee (often these transactions require you to go to the DMV's office). You need to make sure the VIN on the car matches the VIN on the title and the seller's name matches the one on the title. This record check is also valuable because it will show any outstanding liens on the title, which means that the owner is still making payments on the car and doesn't own it outright. This could complicate the sale later, especially if you're buying from a private seller.
However, even if the title appears to belong to the seller, it could still be fraudulent. There are a few signs that may signify foul play. Play close attention if the vehicle was recently brought to your state and titled or if the VIN number on the car is obscured or shows signs of tampering. The title should look official, meaning it will be printed on special paper with watermarks (visible when held up to the light). All text, graphics and borders should be sharp, not blurred. If you can, compare the title with an original (perhaps from a friend's car in the same state) and make sure the two look the same.
The Bottom Line
Checking for all these red flags may seem excessive, but they can save you time and headaches down the line. In the end, the PPI, AutoCheck vehicle history report, DMV records and seller should be consistent. If any of the information seems fishy, consider walking away from the sale. If any of the above warning signs do surface, you may not even want to give the car a second thought. It doesn't hurt to walk away, but it can sure hurt a lot to buy a problem vehicle. Plus, with the internet, you can find virtually any car, anywhere. And as they say, there are plenty of other fish in the sea.
If only cars could talk. It would make the buying experience a lot easier, wouldn't it? Because verbalized or not, every used car has a story to tell. And to avoid getting ripped off, it's up to you to listen. You need to know about the skeletons in that car's closet, the dark secrets of its past.
There are so many problems that can hide easily under the surface -- accident damage, a counterfeit title, failing mechanical parts. It's not as if you're marrying the car, but you are making quite a financial commitment. Wouldn't you rather find out about these red flags before saying "I do" and plunking down your hard-earned cash?
With this list of warning signs, you'll be able to make your next used car purchase confidently -- and if you do find "the one," we'll bet the relationship won't end in a messy divorce.
Red Flag #1: No Service Records
More from U.S. News & World Report
» Great Deals on Used Cars
» Best New Car Deals for October
One of the most important aspects of a used car is its maintenance history. You want to make sure you're buying a vehicle that has had routine oil changes and major mileage services. Always ask the seller, even if it's a car dealership, for all service records. If they can't provide those for you, you have no way of knowing if the car has been maintained properly. In addition to asking for records, look for a windshield sticker indicating when the car's next oil change is due. If there's no sticker or it shows an oil change is past due, ask why.
Red Flag #2: Vehicle and Accident History Issues
A vehicle history report is essential for any car purchase. You can ask the seller or dealership for the report or access it yourself online using the car's VIN (Vehicle Identification Number). AutoCheck charges $19.99 for a single report or $29.99 for unlimited reports for 60 days. The report shows accident/damage history as well as title problems, frame damage and an odometer rollback check -- any of which should be deal breakers.
Red Flag #3: Mechanical Problems
A quick look under the car can reveal fluid leaks, but unless you're an expert, you'll need to have someone else do a thorough inspection to make sure it's in good working condition. A PPI, or Pre-Purchase Inspection, is performed by a neutral third party (such as a certified mechanic or automotive technician) and costs about $100 to $200.
The inspection is a detailed assessment of the cosmetic and mechanical condition of the vehicle. It is an invaluable asset since it can alert you to problems, maintenance issues and even frame damage hiding under the surface. The mechanic should put the car on a lift to check undercarriage components. Make sure he or she also uses a paint meter gauge to catch any re-painted body panels -- which mean the car may have been in accidents that weren't reported to the insurance company (if they had been reported, they would show up on your AutoCheck vehicle history report). Choose the party who will perform the inspection, rather than going with someone recommended by the seller. Ask to have the results sent directly to you.
You may be tempted to skip a PPI, but it's almost always well worth it. You're making a large investment in a vehicle, and the price of the PPI is only a very small fraction of that. If any problems the PPI shows are deal breakers, you can walk away from the sale. If not, you can still use them to negotiate a better price.
Red Flag #4: A Problem Title
Your AutoCheck vehicle report will show any problem titles on the car's record at any point in its history -- everything from hail damage to fire damage. Most of these issues are red flags, but here's just a sampling of those to avoid at all costs: Flood titles, which means the vehicle has received extensive water damage; salvage titles, which mean an insurance company has at some point declared the car a total loss due to sustained damage; and junk titles, which mean the vehicle indicate that a vehicle is not safe enough for use and the car cannot be titled again in that state.
Red Flag #5: A Fraudulent Title
A problem-free title doesn't mean it's valid. Criminals can create counterfeit or fraudulent titles and use them to legally register and then sell stolen cars. If you buy a car without a valid title, it's the worst-case scenario -- you don't legally own the car you just bought.
The first step to verify the title is to check with the DMV. Usually, you'll just need the car's VIN number and may be charged a small fee (often these transactions require you to go to the DMV's office). You need to make sure the VIN on the car matches the VIN on the title and the seller's name matches the one on the title. This record check is also valuable because it will show any outstanding liens on the title, which means that the owner is still making payments on the car and doesn't own it outright. This could complicate the sale later, especially if you're buying from a private seller.
However, even if the title appears to belong to the seller, it could still be fraudulent. There are a few signs that may signify foul play. Play close attention if the vehicle was recently brought to your state and titled or if the VIN number on the car is obscured or shows signs of tampering. The title should look official, meaning it will be printed on special paper with watermarks (visible when held up to the light). All text, graphics and borders should be sharp, not blurred. If you can, compare the title with an original (perhaps from a friend's car in the same state) and make sure the two look the same.
The Bottom Line
Checking for all these red flags may seem excessive, but they can save you time and headaches down the line. In the end, the PPI, AutoCheck vehicle history report, DMV records and seller should be consistent. If any of the information seems fishy, consider walking away from the sale. If any of the above warning signs do surface, you may not even want to give the car a second thought. It doesn't hurt to walk away, but it can sure hurt a lot to buy a problem vehicle. Plus, with the internet, you can find virtually any car, anywhere. And as they say, there are plenty of other fish in the sea.
为什么华人移民的孩子都非要学钢琴？
为什么华人移民的孩子都非要学钢琴？
http://bbs.creaders.net/tea/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=416506
送交者: 小野君 2009年10月26日23:57:51 于 [茗香茶语] 发送悄悄话
因为本人以前搞过作曲和音乐制作，所以身边的朋友、同事不约而同认定我是个音乐“行家”，已经不止一次有朋友请我帮孩子挑钢琴。琴行的Sales都快认识我了，上次带朋友去挑钢琴的时候，琴行的人就向我打听我在哪里教琴，弄得我哭笑不得。说实话，挑钢琴我绝对不是内行，虽然我会弹但是钢琴不是我的专业。即使我自己的作品中，除了小样是自己弹以外，到了真正制作的时候也是请专门的乐手来弹。
一个是令我自己不解的问题就是：为什么所有中国人的孩子都学钢琴？我其实早就发现这个奇怪的问题了。尤其是等我自己有了孩子，我的孩子周围有一批华人同龄小朋友以后更发现，好像所有中国人的孩子都在学钢琴，而且都冲着考级去的。仿佛到了年龄学琴、到了一定程度考级已经是一个固定模式了，就跟我们每天吃饭、睡觉一样自然而然。而且不仅是学钢琴在华人中的普及度高，入门的年龄也是一再提前，不夸张地说，现在孩子4岁开始学琴就已经算是晚的了。
首先声明我自己没有级。我学琴的时候好没有考级这个概念，而且就算有，我肯定也考不过。因为钢琴于我就是一个爱好，谁会把自己的爱好评级呢？我家门口就有一个洋人开的琴行，琴行里面那个卖钢琴的Sales除了不会说中文以外，简直就是一个中国通了。因为在那里挑琴、买琴、学琴的几乎都是中国人。做Sales，自然就要投其所好，那个Sales十分清楚中国人买琴为什么，所以每当有华人面孔的客户来挑琴的时候，他就会反复推荐说哪个型号是考级专用云云。我猜测如果中国人什么时候不学弹钢琴了，这个店一定会关门大吉。
但是为什么中国孩子都在学钢琴呢。谁都没有一个准确答案。我唯一知道的是这些学琴的孩子中最终能够喜欢音乐的比例很低。很大一个比例都是被父母逼着练琴的。只要没有逼着，一辈子都不愿意摸那个琴键，更谈不上对音乐喜好和追求了。在很多孩子看起来，钢琴不是作为乐器被发明的，而是作为刑具被使用的。如果坐在琴凳上唯一的想法就是赶快混完时间交差，那就根本谈上不去享受音乐带来的快乐了。如果学习音乐不是因为音乐会带来快乐，那么何苦浪费大好时光和金钱呢？
我也有个女儿，今年已经四岁了。作为父亲，我还没有任何计划让她参加学习班学琴。根据我的观察，她的乐感发育还挺落后的。她现在基本的音准在刚刚有些掌握，节奏感还基本没有。这个阶段去学琴就是浪费时间，而且很大可能会产生对音乐的厌恶情绪，弄不好会让她终生失去和音乐交融的机会。至于何时给她进行音乐启蒙，我看还需时日。我确实十分希望她能从我这里继承一些音乐细胞，和我有一些共同的兴趣爱好，但是我不愿意把自己的意愿强加在孩子身上，让他幼小的心灵承受巨大压力。我们带着孩子从万里之遥的国家来到这里，就是为了给孩子们一个轻松快乐的成长环境，那么我们到了这里，为什么还要把大人的压力加在孩子身上呢？看着很多朋友家的小孩子天天抹着眼泪去练琴，我的心底，留下了一声叹息……
http://bbs.creaders.net/tea/bbsviewer.php?trd_id=416506
送交者: 小野君 2009年10月26日23:57:51 于 [茗香茶语] 发送悄悄话
因为本人以前搞过作曲和音乐制作，所以身边的朋友、同事不约而同认定我是个音乐“行家”，已经不止一次有朋友请我帮孩子挑钢琴。琴行的Sales都快认识我了，上次带朋友去挑钢琴的时候，琴行的人就向我打听我在哪里教琴，弄得我哭笑不得。说实话，挑钢琴我绝对不是内行，虽然我会弹但是钢琴不是我的专业。即使我自己的作品中，除了小样是自己弹以外，到了真正制作的时候也是请专门的乐手来弹。
一个是令我自己不解的问题就是：为什么所有中国人的孩子都学钢琴？我其实早就发现这个奇怪的问题了。尤其是等我自己有了孩子，我的孩子周围有一批华人同龄小朋友以后更发现，好像所有中国人的孩子都在学钢琴，而且都冲着考级去的。仿佛到了年龄学琴、到了一定程度考级已经是一个固定模式了，就跟我们每天吃饭、睡觉一样自然而然。而且不仅是学钢琴在华人中的普及度高，入门的年龄也是一再提前，不夸张地说，现在孩子4岁开始学琴就已经算是晚的了。
首先声明我自己没有级。我学琴的时候好没有考级这个概念，而且就算有，我肯定也考不过。因为钢琴于我就是一个爱好，谁会把自己的爱好评级呢？我家门口就有一个洋人开的琴行，琴行里面那个卖钢琴的Sales除了不会说中文以外，简直就是一个中国通了。因为在那里挑琴、买琴、学琴的几乎都是中国人。做Sales，自然就要投其所好，那个Sales十分清楚中国人买琴为什么，所以每当有华人面孔的客户来挑琴的时候，他就会反复推荐说哪个型号是考级专用云云。我猜测如果中国人什么时候不学弹钢琴了，这个店一定会关门大吉。
但是为什么中国孩子都在学钢琴呢。谁都没有一个准确答案。我唯一知道的是这些学琴的孩子中最终能够喜欢音乐的比例很低。很大一个比例都是被父母逼着练琴的。只要没有逼着，一辈子都不愿意摸那个琴键，更谈不上对音乐喜好和追求了。在很多孩子看起来，钢琴不是作为乐器被发明的，而是作为刑具被使用的。如果坐在琴凳上唯一的想法就是赶快混完时间交差，那就根本谈上不去享受音乐带来的快乐了。如果学习音乐不是因为音乐会带来快乐，那么何苦浪费大好时光和金钱呢？
我也有个女儿，今年已经四岁了。作为父亲，我还没有任何计划让她参加学习班学琴。根据我的观察，她的乐感发育还挺落后的。她现在基本的音准在刚刚有些掌握，节奏感还基本没有。这个阶段去学琴就是浪费时间，而且很大可能会产生对音乐的厌恶情绪，弄不好会让她终生失去和音乐交融的机会。至于何时给她进行音乐启蒙，我看还需时日。我确实十分希望她能从我这里继承一些音乐细胞，和我有一些共同的兴趣爱好，但是我不愿意把自己的意愿强加在孩子身上，让他幼小的心灵承受巨大压力。我们带着孩子从万里之遥的国家来到这里，就是为了给孩子们一个轻松快乐的成长环境，那么我们到了这里，为什么还要把大人的压力加在孩子身上呢？看着很多朋友家的小孩子天天抹着眼泪去练琴，我的心底，留下了一声叹息……
Sunday, October 18, 2009
revolutionary road (film)
Frank and April, a married couple in the 1950s, have always seen themselves as special, different, ready and willing to live their lives based on higher ideals. So, as soon as they move into their new house on Revolutionary Road, they proudly declare their independence from the suburban inertia that surrounds them and determine never to be trapped by the social confines of their era. Yet for all their charm, beauty and irreverence, the Wheelers find themselves becoming exactly what they didn't expect: a good man with a routine job whose nerve has gone missing; a less-than-happy homemaker starving for fulfillment and passion; an American family with lost dreams, like any other. Driven to change their fates, April hatches an audacious plan to start all over again, to leave the comforts of Connecticut behind for the great unknown of Paris. But when the plan is put in motion, each spouse is pushed to extremes--one to escape whatever the cost, the other to save all that they have, no matter the compromises.
Friday, October 16, 2009
zt: 给女儿的一封信
http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_475b3d560100fc47.html?tj=1
给女儿的一封信(2009-10-09 13:57:26)标签：女儿 教育 大学 分类：其它文章
Dear Daughter:
亲爱的女儿：
As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.
当我们开车驶出哥伦比亚大学的时候，我想写一封信给你，告诉你盘旋在我脑中的想法。
First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.
首先，我想告诉你我们为你感到特别骄傲。进入哥伦比亚大学证明你是一个全面发展的优秀学生，你的学业、艺术和社交技能最近都有卓越的表现，无论是你高中微积分第一名，时尚的设计，绘制的球鞋，还是在“模拟联合国”的演说，你毫无疑问已经是一个多才多艺的女孩。你的父母为你感到骄傲，你也应该像我们一样为自己感到自豪。
I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that “father-daughter connection” which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.
我会永远记得第一次将你抱在臂弯的那一刻，一种新鲜激动的感觉瞬间触动了我的心，那是一种永远让我陶醉的感觉，就是那种将我们的一生都联结在一起的“父女情结”。我也常常想起我唱着催眠曲轻摇你入睡，当我把你放下的时候，常常觉得既解脱又惋惜，一方面我想，她终于睡着了！另一方面，我又多么希望自己可以多抱你一会儿。我还记得带你到运动场，看着你玩得那么开心，你是那样可爱，所有人都非常爱你。
You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.
你不但长得可爱，而且是个特别乖巧的孩子。你从不吵闹、为人着想，既听话又有礼貌。当你三岁我们建房子的时候，每个周末十多个小时你都静静地跟着我们去运建筑材料，三餐在车上吃着汉堡，唱着儿歌，唱累了就睡觉，一点都不娇气不抱怨。你去上周日的中文学习班时，尽管一点也不觉得有趣，却依然很努力。我们做父母的能有像你这样的女儿真的感到非常幸运。
You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.
你也是个很好的姐姐。虽然你们姐妹以前也会打架，但是长大后，你们真的成为了好朋友。妹妹很爱你，很喜欢逗你笑，她把你当成她的榜样看待。我们开车离开哥大后，她非常想你，我知道你也很想她。世界上最宝贵的就是家人。和父母一样，妹妹就是你最可以信任的人。随着年龄的增长，你们姐妹之间的情谊不变，你们互相照应，彼此关心，这就是我最希望见到的事情了。在你的大学四年，有空时你一定要常常跟妹妹视频聊聊天，写写电子邮件。
College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question “what good is this course”. I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you : “education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten”. What I mean by that is the materials taught isn’t as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about – this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn’t critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.
大学将是你人生最重要的时光，在大学里你会发现学习的真谛。你以前经常会问到 “这个课程有什么用”，这是个好问题，但是我希望你理解：“教育的真谛就是当你忘记一切所学到的东西之后所剩下的东西。”我的意思是，最重要的不是你学到的具体的知识，而是你学习新事物和解决新问题的能力。这才是大学学习的真正意义——这将是你从被动学习转向自主学习的阶段，之后你会变成一个很好的自学者。所以，即便你所学的不是生活里所急需的，也要认真看待大学里的每一门功课，就算学习的技能你会忘记，学习的能力是你将受用终身的。
Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don’t believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely “black and white”, and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called “critical thinking”, and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said “I don’t agree with you, but I’ll support you.” After the years, I have learned this isn’t just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.
不要被教条所束缚，任何问题都没有一个唯一的简单的答案。还记得当我帮助你高中的辩论课程时，我总是让你站在你不认可的那一方来辩论吗？我这么做的理由就是希望你能够理解：看待一个问题不应该非黑即白，而是有很多方法和角度。当你意识到这点的时候，你就会成为一个很好的解决问题者。这就是“批判的思维”——你的一生都会需要的最重要的思考方式，这也意味着你还需要包容和支持不同于你的其他观点。我永远记得我去找我的博士导师提出了一个新论题，他告诉我：“我不同意你，但我支持你。”多年后，我认识到这不仅仅是包容，而是一种批判式思考，更是令人折服的领导风格，现在这也变成了我的一部分。我希望这也能成为你的一部分。
Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don’t be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement , he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don’t worry too much about what job you will have, and don’t be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks “it’s not useful.” ：） Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.
在大学里你要追随自己的激情和兴趣，选你感兴趣的课程，不要困扰于别人怎么说或怎么想。史蒂夫•乔布斯曾经说过，在大学里你的热情会创造出很多点，在你随后的生命中你会把这些点串联起来。在他著名的斯坦福毕业典礼演讲中，他举了一个很好的例子：他在大学里修了看似毫无用处的书法，而十年后，这成了苹果Macintosh里漂亮字库的基础，而因为Macintosh有这么好的字库，才带来了桌面出版和今天的办公软件（例如微软Office）。他对书法的探索就是一个点，而苹果Macintosh把多个点联结成了一条线。所以不要太担心将来你要做什么样的工作，也不要太急功近利。假如你喜欢日语或韩语，就去学吧，尽管你的爸爸曾说过那没什么用：）尽兴地选择你的点吧，要有信念有一天机缘来临时，你会找到自己的人生使命，画出一条美丽的曲线。
Do your best in classes, but don’t let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don’t graduate with honors. So please don’t give yourself pressure。During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don’t be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.
在功课上要尽力，但不要给自己太多压力。你妈妈和我在成绩上对你没什么要求，只要你能顺利毕业并在这四年里学到了些东西，我们就会很高兴了。即便你毕业时没有获得优异的成绩，你的哥伦比亚学位也将带你走得很远。所以别给自己压力。在你高中生活的最后几个月，因为压力比较小，大学申请也结束了，你过得很开心，但是在最近的几个星期，你好像开始紧张起来。（你注意到你紧张时会咬指甲吗？）千万别担心，最重要的是你有在学习，你需要的唯一衡量是你的努力程度。成绩只不过是虚荣的人用以吹嘘和慵懒的人所恐惧的无聊数字而已，而你既不虚荣也不慵懒。
Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them – pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don’t worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person – anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don’t stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success – that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters – to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.
最重要的是在大学里你要交一些朋友，快乐生活。大学的朋友往往是生命中最好的朋友，因为在大学里你和朋友能够近距离交往。另外，在一块儿成长，一起独立，很自然地你们就会紧紧地系在一起，成为密友。你应该挑选一些真诚诚恳的朋友，跟他们亲近，别在乎他们的爱好、成绩、外表甚至性格。你在高中的最后两年已经交到了一些真正的朋友，所以尽可以相信自己的直觉，再交一些新朋友吧。你是一个真诚的人，任何人都会喜欢跟你做朋友的，所以要自信、外向、主动一点，如果你喜欢某人，就告诉她，就算她拒绝了，你也没有损失什么。以最大的善意去对人，不要有成见，要宽容。人无完人，只要他们很真诚，就信任他们，对他们友善。他们将给你相同的回报，这是我成功的秘密——我以诚待人，信任他人（除非他们做了失信于我的事）。有人告诉这样有时我会被占便宜，他们是对的，但是我可以告诉你：以诚待人让我得到的远远超过我失去的。在我做管理的18年里，我学到一件很重要的事——要想得到他人的信任和尊重，只有先去信任和尊重他人。无论是管理、工作、交友，这点都值得你参考。
Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.
要和你高中时代的朋友保持联系，但是不要用他们来取代大学的友谊，也不要把全部的时间都花在老朋友身上，因为那样你就会失去交新朋友的机会了。
Start planning for your summers early – what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.
你还要早点开始规划你的暑假——你想做什么？你想呆在哪儿？你想学点什么？你在大学里学习是否会让你有新的打算？我觉得你学习艺术设计的计划很不错，你应该想好你该去哪儿学习相应的课程。我们当然希望你回到北京，但是最终的决定是你的。
Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver’s seat – this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life – that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you’ll love it!
不管是暑假计划，功课规划，抑或是选专业，管理时间，你都应该负责你的人生。过去不管是申请学校、设计课外活动或者选择最初的课程，我都从旁帮助了你不少。以后，我仍然会一直站你身旁，但是现在是你自己掌舵的时候了。我常常记起我生命中那些令人振奋的时刻——在幼儿园决定跳级，决定转到计算机科学专业，决定离开学术界选择Apple，决定回中国，决定选择Google，乃至最近选择创办我的新公司。有能力进行选择意味着你会过上自己想要的生活。生命太短暂了，你不能过别人想要你过的生活。掌控自己的生命是很棒的感觉，试试吧，你会爱上它的！
I told your mom I’m writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: “just ask her to take care of herself.” Simple but deeply caring – that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself – that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don’t feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.
我告诉你妈妈我在写这封信，问她有什么想对你说的，她想了想，说“让她好好照顾自己”，很简单却饱含着真切的关心——这一向是你深爱的妈妈的特点。这短短的一句话，是她想提醒你很多事情，比如要记得自己按时吃药，好好睡觉，保持健康的饮食，适量运动，不舒服的时候要去看医生等等。中国有句古语，说“身体发肤，受之父母，不敢毁伤，孝之始也”。这句话的意思用比较新的方法诠释就是说：父母最爱的就是你，所以照顾好自己就是孝顺最好的方法。当你成为母亲的那天，你就会理解这些。在那天之前，听妈妈的，你一定要好好照顾自己。
College is the four years where you have:
• the greatest amount of free time
• the first chance to be independent
• the most flexibility to change
• the lowest risk for making mistakes
So please treasure your college years – make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.
大学是你自由时间最多的四年。
大学是你第一次学会独立的四年。
大学是可塑性最强的四年。
大学是犯错代价最低的四年。
所以，珍惜你的大学时光吧，好好利用你的空闲时间，成为掌握自己命运的独立思考者，发展自己的多元化才能，大胆地去尝试，通过不断的成功和挑战来学习和成长，成为融汇中西的人才。
When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said “bonne chance”, which means “good luck” and “good courage”. Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.
当我在2005年面对人生最大的挑战时，你给了我大大的拥抱，还跟我说了一句法语“bonne chance”。这句话代表“祝你勇敢，祝你好运！”现在，我也想跟你说同样的话，bonne chance，我的天使和公主，希望哥伦比亚成为你一生中最快乐的四年，希望你成为你梦想成为的人！
Love,
Dad (& Mom)
爱你的，
爸爸（和妈妈）
给女儿的一封信(2009-10-09 13:57:26)标签：女儿 教育 大学 分类：其它文章
Dear Daughter:
亲爱的女儿：
As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.
当我们开车驶出哥伦比亚大学的时候，我想写一封信给你，告诉你盘旋在我脑中的想法。
First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.
首先，我想告诉你我们为你感到特别骄傲。进入哥伦比亚大学证明你是一个全面发展的优秀学生，你的学业、艺术和社交技能最近都有卓越的表现，无论是你高中微积分第一名，时尚的设计，绘制的球鞋，还是在“模拟联合国”的演说，你毫无疑问已经是一个多才多艺的女孩。你的父母为你感到骄傲，你也应该像我们一样为自己感到自豪。
I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that “father-daughter connection” which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.
我会永远记得第一次将你抱在臂弯的那一刻，一种新鲜激动的感觉瞬间触动了我的心，那是一种永远让我陶醉的感觉，就是那种将我们的一生都联结在一起的“父女情结”。我也常常想起我唱着催眠曲轻摇你入睡，当我把你放下的时候，常常觉得既解脱又惋惜，一方面我想，她终于睡着了！另一方面，我又多么希望自己可以多抱你一会儿。我还记得带你到运动场，看着你玩得那么开心，你是那样可爱，所有人都非常爱你。
You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.
你不但长得可爱，而且是个特别乖巧的孩子。你从不吵闹、为人着想，既听话又有礼貌。当你三岁我们建房子的时候，每个周末十多个小时你都静静地跟着我们去运建筑材料，三餐在车上吃着汉堡，唱着儿歌，唱累了就睡觉，一点都不娇气不抱怨。你去上周日的中文学习班时，尽管一点也不觉得有趣，却依然很努力。我们做父母的能有像你这样的女儿真的感到非常幸运。
You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.
你也是个很好的姐姐。虽然你们姐妹以前也会打架，但是长大后，你们真的成为了好朋友。妹妹很爱你，很喜欢逗你笑，她把你当成她的榜样看待。我们开车离开哥大后，她非常想你，我知道你也很想她。世界上最宝贵的就是家人。和父母一样，妹妹就是你最可以信任的人。随着年龄的增长，你们姐妹之间的情谊不变，你们互相照应，彼此关心，这就是我最希望见到的事情了。在你的大学四年，有空时你一定要常常跟妹妹视频聊聊天，写写电子邮件。
College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question “what good is this course”. I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you : “education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten”. What I mean by that is the materials taught isn’t as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about – this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn’t critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.
大学将是你人生最重要的时光，在大学里你会发现学习的真谛。你以前经常会问到 “这个课程有什么用”，这是个好问题，但是我希望你理解：“教育的真谛就是当你忘记一切所学到的东西之后所剩下的东西。”我的意思是，最重要的不是你学到的具体的知识，而是你学习新事物和解决新问题的能力。这才是大学学习的真正意义——这将是你从被动学习转向自主学习的阶段，之后你会变成一个很好的自学者。所以，即便你所学的不是生活里所急需的，也要认真看待大学里的每一门功课，就算学习的技能你会忘记，学习的能力是你将受用终身的。
Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don’t believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely “black and white”, and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called “critical thinking”, and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said “I don’t agree with you, but I’ll support you.” After the years, I have learned this isn’t just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.
不要被教条所束缚，任何问题都没有一个唯一的简单的答案。还记得当我帮助你高中的辩论课程时，我总是让你站在你不认可的那一方来辩论吗？我这么做的理由就是希望你能够理解：看待一个问题不应该非黑即白，而是有很多方法和角度。当你意识到这点的时候，你就会成为一个很好的解决问题者。这就是“批判的思维”——你的一生都会需要的最重要的思考方式，这也意味着你还需要包容和支持不同于你的其他观点。我永远记得我去找我的博士导师提出了一个新论题，他告诉我：“我不同意你，但我支持你。”多年后，我认识到这不仅仅是包容，而是一种批判式思考，更是令人折服的领导风格，现在这也变成了我的一部分。我希望这也能成为你的一部分。
Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don’t be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement , he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don’t worry too much about what job you will have, and don’t be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks “it’s not useful.” ：） Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.
在大学里你要追随自己的激情和兴趣，选你感兴趣的课程，不要困扰于别人怎么说或怎么想。史蒂夫•乔布斯曾经说过，在大学里你的热情会创造出很多点，在你随后的生命中你会把这些点串联起来。在他著名的斯坦福毕业典礼演讲中，他举了一个很好的例子：他在大学里修了看似毫无用处的书法，而十年后，这成了苹果Macintosh里漂亮字库的基础，而因为Macintosh有这么好的字库，才带来了桌面出版和今天的办公软件（例如微软Office）。他对书法的探索就是一个点，而苹果Macintosh把多个点联结成了一条线。所以不要太担心将来你要做什么样的工作，也不要太急功近利。假如你喜欢日语或韩语，就去学吧，尽管你的爸爸曾说过那没什么用：）尽兴地选择你的点吧，要有信念有一天机缘来临时，你会找到自己的人生使命，画出一条美丽的曲线。
Do your best in classes, but don’t let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don’t graduate with honors. So please don’t give yourself pressure。During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don’t be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.
在功课上要尽力，但不要给自己太多压力。你妈妈和我在成绩上对你没什么要求，只要你能顺利毕业并在这四年里学到了些东西，我们就会很高兴了。即便你毕业时没有获得优异的成绩，你的哥伦比亚学位也将带你走得很远。所以别给自己压力。在你高中生活的最后几个月，因为压力比较小，大学申请也结束了，你过得很开心，但是在最近的几个星期，你好像开始紧张起来。（你注意到你紧张时会咬指甲吗？）千万别担心，最重要的是你有在学习，你需要的唯一衡量是你的努力程度。成绩只不过是虚荣的人用以吹嘘和慵懒的人所恐惧的无聊数字而已，而你既不虚荣也不慵懒。
Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them – pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don’t worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person – anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don’t stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success – that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters – to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.
最重要的是在大学里你要交一些朋友，快乐生活。大学的朋友往往是生命中最好的朋友，因为在大学里你和朋友能够近距离交往。另外，在一块儿成长，一起独立，很自然地你们就会紧紧地系在一起，成为密友。你应该挑选一些真诚诚恳的朋友，跟他们亲近，别在乎他们的爱好、成绩、外表甚至性格。你在高中的最后两年已经交到了一些真正的朋友，所以尽可以相信自己的直觉，再交一些新朋友吧。你是一个真诚的人，任何人都会喜欢跟你做朋友的，所以要自信、外向、主动一点，如果你喜欢某人，就告诉她，就算她拒绝了，你也没有损失什么。以最大的善意去对人，不要有成见，要宽容。人无完人，只要他们很真诚，就信任他们，对他们友善。他们将给你相同的回报，这是我成功的秘密——我以诚待人，信任他人（除非他们做了失信于我的事）。有人告诉这样有时我会被占便宜，他们是对的，但是我可以告诉你：以诚待人让我得到的远远超过我失去的。在我做管理的18年里，我学到一件很重要的事——要想得到他人的信任和尊重，只有先去信任和尊重他人。无论是管理、工作、交友，这点都值得你参考。
Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.
要和你高中时代的朋友保持联系，但是不要用他们来取代大学的友谊，也不要把全部的时间都花在老朋友身上，因为那样你就会失去交新朋友的机会了。
Start planning for your summers early – what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.
你还要早点开始规划你的暑假——你想做什么？你想呆在哪儿？你想学点什么？你在大学里学习是否会让你有新的打算？我觉得你学习艺术设计的计划很不错，你应该想好你该去哪儿学习相应的课程。我们当然希望你回到北京，但是最终的决定是你的。
Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver’s seat – this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life – that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you’ll love it!
不管是暑假计划，功课规划，抑或是选专业，管理时间，你都应该负责你的人生。过去不管是申请学校、设计课外活动或者选择最初的课程，我都从旁帮助了你不少。以后，我仍然会一直站你身旁，但是现在是你自己掌舵的时候了。我常常记起我生命中那些令人振奋的时刻——在幼儿园决定跳级，决定转到计算机科学专业，决定离开学术界选择Apple，决定回中国，决定选择Google，乃至最近选择创办我的新公司。有能力进行选择意味着你会过上自己想要的生活。生命太短暂了，你不能过别人想要你过的生活。掌控自己的生命是很棒的感觉，试试吧，你会爱上它的！
I told your mom I’m writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: “just ask her to take care of herself.” Simple but deeply caring – that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself – that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don’t feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.
我告诉你妈妈我在写这封信，问她有什么想对你说的，她想了想，说“让她好好照顾自己”，很简单却饱含着真切的关心——这一向是你深爱的妈妈的特点。这短短的一句话，是她想提醒你很多事情，比如要记得自己按时吃药，好好睡觉，保持健康的饮食，适量运动，不舒服的时候要去看医生等等。中国有句古语，说“身体发肤，受之父母，不敢毁伤，孝之始也”。这句话的意思用比较新的方法诠释就是说：父母最爱的就是你，所以照顾好自己就是孝顺最好的方法。当你成为母亲的那天，你就会理解这些。在那天之前，听妈妈的，你一定要好好照顾自己。
College is the four years where you have:
• the greatest amount of free time
• the first chance to be independent
• the most flexibility to change
• the lowest risk for making mistakes
So please treasure your college years – make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.
大学是你自由时间最多的四年。
大学是你第一次学会独立的四年。
大学是可塑性最强的四年。
大学是犯错代价最低的四年。
所以，珍惜你的大学时光吧，好好利用你的空闲时间，成为掌握自己命运的独立思考者，发展自己的多元化才能，大胆地去尝试，通过不断的成功和挑战来学习和成长，成为融汇中西的人才。
When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said “bonne chance”, which means “good luck” and “good courage”. Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.
当我在2005年面对人生最大的挑战时，你给了我大大的拥抱，还跟我说了一句法语“bonne chance”。这句话代表“祝你勇敢，祝你好运！”现在，我也想跟你说同样的话，bonne chance，我的天使和公主，希望哥伦比亚成为你一生中最快乐的四年，希望你成为你梦想成为的人！
Love,
Dad (& Mom)
爱你的，
爸爸（和妈妈）
Monday, September 28, 2009
美国正出现一支长期失业大军
美国正出现一支长期失业大军
http://news.creaders.net/headline/newsViewer.php?nid=404933&id=929022&dcid=1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
华尔街日报 2009-09-27 23:27:48
电脑专家雅各布斯(Bill Jacobs)失业9个月来一直在找工作，却毫无所获。他突然想到，这9个月本身或许正是症结之一。
一个线索是今年夏天他与一位招聘人员的对话。第一个问题是，你是什么时候被裁员的？下一个问题就是，在那之后你怎么一直没工作？美国有近1,500万失业人口。尽管经济慢慢开始复苏，预计失业数据仍会居高不下。很多失业者面临的一个问题正是他们失业赋闲很久这一事实。
其中约有500万失业者属于经济学家所说的“长期失业者”，也就是失业27周甚至更久的人。尽管在目前的经济形势下，找工作已经很难；对那些失业时间较长的人来说，挑战更是艰巨。
他们的技能退化。开始意志消沉，并可能变成永久性的。一些潜在的雇主纷纷对他们避而远之。
由于士气低落，一些失业数月的人逐渐淡出了就业大军，转而提前申请工会退休金或社会保障福利，或是试图参加其他政府计划，比如社会保障为无工作能力的人提供的救济。
哈佛大学经济学家卡兹(Lawrence Katz)和芝加哥大学经济学家迈耶(Bruce Meyer)上世纪80年代进行的研究显示，一个人失业时间越长，找到工作的几率越小。卡兹说，失业6个月的人在下个月找到工作的几率要远远低于失业1个月的人。
现在的问题是：失业超过26周的人约占总失业人口的三分之一，为二战以来的最高比例。
卡兹、迈耶和其他研究人员还发现，失业者找到新工作后，预期的工资也往往会随着失业时间的增长而降低。
在面临这一难题的失业很久的成年人中，有越来越多的人似乎开始放弃努力。劳动力参与率──有工作或在积极找工作的适龄人员的比例──8月份为65.5%。据美国劳工部的数据，这是22年来的最低。
越来越多的人开始申请社会保障为无工作能力的人提供的救济。只要能提供证据证明自己有身体疾病，可能在至少一年内无法工作，就可以申请这项救济。随着婴儿潮时出生的人逐渐变老，参与该计划的人数在衰退前就已经开始上升；不过经济低迷导致申请的速度更快了。今年前8个月，社会安全局(Social Security Administration)收到了190万份无工作能力救济的申请，较去年同期增加23%。
麻省理工学院经济学家奥托(David Autor)说, 出现非常严重的衰退会让许多本可以继续工作的人申请无工作能力救济。它就像一张单程车票，申请以后你就等于退出了劳动力市场，进入接受政府救助的行列。
这类做法会对联邦支出产生影响。去年，社会保障总署(Social Security Administration)支出了约1,060亿美元的无工作能力救济金，相当于联邦预算的近4%。这个数字比4年前增长了三分之一左右。
社会保障总署首席精算师戈斯(Stephen Goss)说，该机构估计2009年至2011年期间，与没有出现衰退的情况相比，申请无工作能力救济的人数会高出约100万。如果批准率保持不变，这将在2011年末前新增加约50万名受救济者。
迄今为止，政府应对长期失业的措施主要是延长失业救济，这种支持手段能避免工人闹事，但却可能让一些人因失业而变得懒散，不再积极寻找工作。联邦政府将标准的26周的救济期延长了20周，对一些失业率较高的州，部分工人最长可享受79周的救济。
已失业15个月之久的缅因州电工劳伦斯(Phillip Lawrence)已处于最后一次延长期内，将面临没有选择的境地。
劳伦斯的职业生涯基本都在一家造纸厂度过。2008年6月失业时，他在一家造船厂工作，每小时工资16美元。他曾申请过零售商、医院和学校的工作，或尝试暖通等职业。
他说，找工作完全与身体条件有关。59岁的他觉得退休还太年轻，而学习新技能又太老了。他说，在我这个岁数，我不能指望再回学校读4年书了。
劳伦斯每周获得340美元失业救济，去年还通过转按揭获得了一些物业套现的现金。为了节约开支，他在家中以木柴取暖。为了有些事干，他会重新装修浴室或是建一条新的走廊。他说，这只是为了保持头脑清醒。
如果劳伦斯选择就此退休，他每月可以获得340美元的工会退休金，但会因提前支取而遭到罚款。他说，通过房屋转按揭获得的钱是他目前唯一的生存途径。
哈佛大学的卡兹说，更大的担忧是即使经济复苏后，我们可能也会看到很多人脱离了劳动力市场。
http://news.creaders.net/headline/newsViewer.php?nid=404933&id=929022&dcid=1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
华尔街日报 2009-09-27 23:27:48
电脑专家雅各布斯(Bill Jacobs)失业9个月来一直在找工作，却毫无所获。他突然想到，这9个月本身或许正是症结之一。
一个线索是今年夏天他与一位招聘人员的对话。第一个问题是，你是什么时候被裁员的？下一个问题就是，在那之后你怎么一直没工作？美国有近1,500万失业人口。尽管经济慢慢开始复苏，预计失业数据仍会居高不下。很多失业者面临的一个问题正是他们失业赋闲很久这一事实。
其中约有500万失业者属于经济学家所说的“长期失业者”，也就是失业27周甚至更久的人。尽管在目前的经济形势下，找工作已经很难；对那些失业时间较长的人来说，挑战更是艰巨。
他们的技能退化。开始意志消沉，并可能变成永久性的。一些潜在的雇主纷纷对他们避而远之。
由于士气低落，一些失业数月的人逐渐淡出了就业大军，转而提前申请工会退休金或社会保障福利，或是试图参加其他政府计划，比如社会保障为无工作能力的人提供的救济。
哈佛大学经济学家卡兹(Lawrence Katz)和芝加哥大学经济学家迈耶(Bruce Meyer)上世纪80年代进行的研究显示，一个人失业时间越长，找到工作的几率越小。卡兹说，失业6个月的人在下个月找到工作的几率要远远低于失业1个月的人。
现在的问题是：失业超过26周的人约占总失业人口的三分之一，为二战以来的最高比例。
卡兹、迈耶和其他研究人员还发现，失业者找到新工作后，预期的工资也往往会随着失业时间的增长而降低。
在面临这一难题的失业很久的成年人中，有越来越多的人似乎开始放弃努力。劳动力参与率──有工作或在积极找工作的适龄人员的比例──8月份为65.5%。据美国劳工部的数据，这是22年来的最低。
越来越多的人开始申请社会保障为无工作能力的人提供的救济。只要能提供证据证明自己有身体疾病，可能在至少一年内无法工作，就可以申请这项救济。随着婴儿潮时出生的人逐渐变老，参与该计划的人数在衰退前就已经开始上升；不过经济低迷导致申请的速度更快了。今年前8个月，社会安全局(Social Security Administration)收到了190万份无工作能力救济的申请，较去年同期增加23%。
麻省理工学院经济学家奥托(David Autor)说, 出现非常严重的衰退会让许多本可以继续工作的人申请无工作能力救济。它就像一张单程车票，申请以后你就等于退出了劳动力市场，进入接受政府救助的行列。
这类做法会对联邦支出产生影响。去年，社会保障总署(Social Security Administration)支出了约1,060亿美元的无工作能力救济金，相当于联邦预算的近4%。这个数字比4年前增长了三分之一左右。
社会保障总署首席精算师戈斯(Stephen Goss)说，该机构估计2009年至2011年期间，与没有出现衰退的情况相比，申请无工作能力救济的人数会高出约100万。如果批准率保持不变，这将在2011年末前新增加约50万名受救济者。
迄今为止，政府应对长期失业的措施主要是延长失业救济，这种支持手段能避免工人闹事，但却可能让一些人因失业而变得懒散，不再积极寻找工作。联邦政府将标准的26周的救济期延长了20周，对一些失业率较高的州，部分工人最长可享受79周的救济。
已失业15个月之久的缅因州电工劳伦斯(Phillip Lawrence)已处于最后一次延长期内，将面临没有选择的境地。
劳伦斯的职业生涯基本都在一家造纸厂度过。2008年6月失业时，他在一家造船厂工作，每小时工资16美元。他曾申请过零售商、医院和学校的工作，或尝试暖通等职业。
他说，找工作完全与身体条件有关。59岁的他觉得退休还太年轻，而学习新技能又太老了。他说，在我这个岁数，我不能指望再回学校读4年书了。
劳伦斯每周获得340美元失业救济，去年还通过转按揭获得了一些物业套现的现金。为了节约开支，他在家中以木柴取暖。为了有些事干，他会重新装修浴室或是建一条新的走廊。他说，这只是为了保持头脑清醒。
如果劳伦斯选择就此退休，他每月可以获得340美元的工会退休金，但会因提前支取而遭到罚款。他说，通过房屋转按揭获得的钱是他目前唯一的生存途径。
哈佛大学的卡兹说，更大的担忧是即使经济复苏后，我们可能也会看到很多人脱离了劳动力市场。
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Assessing the net value of children 美国社会养孩子回报率太低
Assessing the net value of children
The U.S. birth rate is falling. One explanation: a diminishing return on investment.
http://money.cnn.com/2009/08/31/magazines/fortune/children_value_benefits.fortune/index.htm
Fortune Magazine) -- What is the value of a child in modern Western industrial society? More specifically, what is the value of a middle-class or upper-middle-class or upper-class child in America? And does this have anything to do with the fact that the birth rate among American women has been falling for decades and that the age of first childbirth among educated women is far higher than among less-well-educated women?
Start with economics. People in a free society will choose to have more of something if its return exceeds its cost. On the other hand, people in a free society will choose to have less of a good or service if its value is less than its cost.
Now, what is a modern child? Obviously, not a good or service, but something more and also something less. Long ago, as we all know, humans had children because they liked having sex and because children had some value as assistant hunters and gatherers and keepers of the hearth.
Then, as society became more organized, families chose to have children because the parents (we assume) still liked having sex and the resulting children were helpful on the farm or the ranch or in the village smithy. The kids did not require much -- just food and shelter and occasional loving and cuffing about to keep them in line.
Now we can have sex without having children. That is a major factor in life, but by itself it does not explain why people do not necessarily want to have kids.
Maybe the reason is largely because raising modern children is such a major pain in the neck. For one thing, thanks to a variety of factors, often parents have to struggle like galley slaves to get their offspring into private schools and pay for them.
The private school parent also has to pony up for every kind of lesson -- ballet, horse, and music lessons, math tutoring, and chess club. The parent also has to drive the little ones to all of these events as well as to the "play dates" that lurk like unanesthetized colonoscopies in modern life. Then there is the most horrible event a healthy upper-middle-class American can have: social engagements with the parents of Junior's classmates.
In other words, we are talking about child rearing as part unpaid chauffeur, part torture.
Then there is college and a real course in horrors getting the darling in somewhere that won't embarrass you in front of your pals at the club. That's before paying for the school, which is a stunning slap in the face. Total college costs at a "prestige" school can easily touch $70,000 a year, real money for most people.
And after graduation day, what do you get for having the system holding you by your ankles and shaking all the money out of your pockets? You might have a son with a law degree who cannot get a job, a daughter with a film-school degree who works as a masseuse, or a musician who keeps you up all night with his drums.
You are very likely to have one who cannot spell "gratitude" and has a sense of entitlement that would make Marie Antoinette blush. How many of each kind have you observed with your own eyes? I might add that by pure luck, my wife and I do have a dutiful, helpful son and daughter-in-law. How this happened I am not quite sure.
But my son is an aberration, as far as I can tell. Look around you. The costs and benefits of having children in affluent America are wildly off kilter. Too much cost, too little reward. Often the cost-benefit analysis of children prints out "Get a German shorthaired pointer instead."
Many people are doing that, and the birth rate is collapsing. But if we stop having enough children, because their value is so low relative to their cost, the society grinds down. It's happening right now. The native-born upper middle class barely replace themselves in America, if they do at all. In a way we are committing suicide as a class, possibly in part because of the burdens of child rearing in modern life.
What is the net present value of a child in modern America? Often, it's difficult to find much, and thereby hangs a question mark over our future as a nation, at least as we have known it.
Ben Stein is an actor, lawyer, writer, and economist who also appears in commercials as a spokesman for various companies.
在现代西方工业社会中，一个孩子的价值是多少 更具体一点说，美国中产阶级，上中层阶级或者下层阶级中一个孩子的价值究竟是多少 这一点是否和数十年来美国妇女生育率持续下降，以及受过教育的妇女生育第一个孩子的年龄要比没有受过同样教育的人高得多的实事相关联
先从经济学的角度说起吧。自由社会的人将会选择更多回报超过成本的东西。反之，自由社会的人同样会不选择那些价值不及价格的商品或服务。
然么，怎样看待孩子呢 显然他们不是商品也不是服务，某些方面的特质是商品不具备的，某些方面还想由不及商品。远古时期，正如我们都知道的，人类要孩子一方面是生理需要，一方面也可以帮他们打猎，采摘和看守炉火。
然后，社会进化得更有组织性，家庭选择要孩子一方面还是生理需要，一方面是因为孩子们可以在农场，牧场或是铁匠铺中充当助手。孩子们的需求不多，不过是吃饱穿暖有地方住，偶尔给与他们一些爱抚，或是办错事时教训一下他们。
现在我们可以控制生育。但是仅凭这一点也许不能完全解释为什么人们不一定需要孩子。
可能一个主要的原因就是现在孩子给父母们带来了很多难题。其中之一就是，由于各种各样的原因是，父母们经常需要累死累活才能给后代提供到私立学校受良好教育的机会。
私立学校上学的孩子的父母也需要为各种各样的课程付费：芭蕾课，马术课，音乐课，数学辅导，还有象棋俱乐部等等。另外家长还要让孩子去接受诸如不施麻醉的结肠镜检查等各种医检。健康的中上层美国孩子的家长还必须面对这样的场面：和孩子同学的家长进行社交往来。
一句话，现代社会抚养孩子就意味着当免费的私人司机，还要受到各种折磨。
然后就是大学了。大学学费会让很多家长大跌眼镜。一所“有名望的”大学每年的学费动则就会到$70，000，这对很多美国人来说是相当可观的一笔数字。
接着到了大学大学毕业那一天，在受了这么多年苦，花了这么多钱后，你会得到什么呢 你儿子可能法学院毕业却找不到工作，女儿电影学院毕业很可能去当了按摩师，或者你可能有个音乐家儿子，整晚敲鼓让你没法睡觉。
你还很可能有一个不知感恩为何物，认为一切理所当然的孩子。这样的例子你一定亲眼看到了不少。笔者本人纯凭运气，有一对孝顺的儿子儿媳。我自己也不清楚怎会有这样的运气。
但是据我所知，我儿子纯属意外偏差。看看你的周围吧。富裕美国家庭抚养孩子的成本和收益大大不平衡。成本太高，收益太小。经常在作完养孩子的成本收益分析后，你会得到这样的结论：“不如去养条德国短毛猎犬吧！”
很多人确实是这样选择的，所以出生率下降了。但是因为养孩子成本收益率太低，就不抚养足够多的孩子，社会也会出现危机。现在已经出现了这种情况：本土出生的美国上中层阶级很少能子承父业了。由于在现代社会抚养孩子的负担太重，在某种程度上说，作为一个阶级我们正在自杀。
现代美国社会中孩子的现在净价值是多少 我们很难得出很高的价值。这也为美国的未来带来了一个问题。
The U.S. birth rate is falling. One explanation: a diminishing return on investment.
http://money.cnn.com/2009/08/31/magazines/fortune/children_value_benefits.fortune/index.htm
Fortune Magazine) -- What is the value of a child in modern Western industrial society? More specifically, what is the value of a middle-class or upper-middle-class or upper-class child in America? And does this have anything to do with the fact that the birth rate among American women has been falling for decades and that the age of first childbirth among educated women is far higher than among less-well-educated women?
Start with economics. People in a free society will choose to have more of something if its return exceeds its cost. On the other hand, people in a free society will choose to have less of a good or service if its value is less than its cost.
Now, what is a modern child? Obviously, not a good or service, but something more and also something less. Long ago, as we all know, humans had children because they liked having sex and because children had some value as assistant hunters and gatherers and keepers of the hearth.
Then, as society became more organized, families chose to have children because the parents (we assume) still liked having sex and the resulting children were helpful on the farm or the ranch or in the village smithy. The kids did not require much -- just food and shelter and occasional loving and cuffing about to keep them in line.
Now we can have sex without having children. That is a major factor in life, but by itself it does not explain why people do not necessarily want to have kids.
Maybe the reason is largely because raising modern children is such a major pain in the neck. For one thing, thanks to a variety of factors, often parents have to struggle like galley slaves to get their offspring into private schools and pay for them.
The private school parent also has to pony up for every kind of lesson -- ballet, horse, and music lessons, math tutoring, and chess club. The parent also has to drive the little ones to all of these events as well as to the "play dates" that lurk like unanesthetized colonoscopies in modern life. Then there is the most horrible event a healthy upper-middle-class American can have: social engagements with the parents of Junior's classmates.
In other words, we are talking about child rearing as part unpaid chauffeur, part torture.
Then there is college and a real course in horrors getting the darling in somewhere that won't embarrass you in front of your pals at the club. That's before paying for the school, which is a stunning slap in the face. Total college costs at a "prestige" school can easily touch $70,000 a year, real money for most people.
And after graduation day, what do you get for having the system holding you by your ankles and shaking all the money out of your pockets? You might have a son with a law degree who cannot get a job, a daughter with a film-school degree who works as a masseuse, or a musician who keeps you up all night with his drums.
You are very likely to have one who cannot spell "gratitude" and has a sense of entitlement that would make Marie Antoinette blush. How many of each kind have you observed with your own eyes? I might add that by pure luck, my wife and I do have a dutiful, helpful son and daughter-in-law. How this happened I am not quite sure.
But my son is an aberration, as far as I can tell. Look around you. The costs and benefits of having children in affluent America are wildly off kilter. Too much cost, too little reward. Often the cost-benefit analysis of children prints out "Get a German shorthaired pointer instead."
Many people are doing that, and the birth rate is collapsing. But if we stop having enough children, because their value is so low relative to their cost, the society grinds down. It's happening right now. The native-born upper middle class barely replace themselves in America, if they do at all. In a way we are committing suicide as a class, possibly in part because of the burdens of child rearing in modern life.
What is the net present value of a child in modern America? Often, it's difficult to find much, and thereby hangs a question mark over our future as a nation, at least as we have known it.
Ben Stein is an actor, lawyer, writer, and economist who also appears in commercials as a spokesman for various companies.
在现代西方工业社会中，一个孩子的价值是多少 更具体一点说，美国中产阶级，上中层阶级或者下层阶级中一个孩子的价值究竟是多少 这一点是否和数十年来美国妇女生育率持续下降，以及受过教育的妇女生育第一个孩子的年龄要比没有受过同样教育的人高得多的实事相关联
先从经济学的角度说起吧。自由社会的人将会选择更多回报超过成本的东西。反之，自由社会的人同样会不选择那些价值不及价格的商品或服务。
然么，怎样看待孩子呢 显然他们不是商品也不是服务，某些方面的特质是商品不具备的，某些方面还想由不及商品。远古时期，正如我们都知道的，人类要孩子一方面是生理需要，一方面也可以帮他们打猎，采摘和看守炉火。
然后，社会进化得更有组织性，家庭选择要孩子一方面还是生理需要，一方面是因为孩子们可以在农场，牧场或是铁匠铺中充当助手。孩子们的需求不多，不过是吃饱穿暖有地方住，偶尔给与他们一些爱抚，或是办错事时教训一下他们。
现在我们可以控制生育。但是仅凭这一点也许不能完全解释为什么人们不一定需要孩子。
可能一个主要的原因就是现在孩子给父母们带来了很多难题。其中之一就是，由于各种各样的原因是，父母们经常需要累死累活才能给后代提供到私立学校受良好教育的机会。
私立学校上学的孩子的父母也需要为各种各样的课程付费：芭蕾课，马术课，音乐课，数学辅导，还有象棋俱乐部等等。另外家长还要让孩子去接受诸如不施麻醉的结肠镜检查等各种医检。健康的中上层美国孩子的家长还必须面对这样的场面：和孩子同学的家长进行社交往来。
一句话，现代社会抚养孩子就意味着当免费的私人司机，还要受到各种折磨。
然后就是大学了。大学学费会让很多家长大跌眼镜。一所“有名望的”大学每年的学费动则就会到$70，000，这对很多美国人来说是相当可观的一笔数字。
接着到了大学大学毕业那一天，在受了这么多年苦，花了这么多钱后，你会得到什么呢 你儿子可能法学院毕业却找不到工作，女儿电影学院毕业很可能去当了按摩师，或者你可能有个音乐家儿子，整晚敲鼓让你没法睡觉。
你还很可能有一个不知感恩为何物，认为一切理所当然的孩子。这样的例子你一定亲眼看到了不少。笔者本人纯凭运气，有一对孝顺的儿子儿媳。我自己也不清楚怎会有这样的运气。
但是据我所知，我儿子纯属意外偏差。看看你的周围吧。富裕美国家庭抚养孩子的成本和收益大大不平衡。成本太高，收益太小。经常在作完养孩子的成本收益分析后，你会得到这样的结论：“不如去养条德国短毛猎犬吧！”
很多人确实是这样选择的，所以出生率下降了。但是因为养孩子成本收益率太低，就不抚养足够多的孩子，社会也会出现危机。现在已经出现了这种情况：本土出生的美国上中层阶级很少能子承父业了。由于在现代社会抚养孩子的负担太重，在某种程度上说，作为一个阶级我们正在自杀。
现代美国社会中孩子的现在净价值是多少 我们很难得出很高的价值。这也为美国的未来带来了一个问题。
Ben Stein discovers children are expensive
Ben Stein, the economic commentator still most famous for playing a boring high school teacher in Ferris Bueller's Day Off, is questioning whether people should have children.
In his inaugural column in Fortune, he tries to explain a declining birth rate in the U.S. as an effect of the rising cost of having children. But there's something missing from his quirky analysis.
Stein starts by pointing out how birth control makes it possible to have sex without children, thus letting women work longer before having children. Then Stein moves in for the cost-benefit analysis kill. After bemoaning the costs of raising an upper middle class child -- from horseback riding lessons to private college ($70,000 a year by his estimation) -- he notes that such an expensive upbringing often leads to an ungrateful and unemployed "adult" who lives at home. (He makes it clear, however, that this argument does not apply to him and his wife since they have done such a marvelous job of raising their son.)
I agree with Stein in part -- the cost of raising a child is really high and it's grown. But as an "economist", he leaves out the benefit side from his cost-benefit argument. This might be good politics because it leaves to the reader's imagination how he might put a number on how parents benefit from having children -- and frees him from the resulting criticism.
Instead, he alludes to ways of quantifying the benefits. He suggests that when parents worked on farms, children were valuable to the extent that they saved farmers from hiring laborers. But now there is no way to put a number on the value of children. If the children earn salaries and make profits on their investment decisions, none of that money flows to their parents.
So Stein should never have tried to apply a cost-benefit analysis to children -- or if he does so, he should go out on a limb and try to quantify their benefit.
http://www.dailyfinance.com/2009/09/02/ben-stein-discovers-children-are-expensive/
Stein has some quirks of his own. As Gawker reported, he calls himself an economist even though he has no graduate training in economics -- he has a BA in the subject from Columbia. Perhaps the fact that his father, Herb Stein, was a trained economist has something to do with this exaggeration.
And he was recently fired as a New York Times columnist for appearing as a spokesperson in TV commercials -- such as one from FreeScore which gives consumers their credit score for free but charges them $30 a month for the credit report behind the score. But Stein has landed on his feet at Fortune -- which still shares parent Time Warner (TWX) with Daily Finance.
For the record, I am a big fan of having children and believe that while they are expensive, they're worth every penny even though I cannot find any economic justification for them.
In his inaugural column in Fortune, he tries to explain a declining birth rate in the U.S. as an effect of the rising cost of having children. But there's something missing from his quirky analysis.
Stein starts by pointing out how birth control makes it possible to have sex without children, thus letting women work longer before having children. Then Stein moves in for the cost-benefit analysis kill. After bemoaning the costs of raising an upper middle class child -- from horseback riding lessons to private college ($70,000 a year by his estimation) -- he notes that such an expensive upbringing often leads to an ungrateful and unemployed "adult" who lives at home. (He makes it clear, however, that this argument does not apply to him and his wife since they have done such a marvelous job of raising their son.)
I agree with Stein in part -- the cost of raising a child is really high and it's grown. But as an "economist", he leaves out the benefit side from his cost-benefit argument. This might be good politics because it leaves to the reader's imagination how he might put a number on how parents benefit from having children -- and frees him from the resulting criticism.
Instead, he alludes to ways of quantifying the benefits. He suggests that when parents worked on farms, children were valuable to the extent that they saved farmers from hiring laborers. But now there is no way to put a number on the value of children. If the children earn salaries and make profits on their investment decisions, none of that money flows to their parents.
So Stein should never have tried to apply a cost-benefit analysis to children -- or if he does so, he should go out on a limb and try to quantify their benefit.
http://www.dailyfinance.com/2009/09/02/ben-stein-discovers-children-are-expensive/
Stein has some quirks of his own. As Gawker reported, he calls himself an economist even though he has no graduate training in economics -- he has a BA in the subject from Columbia. Perhaps the fact that his father, Herb Stein, was a trained economist has something to do with this exaggeration.
And he was recently fired as a New York Times columnist for appearing as a spokesperson in TV commercials -- such as one from FreeScore which gives consumers their credit score for free but charges them $30 a month for the credit report behind the score. But Stein has landed on his feet at Fortune -- which still shares parent Time Warner (TWX) with Daily Finance.
For the record, I am a big fan of having children and believe that while they are expensive, they're worth every penny even though I cannot find any economic justification for them.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
华裔女会计师 北美职场发光
华裔女会计师 北美职场发光
http://news.creaders.net/immigration/newsViewer.php?nid=403909&id=926932
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
世界日报 2009-09-19 09:41:52
Angela Chang，这位美国注册会计师，同时也在国际前四大会计师事务所温哥华分部工作超过十年的北京女子，最近出版「CPA女子：北美职场篇」，将进入北美会计行业必备的窍门、会计执照的种类等，一一剖析，引导学子深入了解会计业及北美职场文化。
她表示，会计业已是北美前5%高薪的行业，更是不少学子嚮往的职业。她在书中举例美国教授Robert E. Kelley在1985年所出版的书「金领阶级员工」，以此来比喻「会计执照即是进入金领阶级的护照」。
但是她发现了一个事实，就是每年修读会计的亚洲大学生很多，但是真正成为会计师的却少之又少。Angela指出，据美国2008年会计师的供给需求报告，会计事务所中只有6%的亚洲人。因此，决定着手撰写该书。「写这本书之前，我读了100本的书，将所有会计执照取得的相关知识以及个人经验一併彙整，希望能帮助年轻学子，尤其是华人学子。」Angela说。
书中她一一分析会计师证照种类、证照选择要素、美国与加拿大证照系统的不同，甚至包括会计师晋升诀窍，毫不保留与读者分享。
拥有麦其尔大学金融及商业学士学位，及美国德州大学会计硕士学位的她，在知名会计事务所短短四年内即升上经理开始带人，旗下几乎全是白人员工。
如何做到？她说：「主动很重要。当我还在低阶的时候，我会主动提出要帮老闆安排会议，以及请老闆带我去开会，这样我就可以从旁观察学习。」她表示，自己会静静观察成功的人都在做什麽，后来发现成功的人经常打电话，主动联繫客户。这与习惯在办公室埋头苦干的亚洲人，完全不同。她强调，晋升的关键除了「基本工一定要练好」之外，尚包括重要会议一定要多发言，勇于表达己见。另外应永远与客户保持联繫，建立人脉。
身为女性会计师，她在书中也鼓励女性要及早累积财富，因为「财力、活力与魅力并存」。她认为经济能力不但影响美丽，也与魅力息息相关，更引用台湾作家刘忆如在「女人就是要有钱」中所述：「因为有了足够的经济能力，生命才能够有活力，能够实现自己的梦想。」鼓励女性，善加管理财务。
http://news.creaders.net/immigration/newsViewer.php?nid=403909&id=926932
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
世界日报 2009-09-19 09:41:52
Angela Chang，这位美国注册会计师，同时也在国际前四大会计师事务所温哥华分部工作超过十年的北京女子，最近出版「CPA女子：北美职场篇」，将进入北美会计行业必备的窍门、会计执照的种类等，一一剖析，引导学子深入了解会计业及北美职场文化。
她表示，会计业已是北美前5%高薪的行业，更是不少学子嚮往的职业。她在书中举例美国教授Robert E. Kelley在1985年所出版的书「金领阶级员工」，以此来比喻「会计执照即是进入金领阶级的护照」。
但是她发现了一个事实，就是每年修读会计的亚洲大学生很多，但是真正成为会计师的却少之又少。Angela指出，据美国2008年会计师的供给需求报告，会计事务所中只有6%的亚洲人。因此，决定着手撰写该书。「写这本书之前，我读了100本的书，将所有会计执照取得的相关知识以及个人经验一併彙整，希望能帮助年轻学子，尤其是华人学子。」Angela说。
书中她一一分析会计师证照种类、证照选择要素、美国与加拿大证照系统的不同，甚至包括会计师晋升诀窍，毫不保留与读者分享。
拥有麦其尔大学金融及商业学士学位，及美国德州大学会计硕士学位的她，在知名会计事务所短短四年内即升上经理开始带人，旗下几乎全是白人员工。
如何做到？她说：「主动很重要。当我还在低阶的时候，我会主动提出要帮老闆安排会议，以及请老闆带我去开会，这样我就可以从旁观察学习。」她表示，自己会静静观察成功的人都在做什麽，后来发现成功的人经常打电话，主动联繫客户。这与习惯在办公室埋头苦干的亚洲人，完全不同。她强调，晋升的关键除了「基本工一定要练好」之外，尚包括重要会议一定要多发言，勇于表达己见。另外应永远与客户保持联繫，建立人脉。
身为女性会计师，她在书中也鼓励女性要及早累积财富，因为「财力、活力与魅力并存」。她认为经济能力不但影响美丽，也与魅力息息相关，更引用台湾作家刘忆如在「女人就是要有钱」中所述：「因为有了足够的经济能力，生命才能够有活力，能够实现自己的梦想。」鼓励女性，善加管理财务。
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Fatwallet discussion about : Renting Forever - Never Buying A House
http://www.fatwallet.com/forums/finance/952329/
This is something I have been thinking of for a while and wanted to solidify some thoughts to start a new discussion. The premise of the discussion is renting forever.
Home ownership is something that has been said to me my entire life as a great thing. I grew up when home prices were going up 5% per year and then 10 to 20% per year and then 50% per year during the bubble. People talked about how great investments their homes were, and tax writeoffs and such.
Now that I am an adult and considering the possibility of home ownership, it seems almost ridiculous that anyone would want to own a home. I say this even excluding fluctuations in financial value of the home. Considering financial implications of downside, it makes the thought of homeownership seem ridiculous.
Reasons why I dont want to own a home:
1) Reduce embedded-ness to local municipality. If a new mayor comes in and changes things in a way I dont like, I can just move if I rent. Its much more difficult if you own a home. Traffic light cameras enter the city? Vote with my dollars and LEAVE. Pay the 1 month penalty to break the least and move a few miles to the next city. Write a letter to city hall with copies of my lease-termination letter and explain why I moved and will refuse to use businesses in their "police-state." Raise property taxes to support ridiculous projects or increased salary to councilmen? GOODBYE! By myself I look like a crazy person who will be ignored but imagine if 10 people moved. Or 100? Or 1000? Most people are sheep but I feel renting gives me leverage over the local government.
2) Reduce embedded-ness from state. If a new governor comes in and changes things I can leave. Its harder to find a new job in another state than simply commute a little further from a nearby city, but it's easier to do than selling a house/buying a new house and moving.
3) I dont want to take care of things. Mowing grass, fixing washer/drier, maintaining roof. No thanks. From everything I read, most new homeowners severely underestimate the costs of maintaining a home when running renting versus owning calculators. I have heard maintenance can run about 3% per year of the value of the home. The time-cost of taking care of things is also high. I could be using that time to get a promotion at work or get a second or third girlfriend on the side.
4) Eminent Domain. The chance of it happening is rare, but you dont really "own" the home. The government lets you live there and can take it from you at any time. I am moderately mentally ill and if I owned a home I would likely build an underground nuclear shelter and hide things in the walls and such. That's a lot of trouble to go through for something you cant really guarantee you will get to keep forever.
5) Property Taxes mean you never own the home. If you stop paying the taxes, the city takes the house from you. So really when people say "The house is paid off, I can retire" they mean "I have to pay property taxes forever." Considering taxes are only going up, its not something I want to lock myself into. 10 years into retirement, I dont want to sell my house to get a smaller place with less taxes. I realize taxes are built into rent prices, but with rent, I know I am going to be paying rent forever. With a house, you are still going to be paying forever.
6) Lack of flexibility in new jobs. Get a job offer in another state? Sure no problem, give me 9 months to sell my house and another 6 months to find a new house in the new area! Screw that! Rent and be flexible and able to move to where the money is!
7) You can rent a house if you want to live in a house. You dont only have to rent apartments or condos. All the arguments about it sucks to live in an apartment are negated if you rent a house.
8) Non-leveraged approach to investing. With a house, you have to put 20% down and have 5x leverage. If the house goes down, you are screwed. With an apartment, you can take the money you would have put as a downpayment, and invest it into REITs, Stocks, Bonds, etc in whatever risk-adjusted assset allocation you desire, without having to use leverage. Leverage is a terrible idea to use in investments. If you dont consider the house an investment (which you should NOT) then consider the lost opportunity cost of not being able to invest the downpayment into legitimate investments.
9) No Itemizing. For a lot of people, itemizing doesnt make sense unless you own a house. Thus by owning a house you are forced to itemize and forgo the $5k standard deduction. So if you are writing-off $10k in mortgage interest, you really only saved $5k additional write-offs.
10) You dont get to be an American hero on CNN.
11) Reduced Liability. If the girlscouts come to your door to sell you cookies and fall on your steps then they sue you for medical damages. WTF? I didnt invite you into my house. If you dont clean the ice on the sidewalk in front of your house and someone slips they sue you. REALLY? How do people fall for this nonsense. This is one of my biggest ones. Sure you have homeowners insurance, but this means that you MUST have home owners insurance forever. One might believe that after the mortgage is paid off, you can stop paying insurance and take the risk yourself. The bigger risk is NOT in a fire, but its in the gardener cutting his finger off on his pruning shears and suing you. Not a big deal in a lot of states but in Florida (where I would like to live), homeowners insurance is around 2% to 3% of the value of the home annually.
Biggest problems with not owning a home:
1) Reduced Creditor protection. In Florida, Texas, and a few other states, your home is 100% protected from creditors. Its nice to have $100k in cash in the bank, but I would rather have $90k in equity of my house and $10k in cash to look like a worse target for lawsuit.
The way I plan on mitigating that threat is to save any additional taxable money in tax-deferred annuities after maxing out 401k/IRA. Annuities in Florida are also 100% protected from creditors, and I get the advantage of deferring the federal taxes on earnings. A few companies such as USAA offer very low expense options with little downside for long-term investing. When I am ready to retire, perhaps at age 40 or 50, I can annuitize it and use the payouts for my rent.
2) Not being able to build that underground nuclear shelter I always wanted. I can use the extra savings to buy some land out in the sticks to build a cabin in and store my canned beans and ammo.
******************
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:02p [link to this post]
The premise of the discussion is renting forever.Kind of like the argument about why own a cow if you can get the milk for free?
* reply
* quote
* Avatar
* blok
* Senior Member - 1K
alert mods
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:12p [link to this post]
There is nothing wrong with renting, I own multiple investment properties and rent my personal residents for many of the reasons above. I would agree for the most part that owning a home is a complete waste of money, but when I am older and ready to settle down I will be buying/building my own home, but for now I am very content with renting.
* reply
* quote
* Avatar
* gotsmack
* Member
alert mods
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:40p [link to this post]
TripleB, I agree with you, but there are some situations where it makes sense to buy though.
1. If you find the "Dream" place you deice to live for the rest of your life.
2. You're getting a crazy good deal in an area you're already loking to live.
3. You're just speculating that the prices in town are going to shoot up because something is happening in the area, such as building a new sports stadium or something.
Also I would never buy in an area that is not fairly developed, because why would someone buy from you later when they can just build a new house on a plot of land next door to you?
Here is a video of Peter Schiff discussing why owning during the bubble was a bad idea and noone listened to him.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgMclXX5msc
its a good video, but if you're short on time start watching from the 10:00 to 14:03
In a different video I can't find, he says that the only time he would buy is if you can use the $8k for new home buyers as a down payment and then walk away if the vlaue of the home falls.
This is something I have been thinking of for a while and wanted to solidify some thoughts to start a new discussion. The premise of the discussion is renting forever.
Home ownership is something that has been said to me my entire life as a great thing. I grew up when home prices were going up 5% per year and then 10 to 20% per year and then 50% per year during the bubble. People talked about how great investments their homes were, and tax writeoffs and such.
Now that I am an adult and considering the possibility of home ownership, it seems almost ridiculous that anyone would want to own a home. I say this even excluding fluctuations in financial value of the home. Considering financial implications of downside, it makes the thought of homeownership seem ridiculous.
Reasons why I dont want to own a home:
1) Reduce embedded-ness to local municipality. If a new mayor comes in and changes things in a way I dont like, I can just move if I rent. Its much more difficult if you own a home. Traffic light cameras enter the city? Vote with my dollars and LEAVE. Pay the 1 month penalty to break the least and move a few miles to the next city. Write a letter to city hall with copies of my lease-termination letter and explain why I moved and will refuse to use businesses in their "police-state." Raise property taxes to support ridiculous projects or increased salary to councilmen? GOODBYE! By myself I look like a crazy person who will be ignored but imagine if 10 people moved. Or 100? Or 1000? Most people are sheep but I feel renting gives me leverage over the local government.
2) Reduce embedded-ness from state. If a new governor comes in and changes things I can leave. Its harder to find a new job in another state than simply commute a little further from a nearby city, but it's easier to do than selling a house/buying a new house and moving.
3) I dont want to take care of things. Mowing grass, fixing washer/drier, maintaining roof. No thanks. From everything I read, most new homeowners severely underestimate the costs of maintaining a home when running renting versus owning calculators. I have heard maintenance can run about 3% per year of the value of the home. The time-cost of taking care of things is also high. I could be using that time to get a promotion at work or get a second or third girlfriend on the side.
4) Eminent Domain. The chance of it happening is rare, but you dont really "own" the home. The government lets you live there and can take it from you at any time. I am moderately mentally ill and if I owned a home I would likely build an underground nuclear shelter and hide things in the walls and such. That's a lot of trouble to go through for something you cant really guarantee you will get to keep forever.
5) Property Taxes mean you never own the home. If you stop paying the taxes, the city takes the house from you. So really when people say "The house is paid off, I can retire" they mean "I have to pay property taxes forever." Considering taxes are only going up, its not something I want to lock myself into. 10 years into retirement, I dont want to sell my house to get a smaller place with less taxes. I realize taxes are built into rent prices, but with rent, I know I am going to be paying rent forever. With a house, you are still going to be paying forever.
6) Lack of flexibility in new jobs. Get a job offer in another state? Sure no problem, give me 9 months to sell my house and another 6 months to find a new house in the new area! Screw that! Rent and be flexible and able to move to where the money is!
7) You can rent a house if you want to live in a house. You dont only have to rent apartments or condos. All the arguments about it sucks to live in an apartment are negated if you rent a house.
8) Non-leveraged approach to investing. With a house, you have to put 20% down and have 5x leverage. If the house goes down, you are screwed. With an apartment, you can take the money you would have put as a downpayment, and invest it into REITs, Stocks, Bonds, etc in whatever risk-adjusted assset allocation you desire, without having to use leverage. Leverage is a terrible idea to use in investments. If you dont consider the house an investment (which you should NOT) then consider the lost opportunity cost of not being able to invest the downpayment into legitimate investments.
9) No Itemizing. For a lot of people, itemizing doesnt make sense unless you own a house. Thus by owning a house you are forced to itemize and forgo the $5k standard deduction. So if you are writing-off $10k in mortgage interest, you really only saved $5k additional write-offs.
10) You dont get to be an American hero on CNN.
11) Reduced Liability. If the girlscouts come to your door to sell you cookies and fall on your steps then they sue you for medical damages. WTF? I didnt invite you into my house. If you dont clean the ice on the sidewalk in front of your house and someone slips they sue you. REALLY? How do people fall for this nonsense. This is one of my biggest ones. Sure you have homeowners insurance, but this means that you MUST have home owners insurance forever. One might believe that after the mortgage is paid off, you can stop paying insurance and take the risk yourself. The bigger risk is NOT in a fire, but its in the gardener cutting his finger off on his pruning shears and suing you. Not a big deal in a lot of states but in Florida (where I would like to live), homeowners insurance is around 2% to 3% of the value of the home annually.
Biggest problems with not owning a home:
1) Reduced Creditor protection. In Florida, Texas, and a few other states, your home is 100% protected from creditors. Its nice to have $100k in cash in the bank, but I would rather have $90k in equity of my house and $10k in cash to look like a worse target for lawsuit.
The way I plan on mitigating that threat is to save any additional taxable money in tax-deferred annuities after maxing out 401k/IRA. Annuities in Florida are also 100% protected from creditors, and I get the advantage of deferring the federal taxes on earnings. A few companies such as USAA offer very low expense options with little downside for long-term investing. When I am ready to retire, perhaps at age 40 or 50, I can annuitize it and use the payouts for my rent.
2) Not being able to build that underground nuclear shelter I always wanted. I can use the extra savings to buy some land out in the sticks to build a cabin in and store my canned beans and ammo.
******************
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:02p [link to this post]
The premise of the discussion is renting forever.Kind of like the argument about why own a cow if you can get the milk for free?
* reply
* quote
* Avatar
* blok
* Senior Member - 1K
alert mods
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:12p [link to this post]
There is nothing wrong with renting, I own multiple investment properties and rent my personal residents for many of the reasons above. I would agree for the most part that owning a home is a complete waste of money, but when I am older and ready to settle down I will be buying/building my own home, but for now I am very content with renting.
* reply
* quote
* Avatar
* gotsmack
* Member
alert mods
rated:
posted: Sep. 13, 2009 @ 3:40p [link to this post]
TripleB, I agree with you, but there are some situations where it makes sense to buy though.
1. If you find the "Dream" place you deice to live for the rest of your life.
2. You're getting a crazy good deal in an area you're already loking to live.
3. You're just speculating that the prices in town are going to shoot up because something is happening in the area, such as building a new sports stadium or something.
Also I would never buy in an area that is not fairly developed, because why would someone buy from you later when they can just build a new house on a plot of land next door to you?
Here is a video of Peter Schiff discussing why owning during the bubble was a bad idea and noone listened to him.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgMclXX5msc
its a good video, but if you're short on time start watching from the 10:00 to 14:03
In a different video I can't find, he says that the only time he would buy is if you can use the $8k for new home buyers as a down payment and then walk away if the vlaue of the home falls.
Monday, September 14, 2009
zt: paying off your debts
http://www.fatwallet.com/forums/finance/952265/
Our daughter was diagnosed with Autism last year. Since then we have been paying off all our debts to keep off the stress and wants to know if we are doing a right thing. we had investments into real estate, stocks, CDs, ESPP, ESOP, mutual funds etc. Ever since we heard the news, stopped investing further into real estate and stocks but continued the rest as it doesn't need much of our attention on a day-to-day basis. And, we wouldn't be able to take any further surprises atleast for time being.
Coming to loans, we owed 21k on credit cards, 14k on car, and 178k on mortgage. In the past year we were managed to pay off the credit cards, car and 32k on the mortgage (total of ~65k). We lived on rice 'n beans and cut off all the unnecessary expenses to reach the goal. The good thing is, we both enjoyed being living simple and celebrated every time we closed a loan. It also helped us to lose some weight and keeping us healthy 'n in shape.
So why are we doing it, and whats the plan going forward?
TWO main reasons - Peace and Planning for future. We would like to pay off all the debt, and start building wealth for my child that can last even after us. We would like to have a plan/system that supports through her life. I am 32 yrs and my wife(at-home) is 30 with one child(autistic) with an household income ~90k. Our next goal is to pay off around 50k further on the mortgage that brings down the loan to 100k. And, pay the whole mortgage in the following 2 yrs. We aren't open for any risky investments at this point and at the same time doesn't want to leave money in Savings/CD that yields 1-3% interest, rather payoff mortgage loan with 6% rate.
Please advice/suggest if we are doing a right thing, and let me know if you need further info.
I do see topics on paying off mortgage/debt etc, but its more on investment perspective and the family situations doesnt match with ours. Apologize if this is not the right forum to ask such questions, and appreciate if you could direct me to the right one.
********
Awesome progress so far. Just keep doing what you are doing... paying off your debts is a guaranteed return with no market risk.
Our daughter was diagnosed with Autism last year. Since then we have been paying off all our debts to keep off the stress and wants to know if we are doing a right thing. we had investments into real estate, stocks, CDs, ESPP, ESOP, mutual funds etc. Ever since we heard the news, stopped investing further into real estate and stocks but continued the rest as it doesn't need much of our attention on a day-to-day basis. And, we wouldn't be able to take any further surprises atleast for time being.
Coming to loans, we owed 21k on credit cards, 14k on car, and 178k on mortgage. In the past year we were managed to pay off the credit cards, car and 32k on the mortgage (total of ~65k). We lived on rice 'n beans and cut off all the unnecessary expenses to reach the goal. The good thing is, we both enjoyed being living simple and celebrated every time we closed a loan. It also helped us to lose some weight and keeping us healthy 'n in shape.
So why are we doing it, and whats the plan going forward?
TWO main reasons - Peace and Planning for future. We would like to pay off all the debt, and start building wealth for my child that can last even after us. We would like to have a plan/system that supports through her life. I am 32 yrs and my wife(at-home) is 30 with one child(autistic) with an household income ~90k. Our next goal is to pay off around 50k further on the mortgage that brings down the loan to 100k. And, pay the whole mortgage in the following 2 yrs. We aren't open for any risky investments at this point and at the same time doesn't want to leave money in Savings/CD that yields 1-3% interest, rather payoff mortgage loan with 6% rate.
Please advice/suggest if we are doing a right thing, and let me know if you need further info.
I do see topics on paying off mortgage/debt etc, but its more on investment perspective and the family situations doesnt match with ours. Apologize if this is not the right forum to ask such questions, and appreciate if you could direct me to the right one.
********
Awesome progress so far. Just keep doing what you are doing... paying off your debts is a guaranteed return with no market risk.
Friday, September 11, 2009
09年朱棣文哈佛毕业演讲 Steven Chu Harvard Commencement Address
Steven Chu Harvard Commencement Address
http://www.yeeyan.com/articles/view/adong/47533
声明：本文是在阮一峰的翻译基础上修改的。阮一峰的原作在这里。
http://www.ruanyifeng.com/blog/2009/0/remarks_of_stenven_chu_in_harvard_commencement_2009.html
他的翻译虽好，但是并没有把前半部分朱棣文搞笑的地方翻译出来。所以在这里重译。后半部分不再重译了。
我不清楚我自己能不能当得起哈佛大学毕业典礼演讲人的高标准。去年在此演讲的是亿万富翁小说家J.K.罗琳。她最早是读古典文学的。前年站在这里的是超亿万富翁慈善家比尔·盖茨。他是个电脑呆子。今年糟糕了，就剩下我了。我没钱，不过我起码还是个书呆子。
我感谢哈佛大学授予我荣誉学位，这项荣誉对我来说比你们想到的还要重要。你看，学术上我是我们家的异类。我的哥哥在麻省理工和哈佛拿了医学和哲学双料博士；我的弟弟在哈佛拿了法律学位。我本人得到诺贝尔奖的时候，我想我的妈妈会高兴。但并非如此。消息公布的那天早上，我给她打电话，她听了只说：“不错，不过你下次什么时候来看我啊？” 现在我在兄弟之中最后一个拿到了哈佛学位，也许这一次她可以满意了吧。
在哈佛大学毕业典礼上发表演说，还有一个难处，那就是你们中有些人可能对我从前人的演讲借用一部分有所不满。我请你们谅解我。这是因为我有两个理由。
首先，为了产生影响力，重复传递同样的信息很重要。在科学中，第一个发现者是重要的，但是成为公众所知的那最后一个做出这个发现的人也许更重要。
其次，一个借鉴他人的作者，跟随的是最优秀的前人的脚步。Ralph Waldo Emerson（爱默生，诗人）18岁就从哈佛毕业。他曾经写到：“我所有最棒的想法都被古人剽窃了。” 毕加索说，“好的艺术家借鉴，伟大的艺术家偷窃。”那为什么毕业典礼的演说者就需要更高的标准呢？
我向哈佛毕业生发表演说，这实在非常吊诡，因为如果当年要是我有胆子申请，哈佛一定会拒我。我的妻子是“Jean主任”。她曾经在斯坦福大学担任招生主任，她向我保证，如果有机会的话，她一定会拒绝我。当我把这篇演讲的草稿给她过目，她强烈反对我使用“拒绝”这个词.她从来不拒绝任何申请者。在拒绝信中她总是写：“我们无法提供你入学机会。”我实在搞不懂这两者的区别何在。毕竟，那些牛校的“招生主任”事实上就是“拒绝主任”。显然，我真需要好好学学市场营销。
不请自来的忠告
我的演讲将遵循毕业典礼演讲的经典结构。刚才是第一乐章——轻快的闲谈。接下来的第二乐章包括的是不请自来的忠告。这样的忠告不常被人珍视，很少有人铭记，更绝对不会被付诸实践。就像王尔德说的：“对于良好建议，唯一能做之事，就是把它送给别人，因为它对一个人自己来说没有任何用处。” 那么，忠告来了。第一，每当你取得成就的时候，不要忘记帮助过你的人。要感谢支持你的父母和朋友，要感谢那些启发过你的教授，而且尤其要感谢教的不怎么样的教授。有了他们，你就不得不自学。从长远看，自学能力是优秀的全面教育中必不可少的，这将成为你成功的关键。你应当去拥抱你的同学，感谢他们同你进行过的许多次彻夜长谈，这为你的教育带来了无法衡量的价值。当然，你还要感谢哈佛大学，如果你忘了，还有个负责提醒你的校友会。第二，在你们未来的人生中，培养一种慷慨大方的精神。在任何谈判中，都不要为了最后微小的一丁点利益讨价还价。不要把桌上的钱都拿走。在合作中，永远记住荣誉不是一个守恒的量。在一次成功合作中，任何一方都应获得全部荣誉的九成。
电影《Harvey》中，Jimmy Stewart扮演的角色Elwood P. Dowd，就完全理解这一点。他说：“多年前，母亲曾经对我说，‘Elwood，在这个世界上，你要么就做一个杠杠的聪明人，要么就做一个杠杠的好人。'” 这个嘛，我这些年都属于聪明人……我推荐做好人。你们可以告诉别人这是我说的。
我的第三个忠告是，当你马上开始生活的这个新阶段时，请跟随你的激情前进。如果你对任何东西都没有激情，就去寻找，找到之前誓不罢休。生命太短暂了，不能漠不关心的度过，你必须对某样东西倾注你的深情。我在你们这个年龄，是超级的一根筋，我的目标就是非成为物理学家不可。本科毕业后，我在加州大学伯克利分校又待了8年，读完了研究生，做完了博士后，然后去贝尔实验室待了9年。在这些年中，我关注的中心和职业上的全部乐趣，都来自物理学。
我还有最后一个忠告，就是说兴趣爱好固然重要，但是不应该是你的唯一目标。当你白发苍苍、垂垂老矣、回首人生时，你需要为自己做过的事感到自豪。你买到的物质享受，获得的荣誉，这些都不是自豪感的来源。自豪感只能来自那些你触摸过的生命，以及你在他们身上造成的改变。
在贝尔实验室待了9年后，我决定离开这个温暖舒适的象牙塔，走进我眼中的“真实世界”——大学。我对贝尔实验室的看法，可以引用描述Mary Poppins的话，“基本上在任何方面都十全十美”。但是，除了科学论文，我还想做出更多的贡献。我要去教书，培育我自己在科学上的后代。
我在斯坦福大学有一个好友兼杰出同事Ted Geballe。他也是从伯克利分校去了贝尔实验室，几年前又离开贝尔实验室去了斯坦福大学。他对我们的动机做出了最佳描述：
“在大学工作，最棒的部分就是学生。他们入校时生机勃勃，充满热情，思想开放，还没在生活的战斗中变得伤痕累累。虽然他们自己没有意识到，但是他们接受的是社会所能提供的最精华的教育。如果生命中还有一段时间是思想自由和充满创造力的话，那就是在大学里那段时光。入校时，学生们对课本上的一字一句毫不怀疑，渐渐地，他们发现课本和教授并不是无所不知的，于是他们开始独立思考。从那时起，就轮到我向他们学习了。”
我在贝尔实验室，斯坦福，伯克利教过的学生和博士后以及合作过的年轻同事，他们都非常优秀。他们中有30多人现在已经是教授了。许多人在全世界第一流的研究机构工作，也包括哈佛大学。我从他们身上学到了很多东西。即使现在，在少有的周末空暇时，我们剩下的生物物理研究组的成员还会和我在虚拟空间的以太世界里面相聚。
Madam President Faust, members of the Harvard Corporation and the Board of Overseers, faculty, family, friends, and, most importantly, today’s graduates,
Thank you for letting me share this wonderful day with you.
I am not sure I can live up to the high standards of Harvard Commencement speakers. Last year, J.K. Rowling, the billionaire novelist, who started as a classics student, graced this podium. The year before, Bill Gates, the mega-billionaire philanthropist and computer nerd stood here. Today, sadly, you have me. I am not wealthy, but at least I am a nerd.
I am grateful to receive an honorary degree from Harvard, an honor that means more to me than you might care to imagine. You see, I was the academic black sheep of my family. My older brother has an M.D./Ph.D. from MIT and Harvard while my younger brother has a law degree from Harvard. When I was awarded a Nobel Prize, I thought my mother would be pleased. Not so. When I called her on the morning of the announcement, she replied, “That’s nice, but when are you going to visit me next.” Now, as the last brother with a degree from Harvard, maybe, at last, she will be satisfied.
Another difficulty with giving a Harvard commencement address is that some of you may disapprove of the fact that I have borrowed material from previous speeches. I ask that you forgive me for two reasons.
First, in order to have impact,it is important to deliver the same message more than once. In science, it is important to be the first person to make a discovery, but it is even more important to be the last person to make that discovery.
Second, authors who borrow from others are following in the footsteps of the best. Ralph Waldo Emerson, who graduated from Harvard at the age of 18, noted “All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients.” Picasso declared “Good artists borrow. Great artists steal.” Why should commencement speakers be held to a higher standard?
I also want to point out the irony of speaking to graduates of an institution that would have rejected me, had I the chutzpah to apply. I am married to “Dean Jean,” the former dean of admissions at Stanford. She assures me that she would have rejected me, if given the chance. When I showed her a draft of this speech, she objected strongly to my use of the word “rejected.” She never rejected applicants; her letters stated that “we are unable to offer you admission.” I have difficulty understanding the difference. After all, deans of admissions of highly selective schools are in reality, “deans of rejection.” Clearly, I have a lot to learn about marketing.
My address will follow the classical sonata form of commencement addresses. The first movement, just presented, were light-hearted remarks. This next movement consists of unsolicited advice, which is rarely valued, seldom remembered, never followed. As Oscar Wilde said, “The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.” So, here comes the advice. First, every time you celebrate an achievement, be thankful to those who made it possible. Thank your parents and friends who supported you, thank your professors who were inspirational, and especially thank the other professors whose less-than-brilliant lectures forced you to teach yourself. Going forward, the ability to teach yourself is the hallmark of a great liberal arts education and will be the key to your success. To your fellow students who have added immeasurably to your education during those late night discussions, hug them. Also, of course, thank Harvard. Should you forget, there’s an alumni association to remind you. Second, in your future life, cultivate a generous spirit. In all negotiations, don’t bargain for the last, little advantage. Leave the change on the table. In your collaborations, always remember that “credit” is not a conserved quantity. In a successful collaboration, everybody gets 90 percent of the credit.
Jimmy Stewart, as Elwood P. Dowd in the movie “Harvey” got it exactly right. He said: “Years ago my mother used to say to me, ‘In this world, Elwood, you must be … she always used to call me Elwood … in this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.’” Well, for years I was smart. ... I recommend pleasant. You may quote me on that.
My third piece of advice is as follows: As you begin this new stage of your lives, follow your passion. If you don’t have a passion, don’t be satisfied until you find one. Life is too short to go through it without caring deeply about something. When I was your age, I was incredibly single-minded in my goal to be a physicist. After college, I spent eight years as a graduate student and postdoc at Berkeley, and then nine years at Bell Labs. During that my time, my central focus and professional joy was physics.
Here is my final piece of advice. Pursuing a personal passion is important, but it should not be your only goal. When you are old and gray, and look back on your life, you will want to be proud of what you have done. The source of that pride won’t be the things you have acquired or the recognition you have received. It will be the lives you have touched and the difference you have made.
After nine years at Bell labs, I decided to leave that warm, cozy ivory tower for what I considered to be the “real world,” a university. Bell Labs, to quote what was said about Mary Poppins, was “practically perfect in every way,” but I wanted to leave behind something more than scientific articles. I wanted to teach and give birth to my own set of scientific children.
Ted Geballe, a friend and distinguished colleague of mine at Stanford, who also went from Berkeley to Bell Labs to Stanford years earlier, described our motives best:
“The best part of working at a university is the students. They come in fresh, enthusiastic, open to ideas, unscarred by the battles of life. They don't realize it, but they're the recipients of the best our society can offer. If a mind is ever free to be creative, that's the time. They come in believing textbooks are authoritative, but eventually they figure out that textbooks and professors don't know everything, and then they start to think on their own. Then, I begin learning from them.”
My students, post doctoral fellows, and the young researchers who worked with me at Bell Labs, Stanford, and Berkeley have been extraordinary. Over 30 former group members are now professors, many at the best research institutions in the world, including Harvard. I have learned much from them. Even now, in rare moments on weekends, the remaining members of my biophysics group meet with me in the ether world of cyberspace.
I began teaching with the idea of giving back; I received more than I gave. This brings me to the final movement of this speech. It begins with a story about an extraordinary scientific discovery and a new dilemma that it poses. It’s a call to arms and about making a difference.
In the last several decades, our climate has been changing. Climate change is not new: the Earth went through six ice ages in the past 600,000 years. However, recent measurements show that the climate has begun to change rapidly. The size of the North Polar Ice Cap in the month of September is only half the size it was a mere 50 years ago. The sea level which been rising since direct measurements began in 1870 at a rate that is now five times faster than it was at the beginning of recorded measurements. Here’s the remarkable scientific discovery. For the first time in human history, science is now making predictions of how our actions will affect the world 50 and 100 years from now. These changes are due to an increase in carbon dioxide put into the atmosphere since the beginning of the Industrial Revolution. The Earth has warmed up by roughly 0.8 degrees Celsius since the beginning of the Revolution. There is already approximately a 1 degree rise built into the system, even if we stop all greenhouse gas emissions today. Why? It will take decades to warm up the deep oceans before the temperature reaches a new equilibrium.
If the world continues on a business-as-usual path, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change predicts that there is a fifty-fifty chance the temperature will exceed 5 degrees by the end of this century. This increase may not sound like much, but let me remind you that during the last ice age, the world was only 6 degrees colder. During this time, most of Canada and the United States down to Ohio and Pennsylvania were covered year round by a glacier. A world 5 degrees warmer will be very different. The change will be so rapid that many species, including Humans, will have a hard time adapting. I’ve been told for example, that, in a much warmer world, insects were bigger. I wonder if this thing buzzing around is a precursor.
We also face the specter of nonlinear “tipping points” that may cause much more severe changes. An example of a tipping point is the thawing of the permafrost. The permafrost contains immense amounts of frozen organic matter that have been accumulating for millennia. If the soil melts, microbes will spring to life and cause this debris to rot. The difference in biological activity below freezing and above freezing is something we are all familiar with. Frozen food remains edible for a very long time in the freezer, but once thawed, it spoils quickly. How much methane and carbon dioxide might be released from the rotting permafrost? If even a fraction of the carbon is released, it could be greater than all the greenhouse gases we have released to since the beginning of the industrial revolution. Once started, a runaway effect could occur.
The climate problem is the unintended consequence of our success. We depend on fossil energy to keep our homes warm in the winter, cool in the summer, and lit at night; we use it to travel across town and across continents. Energy is a fundamental reason for the prosperity we enjoy, and we will not surrender this prosperity. The United States has 3 percent of the world population, and yet, we consume 25 percent of the energy. By contrast, there are 1.6 billion people who don’t have access to electricity. Hundreds of millions of people still cook with twigs or dung. The life we enjoy may not be within the reach of the developing world, but it is within sight, and they want what we have.
Here is the dilemma. How much are we willing to invest, as a world society, to mitigate the consequences of climate change that will not be realized for at least 100 years? Deeply rooted in all cultures, is the notion of generational responsibility. Parents work hard so that their children will have a better life. Climate change will affect the entire world, but our natural focus is on the welfare of our immediate families. Can we, as a world society, meet our responsibility to future generations?
While I am worried, I am hopeful we will solve this problem. I became the director of the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory, in part because I wanted to enlist some of the best scientific minds to help battle against climate change. I was there only four and a half years, the shortest serving director in the 78-year history of the Lab, but when I left, a number of very exciting energy institutes at the Berkeley Lab and UC Berkeley had been established.
I am extremely privileged to be part of the Obama administration. If there ever was a time to help steer America and the world towards a path of sustainable energy, now is the time. The message the President is delivering is not one of doom and gloom, but of optimism and opportunity. I share this optimism. The task ahead is daunting, but we can and will succeed.
We know some of the answers already. There are immediate and significant savings in energy efficiency and conservation. Energy efficiency is not just low-hanging fruit; it is fruit lying on the ground. For example, we have the potential to make buildings 80 percent more efficient with investments that will pay for themselves in less than 15 years. Buildings consume 40 percent of the energy we use, and a transition to energy efficient buildings will cut our carbon emissions by one-third.
We are revving up the remarkable American innovation machine that will be the basis of a new American prosperity. We will invent much improved methods to harness the sun, the wind, nuclear power, and capture and sequester the carbon dioxide emitted from our power plants. Advanced bio-fuels and the electrification of personal vehicles make us less dependent on foreign oil.
In the coming decades, we will almost certainly face higher oil prices and be in a carbon-constrained economy. We have the opportunity to lead in development of a new, industrial revolution. The great hockey player, Wayne Gretzky, when asked, how he positions himself on the ice, he replied,“ I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it’s been.” America should do the same.
The Obama administration is laying a new foundation for a prosperous and sustainable energy future, but we don’t have all of the answers. That’s where you come in. In this address, I am asking you, the Harvard graduates, to join us. As our future intellectual leaders, take the time to learn more about what’s at stake, and then act on that knowledge. As future scientists and engineers, I ask you to give us better technology solutions. As future economists and political scientists, I ask you to create better policy options. As future business leaders, I ask that you make sustainability an integral part of your business.
奥Finally, as humanists, I ask that you speak to our common humanity. One of the cruelest ironies about climate change is that the ones who will be hurt the most are the most innocent: the worlds poorest and those yet to be born.
The coda to this last movement is borrowed from two humanists.
The first quote is from Martin Luther King. He spoke on ending the war in Vietnam in 1967, but his message seems so fitting for today’s climate crisis:
“This call for a worldwide fellowship that lifts neighborly concern beyond one's tribe, race, class, and nation is in reality a call for an all-embracing and unconditional love for all mankind. This oft misunderstood, this oft misinterpreted concept, so readily dismissed by the Nietzsches of the world as a weak and cowardly force, has now become an absolute necessity for the survival of man … We are now faced with the fact, my friends, that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now. In this unfolding conundrum of life and history, there is such a thing as being too late.”
The final message is from William Faulkner. On December 10th, 1950, his Nobel Prize banquet speech was about the role of humanists in a world facing potential nuclear holocaust.
“I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. He is immortal, not because he alone among creatures has an inexhaustible voice, but because he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance. The poet's, the writer's, duty is to write about these things. It is his privilege to help man endure by lifting his heart, by reminding him of the courage and honor and hope and pride and compassion and pity and sacrifice which have been the glory of his past.”
Graduates, you have an extraordinary role to play in our future. As you pursue your private passions, I hope you will also develop a passion and a voice to help the world in ways both large and small. Nothing will give you greater satisfaction.
Please accept my warmest congratulations. May you prosper, may you help preserve and save our planet for your children, and all future children of the world.
http://www.yeeyan.com/articles/view/adong/47533
声明：本文是在阮一峰的翻译基础上修改的。阮一峰的原作在这里。
http://www.ruanyifeng.com/blog/2009/0/remarks_of_stenven_chu_in_harvard_commencement_2009.html
他的翻译虽好，但是并没有把前半部分朱棣文搞笑的地方翻译出来。所以在这里重译。后半部分不再重译了。
我不清楚我自己能不能当得起哈佛大学毕业典礼演讲人的高标准。去年在此演讲的是亿万富翁小说家J.K.罗琳。她最早是读古典文学的。前年站在这里的是超亿万富翁慈善家比尔·盖茨。他是个电脑呆子。今年糟糕了，就剩下我了。我没钱，不过我起码还是个书呆子。
我感谢哈佛大学授予我荣誉学位，这项荣誉对我来说比你们想到的还要重要。你看，学术上我是我们家的异类。我的哥哥在麻省理工和哈佛拿了医学和哲学双料博士；我的弟弟在哈佛拿了法律学位。我本人得到诺贝尔奖的时候，我想我的妈妈会高兴。但并非如此。消息公布的那天早上，我给她打电话，她听了只说：“不错，不过你下次什么时候来看我啊？” 现在我在兄弟之中最后一个拿到了哈佛学位，也许这一次她可以满意了吧。
在哈佛大学毕业典礼上发表演说，还有一个难处，那就是你们中有些人可能对我从前人的演讲借用一部分有所不满。我请你们谅解我。这是因为我有两个理由。
首先，为了产生影响力，重复传递同样的信息很重要。在科学中，第一个发现者是重要的，但是成为公众所知的那最后一个做出这个发现的人也许更重要。
其次，一个借鉴他人的作者，跟随的是最优秀的前人的脚步。Ralph Waldo Emerson（爱默生，诗人）18岁就从哈佛毕业。他曾经写到：“我所有最棒的想法都被古人剽窃了。” 毕加索说，“好的艺术家借鉴，伟大的艺术家偷窃。”那为什么毕业典礼的演说者就需要更高的标准呢？
我向哈佛毕业生发表演说，这实在非常吊诡，因为如果当年要是我有胆子申请，哈佛一定会拒我。我的妻子是“Jean主任”。她曾经在斯坦福大学担任招生主任，她向我保证，如果有机会的话，她一定会拒绝我。当我把这篇演讲的草稿给她过目，她强烈反对我使用“拒绝”这个词.她从来不拒绝任何申请者。在拒绝信中她总是写：“我们无法提供你入学机会。”我实在搞不懂这两者的区别何在。毕竟，那些牛校的“招生主任”事实上就是“拒绝主任”。显然，我真需要好好学学市场营销。
不请自来的忠告
我的演讲将遵循毕业典礼演讲的经典结构。刚才是第一乐章——轻快的闲谈。接下来的第二乐章包括的是不请自来的忠告。这样的忠告不常被人珍视，很少有人铭记，更绝对不会被付诸实践。就像王尔德说的：“对于良好建议，唯一能做之事，就是把它送给别人，因为它对一个人自己来说没有任何用处。” 那么，忠告来了。第一，每当你取得成就的时候，不要忘记帮助过你的人。要感谢支持你的父母和朋友，要感谢那些启发过你的教授，而且尤其要感谢教的不怎么样的教授。有了他们，你就不得不自学。从长远看，自学能力是优秀的全面教育中必不可少的，这将成为你成功的关键。你应当去拥抱你的同学，感谢他们同你进行过的许多次彻夜长谈，这为你的教育带来了无法衡量的价值。当然，你还要感谢哈佛大学，如果你忘了，还有个负责提醒你的校友会。第二，在你们未来的人生中，培养一种慷慨大方的精神。在任何谈判中，都不要为了最后微小的一丁点利益讨价还价。不要把桌上的钱都拿走。在合作中，永远记住荣誉不是一个守恒的量。在一次成功合作中，任何一方都应获得全部荣誉的九成。
电影《Harvey》中，Jimmy Stewart扮演的角色Elwood P. Dowd，就完全理解这一点。他说：“多年前，母亲曾经对我说，‘Elwood，在这个世界上，你要么就做一个杠杠的聪明人，要么就做一个杠杠的好人。'” 这个嘛，我这些年都属于聪明人……我推荐做好人。你们可以告诉别人这是我说的。
我的第三个忠告是，当你马上开始生活的这个新阶段时，请跟随你的激情前进。如果你对任何东西都没有激情，就去寻找，找到之前誓不罢休。生命太短暂了，不能漠不关心的度过，你必须对某样东西倾注你的深情。我在你们这个年龄，是超级的一根筋，我的目标就是非成为物理学家不可。本科毕业后，我在加州大学伯克利分校又待了8年，读完了研究生，做完了博士后，然后去贝尔实验室待了9年。在这些年中，我关注的中心和职业上的全部乐趣，都来自物理学。
我还有最后一个忠告，就是说兴趣爱好固然重要，但是不应该是你的唯一目标。当你白发苍苍、垂垂老矣、回首人生时，你需要为自己做过的事感到自豪。你买到的物质享受，获得的荣誉，这些都不是自豪感的来源。自豪感只能来自那些你触摸过的生命，以及你在他们身上造成的改变。
在贝尔实验室待了9年后，我决定离开这个温暖舒适的象牙塔，走进我眼中的“真实世界”——大学。我对贝尔实验室的看法，可以引用描述Mary Poppins的话，“基本上在任何方面都十全十美”。但是，除了科学论文，我还想做出更多的贡献。我要去教书，培育我自己在科学上的后代。
我在斯坦福大学有一个好友兼杰出同事Ted Geballe。他也是从伯克利分校去了贝尔实验室，几年前又离开贝尔实验室去了斯坦福大学。他对我们的动机做出了最佳描述：
“在大学工作，最棒的部分就是学生。他们入校时生机勃勃，充满热情，思想开放，还没在生活的战斗中变得伤痕累累。虽然他们自己没有意识到，但是他们接受的是社会所能提供的最精华的教育。如果生命中还有一段时间是思想自由和充满创造力的话，那就是在大学里那段时光。入校时，学生们对课本上的一字一句毫不怀疑，渐渐地，他们发现课本和教授并不是无所不知的，于是他们开始独立思考。从那时起，就轮到我向他们学习了。”
我在贝尔实验室，斯坦福，伯克利教过的学生和博士后以及合作过的年轻同事，他们都非常优秀。他们中有30多人现在已经是教授了。许多人在全世界第一流的研究机构工作，也包括哈佛大学。我从他们身上学到了很多东西。即使现在，在少有的周末空暇时，我们剩下的生物物理研究组的成员还会和我在虚拟空间的以太世界里面相聚。
Madam President Faust, members of the Harvard Corporation and the Board of Overseers, faculty, family, friends, and, most importantly, today’s graduates,
Thank you for letting me share this wonderful day with you.
I am not sure I can live up to the high standards of Harvard Commencement speakers. Last year, J.K. Rowling, the billionaire novelist, who started as a classics student, graced this podium. The year before, Bill Gates, the mega-billionaire philanthropist and computer nerd stood here. Today, sadly, you have me. I am not wealthy, but at least I am a nerd.
I am grateful to receive an honorary degree from Harvard, an honor that means more to me than you might care to imagine. You see, I was the academic black sheep of my family. My older brother has an M.D./Ph.D. from MIT and Harvard while my younger brother has a law degree from Harvard. When I was awarded a Nobel Prize, I thought my mother would be pleased. Not so. When I called her on the morning of the announcement, she replied, “That’s nice, but when are you going to visit me next.” Now, as the last brother with a degree from Harvard, maybe, at last, she will be satisfied.
Another difficulty with giving a Harvard commencement address is that some of you may disapprove of the fact that I have borrowed material from previous speeches. I ask that you forgive me for two reasons.
First, in order to have impact,it is important to deliver the same message more than once. In science, it is important to be the first person to make a discovery, but it is even more important to be the last person to make that discovery.
Second, authors who borrow from others are following in the footsteps of the best. Ralph Waldo Emerson, who graduated from Harvard at the age of 18, noted “All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients.” Picasso declared “Good artists borrow. Great artists steal.” Why should commencement speakers be held to a higher standard?
I also want to point out the irony of speaking to graduates of an institution that would have rejected me, had I the chutzpah to apply. I am married to “Dean Jean,” the former dean of admissions at Stanford. She assures me that she would have rejected me, if given the chance. When I showed her a draft of this speech, she objected strongly to my use of the word “rejected.” She never rejected applicants; her letters stated that “we are unable to offer you admission.” I have difficulty understanding the difference. After all, deans of admissions of highly selective schools are in reality, “deans of rejection.” Clearly, I have a lot to learn about marketing.
My address will follow the classical sonata form of commencement addresses. The first movement, just presented, were light-hearted remarks. This next movement consists of unsolicited advice, which is rarely valued, seldom remembered, never followed. As Oscar Wilde said, “The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.” So, here comes the advice. First, every time you celebrate an achievement, be thankful to those who made it possible. Thank your parents and friends who supported you, thank your professors who were inspirational, and especially thank the other professors whose less-than-brilliant lectures forced you to teach yourself. Going forward, the ability to teach yourself is the hallmark of a great liberal arts education and will be the key to your success. To your fellow students who have added immeasurably to your education during those late night discussions, hug them. Also, of course, thank Harvard. Should you forget, there’s an alumni association to remind you. Second, in your future life, cultivate a generous spirit. In all negotiations, don’t bargain for the last, little advantage. Leave the change on the table. In your collaborations, always remember that “credit” is not a conserved quantity. In a successful collaboration, everybody gets 90 percent of the credit.
Jimmy Stewart, as Elwood P. Dowd in the movie “Harvey” got it exactly right. He said: “Years ago my mother used to say to me, ‘In this world, Elwood, you must be … she always used to call me Elwood … in this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.’” Well, for years I was smart. ... I recommend pleasant. You may quote me on that.
My third piece of advice is as follows: As you begin this new stage of your lives, follow your passion. If you don’t have a passion, don’t be satisfied until you find one. Life is too short to go through it without caring deeply about something. When I was your age, I was incredibly single-minded in my goal to be a physicist. After college, I spent eight years as a graduate student and postdoc at Berkeley, and then nine years at Bell Labs. During that my time, my central focus and professional joy was physics.
Here is my final piece of advice. Pursuing a personal passion is important, but it should not be your only goal. When you are old and gray, and look back on your life, you will want to be proud of what you have done. The source of that pride won’t be the things you have acquired or the recognition you have received. It will be the lives you have touched and the difference you have made.
After nine years at Bell labs, I decided to leave that warm, cozy ivory tower for what I considered to be the “real world,” a university. Bell Labs, to quote what was said about Mary Poppins, was “practically perfect in every way,” but I wanted to leave behind something more than scientific articles. I wanted to teach and give birth to my own set of scientific children.
Ted Geballe, a friend and distinguished colleague of mine at Stanford, who also went from Berkeley to Bell Labs to Stanford years earlier, described our motives best:
“The best part of working at a university is the students. They come in fresh, enthusiastic, open to ideas, unscarred by the battles of life. They don't realize it, but they're the recipients of the best our society can offer. If a mind is ever free to be creative, that's the time. They come in believing textbooks are authoritative, but eventually they figure out that textbooks and professors don't know everything, and then they start to think on their own. Then, I begin learning from them.”
My students, post doctoral fellows, and the young researchers who worked with me at Bell Labs, Stanford, and Berkeley have been extraordinary. Over 30 former group members are now professors, many at the best research institutions in the world, including Harvard. I have learned much from them. Even now, in rare moments on weekends, the remaining members of my biophysics group meet with me in the ether world of cyberspace.
I began teaching with the idea of giving back; I received more than I gave. This brings me to the final movement of this speech. It begins with a story about an extraordinary scientific discovery and a new dilemma that it poses. It’s a call to arms and about making a difference.
In the last several decades, our climate has been changing. Climate change is not new: the Earth went through six ice ages in the past 600,000 years. However, recent measurements show that the climate has begun to change rapidly. The size of the North Polar Ice Cap in the month of September is only half the size it was a mere 50 years ago. The sea level which been rising since direct measurements began in 1870 at a rate that is now five times faster than it was at the beginning of recorded measurements. Here’s the remarkable scientific discovery. For the first time in human history, science is now making predictions of how our actions will affect the world 50 and 100 years from now. These changes are due to an increase in carbon dioxide put into the atmosphere since the beginning of the Industrial Revolution. The Earth has warmed up by roughly 0.8 degrees Celsius since the beginning of the Revolution. There is already approximately a 1 degree rise built into the system, even if we stop all greenhouse gas emissions today. Why? It will take decades to warm up the deep oceans before the temperature reaches a new equilibrium.
If the world continues on a business-as-usual path, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change predicts that there is a fifty-fifty chance the temperature will exceed 5 degrees by the end of this century. This increase may not sound like much, but let me remind you that during the last ice age, the world was only 6 degrees colder. During this time, most of Canada and the United States down to Ohio and Pennsylvania were covered year round by a glacier. A world 5 degrees warmer will be very different. The change will be so rapid that many species, including Humans, will have a hard time adapting. I’ve been told for example, that, in a much warmer world, insects were bigger. I wonder if this thing buzzing around is a precursor.
We also face the specter of nonlinear “tipping points” that may cause much more severe changes. An example of a tipping point is the thawing of the permafrost. The permafrost contains immense amounts of frozen organic matter that have been accumulating for millennia. If the soil melts, microbes will spring to life and cause this debris to rot. The difference in biological activity below freezing and above freezing is something we are all familiar with. Frozen food remains edible for a very long time in the freezer, but once thawed, it spoils quickly. How much methane and carbon dioxide might be released from the rotting permafrost? If even a fraction of the carbon is released, it could be greater than all the greenhouse gases we have released to since the beginning of the industrial revolution. Once started, a runaway effect could occur.
The climate problem is the unintended consequence of our success. We depend on fossil energy to keep our homes warm in the winter, cool in the summer, and lit at night; we use it to travel across town and across continents. Energy is a fundamental reason for the prosperity we enjoy, and we will not surrender this prosperity. The United States has 3 percent of the world population, and yet, we consume 25 percent of the energy. By contrast, there are 1.6 billion people who don’t have access to electricity. Hundreds of millions of people still cook with twigs or dung. The life we enjoy may not be within the reach of the developing world, but it is within sight, and they want what we have.
Here is the dilemma. How much are we willing to invest, as a world society, to mitigate the consequences of climate change that will not be realized for at least 100 years? Deeply rooted in all cultures, is the notion of generational responsibility. Parents work hard so that their children will have a better life. Climate change will affect the entire world, but our natural focus is on the welfare of our immediate families. Can we, as a world society, meet our responsibility to future generations?
While I am worried, I am hopeful we will solve this problem. I became the director of the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory, in part because I wanted to enlist some of the best scientific minds to help battle against climate change. I was there only four and a half years, the shortest serving director in the 78-year history of the Lab, but when I left, a number of very exciting energy institutes at the Berkeley Lab and UC Berkeley had been established.
I am extremely privileged to be part of the Obama administration. If there ever was a time to help steer America and the world towards a path of sustainable energy, now is the time. The message the President is delivering is not one of doom and gloom, but of optimism and opportunity. I share this optimism. The task ahead is daunting, but we can and will succeed.
We know some of the answers already. There are immediate and significant savings in energy efficiency and conservation. Energy efficiency is not just low-hanging fruit; it is fruit lying on the ground. For example, we have the potential to make buildings 80 percent more efficient with investments that will pay for themselves in less than 15 years. Buildings consume 40 percent of the energy we use, and a transition to energy efficient buildings will cut our carbon emissions by one-third.
We are revving up the remarkable American innovation machine that will be the basis of a new American prosperity. We will invent much improved methods to harness the sun, the wind, nuclear power, and capture and sequester the carbon dioxide emitted from our power plants. Advanced bio-fuels and the electrification of personal vehicles make us less dependent on foreign oil.
In the coming decades, we will almost certainly face higher oil prices and be in a carbon-constrained economy. We have the opportunity to lead in development of a new, industrial revolution. The great hockey player, Wayne Gretzky, when asked, how he positions himself on the ice, he replied,“ I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it’s been.” America should do the same.
The Obama administration is laying a new foundation for a prosperous and sustainable energy future, but we don’t have all of the answers. That’s where you come in. In this address, I am asking you, the Harvard graduates, to join us. As our future intellectual leaders, take the time to learn more about what’s at stake, and then act on that knowledge. As future scientists and engineers, I ask you to give us better technology solutions. As future economists and political scientists, I ask you to create better policy options. As future business leaders, I ask that you make sustainability an integral part of your business.
奥Finally, as humanists, I ask that you speak to our common humanity. One of the cruelest ironies about climate change is that the ones who will be hurt the most are the most innocent: the worlds poorest and those yet to be born.
The coda to this last movement is borrowed from two humanists.
The first quote is from Martin Luther King. He spoke on ending the war in Vietnam in 1967, but his message seems so fitting for today’s climate crisis:
“This call for a worldwide fellowship that lifts neighborly concern beyond one's tribe, race, class, and nation is in reality a call for an all-embracing and unconditional love for all mankind. This oft misunderstood, this oft misinterpreted concept, so readily dismissed by the Nietzsches of the world as a weak and cowardly force, has now become an absolute necessity for the survival of man … We are now faced with the fact, my friends, that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now. In this unfolding conundrum of life and history, there is such a thing as being too late.”
The final message is from William Faulkner. On December 10th, 1950, his Nobel Prize banquet speech was about the role of humanists in a world facing potential nuclear holocaust.
“I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. He is immortal, not because he alone among creatures has an inexhaustible voice, but because he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance. The poet's, the writer's, duty is to write about these things. It is his privilege to help man endure by lifting his heart, by reminding him of the courage and honor and hope and pride and compassion and pity and sacrifice which have been the glory of his past.”
Graduates, you have an extraordinary role to play in our future. As you pursue your private passions, I hope you will also develop a passion and a voice to help the world in ways both large and small. Nothing will give you greater satisfaction.
Please accept my warmest congratulations. May you prosper, may you help preserve and save our planet for your children, and all future children of the world.
穷二代”18条标准
网友列出“穷二代”18条标准{ZT}
http://www.xcar.com.cn/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=10416216
晒富、飙车撞人，少数“富二代”的行为引起社会公愤，某地花钱为他们开培训班的做法更是在网上被炒得沸沸扬扬。20日凌晨3点左右，与“富二代”概念相对的博文《“贫二代”（穷二代）的标准》在网上一经发布，就受到网友关注。
博文作者石述思是北京某媒体工作者。石述思对穷二代的定义是：那些没有致富的产业工人或者农民，他们的子女如今有很多仍属于弱势群体。他说：“如果符合其中部分标准，那就需要高度警惕，努力鼓起生活的风帆，最终还要靠你的努力。”
·七夕情人节告白赢大奖 ·美女时尚秀火热征集
博文中“穷二代”的18个标准：
1.在各种“拼爹”(注：比拼老爹，指学得好不如有个好爸爸)游戏中失败。
2.感到当农民工和大学生区别不大，于是勇敢地放弃高考。
3.别人说：家里钱不是问题；你说：问题是家里没钱。
4.寒暑假，经常需要到田里收庄稼或在城里打工挣学费。
5.有当城管的冲动，能罩着天天被驱逐的父母。
6.经常有扼住命运喉咙的冲动，但每次喉咙都被命运扼住。
7.如果读过《红楼梦》，最受触动的应该是晴雯的判词：心比天高，命比纸薄。
8.对“宁当富人三奶，不嫁穷人”的说法强烈认同。
9.从不思考“永远有多远”这样的蠢问题，却经常为明天发愁。
10.在城市经常被取笑甚至欺负，熟悉各种人的白眼。
11.从迷恋个人奋斗到觉得奋斗根本改变不了命运。
12.最熟悉的交通工具是农用车、火车和长途大巴。
13.熟悉人民币分币的购买力。
14.家里往往有没有户口的兄弟姐妹。
15.有仇富心理，并十分痛恨贪官，觉得他们不仅夺取了你父辈的财富，更夺取了你翻身的机会。
16.害怕自己尤其是家人生病，特别是慢性病，因为没医保。
17.经常看《读者》之类的“心灵鸡汤”，但好多姐妹为生活选择了“出卖自己”的方式。
18.大体认同这样一种说法：生活中的一切事情，都要靠自己的双手解决，无法反抗就要学会接受。
http://www.xcar.com.cn/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=10416216
晒富、飙车撞人，少数“富二代”的行为引起社会公愤，某地花钱为他们开培训班的做法更是在网上被炒得沸沸扬扬。20日凌晨3点左右，与“富二代”概念相对的博文《“贫二代”（穷二代）的标准》在网上一经发布，就受到网友关注。
博文作者石述思是北京某媒体工作者。石述思对穷二代的定义是：那些没有致富的产业工人或者农民，他们的子女如今有很多仍属于弱势群体。他说：“如果符合其中部分标准，那就需要高度警惕，努力鼓起生活的风帆，最终还要靠你的努力。”
·七夕情人节告白赢大奖 ·美女时尚秀火热征集
博文中“穷二代”的18个标准：
1.在各种“拼爹”(注：比拼老爹，指学得好不如有个好爸爸)游戏中失败。
2.感到当农民工和大学生区别不大，于是勇敢地放弃高考。
3.别人说：家里钱不是问题；你说：问题是家里没钱。
4.寒暑假，经常需要到田里收庄稼或在城里打工挣学费。
5.有当城管的冲动，能罩着天天被驱逐的父母。
6.经常有扼住命运喉咙的冲动，但每次喉咙都被命运扼住。
7.如果读过《红楼梦》，最受触动的应该是晴雯的判词：心比天高，命比纸薄。
8.对“宁当富人三奶，不嫁穷人”的说法强烈认同。
9.从不思考“永远有多远”这样的蠢问题，却经常为明天发愁。
10.在城市经常被取笑甚至欺负，熟悉各种人的白眼。
11.从迷恋个人奋斗到觉得奋斗根本改变不了命运。
12.最熟悉的交通工具是农用车、火车和长途大巴。
13.熟悉人民币分币的购买力。
14.家里往往有没有户口的兄弟姐妹。
15.有仇富心理，并十分痛恨贪官，觉得他们不仅夺取了你父辈的财富，更夺取了你翻身的机会。
16.害怕自己尤其是家人生病，特别是慢性病，因为没医保。
17.经常看《读者》之类的“心灵鸡汤”，但好多姐妹为生活选择了“出卖自己”的方式。
18.大体认同这样一种说法：生活中的一切事情，都要靠自己的双手解决，无法反抗就要学会接受。
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)